Where’s the source?

He was right along, boys. He’s still hilarious.

Missy, Joe, and Dawn are giddy right now. "Hurry up and get to the reading of the will part!!"

You think Missy's in the will?

Anthony was beta pussy enough to take her back after he had her arrested for burglarizing and trashing his house, so I can only assume he'd be weak enough to leave his live-in prostitute a chunk of money in the will. For a "hush money" severance package at least.

I think the more likely scenario is that she told him to write her in or she’d make him a “knuckle sandwich, dork.”

"Gimme fiddy thou' "

Lenny Dykstra got outed fucking a black prostitute because he gave her a $1000 bad cheque. He's probably going to teach Ant to keep his pay-girls paid.

https://radaronline.com/exclusives/2010/12/exclusive-interview-scorned-hooker-says-baseball-legend-lenny-dykstra-thinks-he/

What hooker takes a check?

One of the lowest stock.

Any stats?

Blacks don't keep spreadsheets.

Hey finding a chick who can carry you up the stairs after you pass out in the karaoke room is not easy.

nope.

JoeMo is going to be humming the Jeffersons theme for the next week.

Hahahahah...jesus thats fucking terrible but funny.

Who the fuck is Dave? And how the fuck does a "professional" radio program not have topics prepped. Not that any blue collar white trash trucker would give a fuck, but two of the most thrilling soccer games of all time have happened in the past two days. Make fun of that for a while, especially because Tottenham (the Yids) and Ajax (de Joden) are heeb teams.

soccer

gay

Dave Thomas the Wendy’s dude

Dead

Soccer? Shit, what country are you from?

Americans watching "soccer" is pretty cringy.

Dave did no prep??? My god. The standards.

Nice paying for compound media, stupid

just because he watches doesn't mean he pays for it..

SUBPOENA

They don’t have best of’s cued for just these occasions?

That’s what the announcement of Ant’s failing health was.

Best ofs? That would just be dead air

Why aren't the six dudes at /r/tacn discussing this if it actually happened? I looked at Compound twitter & its just one borderline retarded guy talking to himself.

“That kid is gonna be put on spit in prison” Joe is in prison?

There's a post that says nana came in 20 mins late jew to bad traffics.

Like Dave has ever brought interesting show prep to any show ever.

I, at first, thought you were talking about East Side Dave. How disappointing...

Holy shit you faggots actually pay for and watch compound media?!

If only he had a worldwide broadcast platform people would actually want to watch.

If Keith was smart, he'd broadcast Anthony's death live on Compound Media.

If Keith was smart,

If “ifs” and “buts” were candies and nuts we’d all have a merry Christmas

now get back to work chief

i love good natured light hearted fun comments like that

He has been for the past 5 years.

Feed Nana (death).

Joe has probably been feeding Nana poison. Think about it, who is Anthony's next of kin? He doesn't have children. His bitch ex wife would NEVER get a single cent from him again. How will get his fortune and promptly squander it in half witted schemes fueled by delusions of grandeur.

Dude has a stent. So does his tubby unemployed slob brother. Remember faggot Joe told us recently that Anthony is healthier than ever? Lyin ass Joe.

As we all know, drug abuse combined with aging and a lonely, sedentary lifestyle are the pillars of health

The egg raised his blood pressure and his tiny cock

Being not only gay but secretly and embarrassingly gay must take 20 years off your life.

I heard 🐜 takes lots of pillars!

M

What exactly is a stent? A lot of people seem to have them when they go to prison.

It's a small rigid mesh-like thing that keeps an artery expanded so blood can flow. As opposed to it closing up from chalking up with fat-like particles.

I should get a few for meself. I got a ass that won't quit.

You disgusting fat-body

Get out of here, ToolMan.

Can I fuck it before you lose it?

hahahaahaha, that's our knickers!

Joe Cumia lying? No.

I'm dripping with pre. Keep us updated.

Here comes the pre

Sounds like Joe is going to be bagging groceries soon

I know that Ant "hates" children, but do you think he has a college fund set up for Layla? Putting some money on a CD for your niece would be a normal rich Uncle thing to do .

Um she's not going to liberal indoctrination camp, sorry.

She’s gonna get molested by her uncle like a good traditional family would

On his new boat.

I wanna see the boat movie

I mean can you deny that's actually what its become though? Most girls go to college completely normal and come out with half a shaved head, armpit hair and talking about how men are scum.

nigger.

U ok, m8?

rich Uncle

Anthony is not rich, maybe lower upper middle class at best. definitely doesn't help he's pissing away money because I doubt Compound Media is turning him a profit and now he has a health scare and still has to payroll his harem of trannys and Bovine Joe

Layla's like 9? So a CD with 10 grand in 2011 wouldn't have been that crazy, but he probably didn't do that.

Anthony still has over 10 million dollars. Do you have over 10 million dollars? Hmm didn’t think so.

Yeah I doubt that.

That's why he and keith begged opie to buy half of CP media?

Zero chance he had over ten million dollars. How much do you think Sirius/XM was paying him before he got fired?

You spelled pockmarks wrong.

When his subscriber numbers leaked last year some people calculated he couldn't be making more than 100 grand per year with cp media. Considering what he pays in property taxes, the studio costs, and his $1,000 a month just in electricity bills there's no way he's not bleeding massive amounts of money

LOL are you fucking joking? Ant and Joe have not been remotely close to responsible with money at any point in their lives. You think he set Layla up with a college fund before or after the plastic raptor? Or the 5th Chinese Squire?

Joe would definitely have bragged about it to us by now.

Trying to fuck her is what a nigger rich pedo uncle would do.

Instead of getting tea bagged by black gentlemen

On the bright side, he will also be the new host of the The Joe Cumia Show with Dave Landau.

That white trash family will be in court including keith for years tearing each other to shreds for every scrap of money.

He'd have to go back to peeling spuds.

Don't want to let that military training go to waste.

If he dies, how long does Keith keep up the act before announcing the death?

They'll just put his dumb Jaws costume standee in front of the green screen and have it say "ha ha ha holy shit!" for a year or two. No one will know the difference.

Pennies on the dollar for the robot which smashes the table with a fist and plays back the same three 1950s TV references Ant makes every show.

Press the "Try me" button and he says black crime statistics

it'll be a weekend at Bernie's situation. They'll prop the corpse on the chair and put a pair of sunglasses on him. they'll change one of his shirts daily too.

They already have experience from doing it with Artie so who knows maybe it will fool us this time.

10 days or long enough for KTC to empty out ants McMansion.

You know goddamn well there's a phone network of people who know the door code all waiting for confirmation, all just circling the neighborhood with Uhaul trailers.

He’ll announce on Twitter that they’re having some technical issues with the hospital that are completely outside their control, and that things should return to normal soon.

Weekend At The Compound!

Regardless of how long it takes, one thing we can all guarantee is that he'll fuck it up.

Have his pallbearers started to rehearse yet?

Now watch me whip

Now watch me nae nae

By the looks of it.... nope. https://video.twimg.com/ext_tw_video/1124667373104050178/pu/vid/480x480/7peXynkvaA6nDnml.mp4?tag=9

What'd they think would happen.

I bet they were too lazy to practice... so while one guy was going one way, the other was going the other way. And bam, grandma's face-planting the cemetery lawn.

Thoughts and prayers

https://images.app.goo.gl/Xc7ACVii1ThQAuTf8

nice link stupid

"Where the fuck is my health!?! FUCK!"

I hope the next update is about where we can light some internet candles for him.

Too bad he was too much i of an immature pedo to ever start a family. No one will care when we deface his memorial page.

Brother Joe would probably join in and think he's totally pwning us.

Even as Ant's life drains out if his body, the mere speculation of how stupidly Joe will deal with it takes the focus

I will start going to church if he dies.

I’ve never said “omg” on reddit but

omg

You should recognize the saving grace of the lord Jesus Christ regardless if some dumb drunk guinea dies.

They're gonna electro-shock OJ!

We could have quite a development here

He's done for.

He’s still hilarious!

Wish it was Sam though, hope 🦍 fag dies in his sleep tonight.

He's got me laughing right now!

We giving you some laughs today??!!

Anthony had to go to doctor for an emergency. Heart related.

"Heart Related" = Perforated colon

Lost egg maybe?

A lawsuit could be the most profitable thing he’s done in years

A 12-inch black cock ruptured his colon while they were listening to Heart.

Sue broke his heart.

I hope nobody visits him on his deathbed. Would be fitting.

I wonder if our subreddit's talented artists have some work prepared for the big occasion...

Anthony comically clutching his chest while pill bottles and bud light cans fly everywhere would be great. Plus adding in the usual Easter eggs the artists are so good at including

And anal eggs.

Anal eggs decorated like easter eggs. Hippity Hoppity eggs are up Ants ass.

We're in the endgame now

My characters are leveled

Didn't his dad die of some heart thing? I hope the doctor says he has to stop drinking alcohol and eat better. He will wanna blow his brains out

He'll simply ignore the doctor and die in about 2 years.

WHERE THE FUCK IS HIS GUN!? FUCK!!!

Euthanize him. It’s the only thing you can do at this stage.

This can't be the sub's end-game... we still have so many faggots to call faggots!

If he dies, he dies

♪♫ Ain't it fun ♫♫

God be with him tho no bs

Thoughts and prayers

Nobody fed nana

He better be fucking dead this time

Do the bit.

Is this just a cover story so he can get more plugs slapped into his elderly guinea scalp?

He's just off on another of his spontaneous vacations

Everyone here is saying things about Anthonys family getting Anthonys money after he is gone. Yall forget that KTC has power of attorney over Anthony and has undoubtedly drained Anthonys money into private or "business" accounts. The Cumias will inherit Bevis and a karaoke machine and thats about it. The dinosaur statue will be auctioned off along with Ants other valuables to help pay for back taxes and mortgages on the compound.

Joe gains ownership of Bobo.

Ya kiddin?

Will Jim temporarily break character from Chip at the funeral to bury the hatchet with Opie?

No, to bury his face in Ant's ass one last time

I'll continue praying for his death.

This is like the 3rd or 4th time nana has "fallen ill" so far this year. He can't last much longer.

Next step: retirement home before the final destination.

I'm confident he will last one more Christmas

Joe will skip the funeral.

Stuffing his crater face with xanax and bud light not working out for him?

nobody watches his show so we cannot confirm nor deny. Ill run with da bit tho

Every once and a while I watch one of the free Compound Media clips Anthony puts up... it’s more sad than anything. You can tell he is in terrible health and completely out of it. He is no longer with it enough to come up with the wui k witty jokes he was once known for. Just throwing out Colombo references an giving literally painful fake laughs to the charisma vacuum Dave Landow. Death will be a treat for Anthony.

I hope he lives and it transforms him. This turn would be much less fun than you think.

Watching Ant become a devout Christian, working the steps, cutting off all contact with Joe and the pack of retards that he currently surrounds himself with would be the funniest thing that could happen.

Can't wait for the tone of "this" sub to change directions yet again if he does, in fact, die and go to Heck.

Probably just a sex change

Here is a pro-tip on coronary artery disease.....If you have an emergency with your heart GO TO THE FUCKING EMERGENCY ROOM! Unfortunately, they can always fix the plumbing so he will probably be OK in the short term. However, his lifestyle puts him at extremely high risk for an early death. Heavy drinking stiffens the heart muscle leading to congestive heart failure. bad diet, lack of aerobic exercise, drug use, stress, heavy drinking. He is doing everything wrong. The only consolation is that Keith will clean the accounts out before slo-Joe knows what hits him so he won't get a dime

Joe's already prepping now to not visit him in true Cumia style if Nana ends up in a coma.

Mommy's waiting, you fuck.

You know what they say, You can’t out run mommy’s shoes forever.

Joe must be pacing in a panic, barking at his girlfriend when she starts to talk incase she suggests something about his resume.

I feel sorry for that online guest book.

It’s my birthday. Thank you, baby Jesus, for this gift.

Good luck, bro.

Hate to ruin the good times but I checked the twitter account of the one guy that watches his show and found out Anthony showed up 20 minutes late today.

I can't believe how hard Anthony has destroyed his legacy: he used to be the funniest guy on radio, he was looking to lunch for Howard's crown and I even believes they could do it. But now he is a fat old unironically racist ass loser who no one gives a fuck about. He has destroyed his actual audience. His fanbase now loves him as a punching bag and has literally zero respect for him. Just kick the bucket now and cut your losses, idiot. Or if you do survive this brush with death, I hope you realize that you are brown, and it's not so bad you dumb ass racist self hater.

A person dies two deaths: first when their soul leaves their body and then second when their name is spoken for the final time.

Anthony has set himself to accomplish the impressive and formidable task of dying his second death before his first.

EIP Anth.

Alcoholic cardiomyopathy?

Preteens and boys in wigs can all sleep a little safer tonight.

“Anthony’s obituary? I haven’t read it, but I heard it’s good”

The fans are mourning

https://i.imgur.com/c67GVa4.jpg

I genuinely hope that he dies.

I wouldn't wish any person to die after having experienced how awful it is on those who were close to them.

Good thing they aren't people.

I hope this emergency will bring Opie and Anthony back together and start talking again. Opie needs to go visit Ant in the hospital and talk it over.

"That was no heart attack..."

I hope he pulls through

I hope he pulls back the veil and walks into the light.