Please be real. Please be real.

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I am fucking AMAZED he posted his real age if it is.

This is fantastic. You know he passed around his phone around the table during one of those poker games asking the guys how he looked. And they told him he was going to get tons of snatch.

"Snatch" is definitely the word they used. Or maybe "gash".

"Tuna"

Slit, my money is on slit.

I'm sure they all used those words, can imagine them passing it round and each person using a new term when it got to them.

$50 on pelt

What the duck, is he Grizzly Adams? Sir, prepare to write me a $50 check.

punani

patch. they called it patch, god damn it!

trim

http://imgur.com/hhjKCed This is the original... Amazing what photoshop can do..

The helmet should be made of leather

Is that some sort of dating app with the swastika symbol in the task bar?

He's 65 so I dunno what you're talking about

isnt it linked to your facebook, so you kinda have to?

you can link it but you dont have to

I wouldn't have expected him to be honest about it there, either, since you aren't required to publicly display it.

Why are you amazed? He can't pass as anything under 60. His game plan is pretty much pick up young girls with daddy issues.

he specified his acceptable "looking for" age range as 13-19

Thank you so much for this.

Are you fucking kidding.

That moustache is a fucking giveaway. How do these stupid children not see it comin a mile off?

I believe you, and appreciate this is tricky, but can anyone think of a way to verify these?

Swipe Reich

http://m.imgur.com/gallery/afaaez6 Lucky for him girls in the age bracket he's seeking won't remember Dick Dastardly.

Keith on the backseat

That's fucking perfect

By "girls" you mean "little boys" I assume.

The whole selling point of this photo is the car and racetrack, just anything that can say "I have a lot of money please don't look at my face"

He looks worse than Nikki Lauda after the fire.

He looks worse than Ayrton Senna.

But less ethnic.

I dunno, Senna looked more European than Ant

A little more extra crispy at the end.

hate to be THAT guy, but Senna got hit by a tire, Lauda had the fire..

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Senna wasn't burned you silly goose.

But the funny thing is, he still doesn't come off as a guy with any money. No girl is going to understand (or care) that his Mustang is anything special, especially in New York. If he wants to play the rich guy on Tinder, he needs to post himself with some obvious shit like a new Ferrari or a private jet.

That profile makes him look like literally any other middle-aged loser on Long Island.

Him buying a Mustang is the epi-tome of rich white trash

A Super Snake GT500 is a fucking bad ass car. It's barely a Mustang.

I thought he sold it?

Traded it for a Trans Am

How about the $150,000 Jaguar F type he owns? Does that work you fucking dolt? You are just jealous that he makes more $ in a year than you will make in your entire life!

Y'ALL JUST JELLY! HATERS GONNA HATE! BLOCKED!!!!

I think he's just pointing out that if you want to really impress on Long Island, you could do a little better than standing next to a Mustang.

I literally see Ferraris and Lambos on Long Island very regularly.

Ant's is rich, don't get me wrong but that profile doesn't do anything to set him aside from a lot of other less rich and much better looking guys around here.

Congrats on missing the point dipshit.

It's an old school Italian thing, according to Colin Quinn. Wops always think their dumb car will be a pussy magnet

You leave my IROC-Z alone!

Yeah, really.

Holy shit, this is brilliant. And, too real.

He's actually catfishing girls who'd view this in a way. They'll see the pictures of him on stage, appearing to be on a set with cameras rolling, and think he's a huge deal... Then they'll Google him and find out he does a basement podcast targeted at disenchanted Wawa employees.

I work for panera, faggot

you got wawa in your username that probably confused him

vurry good

Pardon my ignorance, but what is a Wawa employee?

Pennsylvania 7/11s.

Quick chek all day

Alright who are the other 4 from North/central jersey

north checkin in. Quickchek is the bees knees.

Fawk yeah

Correction: eastern PA 7/11s. The Westside-bestside is Sheetz all the way!

Fair enough. I was a little vague.

Don't forget south Jersey!

Sheetz is like from a utopian future where gas stations aren't scary

PawPaw Hut, FTW.

they are way more badass than 7/11s sir. please.

Meh.

Ronnie B said they have awesome hoagies. He was joking right?

No, everyone is obsessed with Wawa sandwiches for some reason. They aren't that good.

they are just amazed like Mitt Romney when they push buttons and a sandwich comes out

The gas station wawa

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It's like Panera Bread but you can get gas there too.

Your comment is why I still visit this message board.

Ant strikes me as a guy that appeals more to Sheetz employees.

because nothing says spontaneous fun like getting beaten and strangled by a deranged alcoholic with domestic abuse charges.

She didn't see it coming. Thats basically spontaneous.

I'm sure that she figured out the 7th kick to the ribs was coming after the 6th

This whole situation is so fucked.

To be fair they did order pizza and watch Seinfeld reruns a lot.

He's just out for some spontaneous fun...

Lookin for Ha-ha's and hee-hees, so to speak. Just a guy who realizes ya never know what tomorrow's gonna bring, so live like today's your last, am I right gang?

Live free or die soon?

Life free and die soon...after not living free because of impeding incarceration.

Focking, socking!

how many old motherfuckers did you have to swipe through to get to his? fucking great man.

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Half of the O&A fans are truckers, and the other half have IQs above 150.

I'm a lawyer with a CDL so maybe I'm in that weird middle of the Venn Diagram?

CDL .... Lawyer .... Venn Diagrams .... Lookit Mr. Smarty here.

idk where you fall, but I'm sure there are dead hookers in your basement.

I can barely even get the door closed.

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Brilliant.

/u/anthonycumiashow, comment?

Did your fake profile have photos of an 18 year old white transgender, and did you swipe right? This could turn into quite a saga if you match with him.

[deleted]

pics were too old, too dark, too voluptuous

BOO. Keep trying.

Use younger, whiter, and fatherless girls.

Fucking great man. Can you locate Norton too? He said he tried Tinder but sucked at it so maybe his profile is still up.I know it's going to be a bit harder given that he lives in a heavily populated area but he's also in his late 40s so.His apartment is/was in "Trump towers" but maybe a local could pin-point the right address. Oh and while you're in the area find Lynsi's tinder, she's in her early 30s probably.

true hero or stalker.

Spontaneous fun =- Throwing on Columbo RIGHT after an episode of The Honeymooners.

Does the profile state he's seeking women or "women"?

hahahaha

Spontaneous fun. Read: unexpected uppercuts and random rib stompings.

Back to being a regular, miserable, lonely piece of shit like the rest of us. He'll never fuck a young model or a regional TV personality ever again. I love it.

One time he asked for pasta and meat sauce, but only got egg noodles and ketchup. He gets to live the rest of his life a schnook.

He used to bet twenty, thirty grand at Borgata and then he'd either blow the winnings in a week or go to the sharks to pay back the bookies.

Hah... winnings.

What kinda meat sauce?

2 miles away? You wouldn't happen to have a dress and a tiny penis, would you?

Well I don't have a dress....

There was a dress, SOMETHIN ABOUT A DRESS..

Hey babe, it's Chippah from Tindahs.

Stawp sendin me messages askin to be my fawkin girlfriend.

Holy shit. And that poor fucking cat being exploited for child rape.

I legitimately worry about Beav's wellbeing.

He's the only reason I don't want The Compound doused in gasoline and lit on fire in the middle of the night.

I worry about Beavs asshole.

:(

Who knew Anwar Sadat owned a muscle car?

Wine, Dinner, Movies, pegging.

Does ''spontaneous fun'' mean a black eye or a cracked rib?

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Awww shit, Tranpa just keeps getting sadder and sadder.

everyone needs to tweet this to colin, vos and jimmy at the VERY least. they might get a real kick out of it (I know anthony wont)

That dumb racing suit pose gave me douche chills. If he ever runs out of money he has no chance of banging higher than a 3.

I wouldn't be surprised if he reunited with his first wife in a good 5-7 years.

She's dead?

...exactly.

When did she die?Did he talk about it on the air?

:(

"Pocono" in the background. Not Daytona, or NASCAR.... But the Poconos.

If only there was a Bud Light banner to really drive the white trash point home.

So??? Where'd you swipe?

Always sad when you see a man on Tindr that should be on OurTime.

Maybe I've been in the Tinder world for so long that I'm numb to the patheticness, but this doesn't bother me. Old guy with money flaunting it on his profile to get young dates, normal sounding description, honest about his age. For the kind of guy Ant is, this is actually dignified.

I can't wrap my head around tinder even with people my age. Then again, I also still scowl when couples tell me they met online...

I know a girl who has more sex than a prostitute, all for free, because she's basically addicted to the attention

I will not disrespect your mother by asking if it's her.

thanks for sharing this unrelated info, you must be a blast at parties.

That's just not smart business.

You sound upset that she's not fucking you.

I'd feel pretty dumb if I fucked up a perfectly good marriage over some attention-seeking slut.

Anthony is the complete opposite of spontaneous fun. He sits at home all day drinking, beating 20 something year old girls, and watching reruns of Seinfeld. And occasionally poker night with a bunch of aarp fucks.

The "spontaneous fun" part is really what makes me want to toss my computer out the window.

"He's a man of leisure" "yeesss "

Was expecting Grinder and a much worse profile.

now that you mention it, somebody should check grinder

Look for Anth, Tranth, or White Human and age 69

Steve McDragQueen

I didn't realize the Time to Make the Donuts guy was so young.

OP, did you happen upon this while browsing tinder or are did you make a fake profile and park down the street from his house? Either way, thank you for your service.

Sign up for Tinder, spoof your location, adjust the age... And there you go

eww

The gift that keeps giving

In the first pic, Ant has Chim Chim and Spritle in the trunk.

... and Trixie in the crib with Pops raping his face.

What an out-of-touch fuckin dork.

Someone should make a parody one with pictures that more accurately represent his day to day life.

Hanging out with his cool friends, his non loser family, screaming YEAAAAA drunkenly after attacking a woman.

ok what does the Bud Light have written on it... I'd swear by first glance it says "trannies...." but it CANT be

I just figured it out, it says "Travis is Gay."

It really does look like it says "Trannies is Gay", but that sounds like a sentence writted by bobo.

It says Travis is Gay

Hahaha Poor Ant just wants to be in his 30's again.

The 80's were a fun time.

lol lying about his age, we all know he's 57.

This is fake. He did not mention or have 5 photos of a pool

No. I refuse to believe he posted that on Tinder. lmao

These little bird legs and house slippers will surely fool the ladies into thinking he's the rugged outdoorsy type: http://i.imgur.com/k4Hfb28.jpg

Its so nice of that mans grandson to let him drive his car.

atv riding with "boat shoes" is especially old manish and hilarious at the same time.

notice he's going with the Stahlhelm look as well? always was a fan of the period.

Are those seriously the best photos he could find of himself?

Is this part of his new "turning over a new leaf" stage or is he still looking to rape 15 year olds?

ugh "wine, dinner" = "i'm such a foodie", racing small-dick-cars, and of course showing off a cute cat to show what a nice sensitive guy he is and totally woman-friendly

Erock, comment?

Wine, Guinness, trannies, spontaneous cum

Looks to be 82 years old in that first pic

Good profile, I bet he gets tons of matches.

Should have put "Drinking bud lite, abusing xanex, and watching Seinfeld reruns" down

Lol. I love his choice of pics

"Shit is jamming, man. Start down low with a 350 cube, three and a quarter horsepower, 4 speed, 4:10 gears, 10 coats of competition orange, hand rubbed lacquer with a huplane manifold. Full fuckin race cams."

If only he ended up like Todd.

He's got coke and he's got cash in that floor safe. If we leave without it we're fucking idiots.

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If this isn't real I'll be so disappointed.

He always gets pissed when ppl tell him to grow his facial hair back,but he uses mostly pics of him with it to pick up girls? I do not understand this creep

:( this is sad

No gun pics?

That would be false advertising.

A bunch of pictures of a middle-aged man in his house, etc. with no one else around except a cat? I detest Trant, but even I felt a smidge of pity while looking at those pics.

What a depressing profile, what a sad life. I bet the ladies are scratching and biting each other to be the first to get to him, though! Yeah right...

He doesn't have the Billy Bad Ass gun hanging out in this pic. Now that woud get some 'Murica pussy.

Please tell me you're catfishing him.

All things considered this is a fantastic tinder profile

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So we know that Ant at least fits the profile of what OP is looking for on Tinder.

[deleted]

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They made a parody (documentary) of Ant!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3CoIgQ4ZeKc

Weird flashy racing suit and a Shelby Mustang he probably bought off the lot at AutoNation? YUCK.

It is pretty sad, actually. The man rails against marriage and sees it as being shackled to someone who will inevitably turn into an old woman with a boy haircut.

But, I think that's missing the point of spending your life with someone. When you choose not to, this is what happens to a lot of old guys.

You become an elderly bachelor with creepy pictures on Tinder. "Look at me, I've got money! Ignore the fact that I'm 30 years older than you and am pretty much a 2 looks wise. "

He's got a lot of money to spend, but no one worth sharing it with.

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Why doesnt this stupid fuck just get hookers?He knows the bitches that fuck him are only in it for the money so what difference would it make.Lol how much has this guy fallen.I bet he regrets not trying to keep nicolini

fake

Pardon my ignorance, but what is a Wawa employee?

Your comment is why I still visit this message board.

I work for panera, faggot

:(

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I dunno, Senna looked more European than Ant

Ant strikes me as a guy that appeals more to Sheetz employees.

A little more extra crispy at the end.

hate to be THAT guy, but Senna got hit by a tire, Lauda had the fire..

Senna wasn't burned you silly goose.

Meh.