Things actual tough guys don't say:

44  2019-09-13 by StuntPeckah

"I'm just an actual tough guy."

They also don't obsess about Twitter or about getting the absolute last word no matter what.

14 comments

1  ThePepsiColaRapist 2019-09-13

Tough guys definitely say things like Oopsie Doodles, and speak like fat diabetic black woman though, right?

1  StuntPeckah 2019-09-13

I'm thinking not so much. What you describe sounds more like an unfried lump of cheese curd sired by a rodeo clown.

1  AntifaMilwaukee 2019-09-13

This is the kind of language a bar fighter who has stood up to skinhead punks uses, child. Not a fat deadbeat who plays with star wars toys.

1  eyesinrain 2019-09-13

Any man who is the son of a Rodeo Clown/Windmill electrician is a tough guy in my book, child.

1  BigAppleRanchRep 2019-09-13

Any man who is the son of a Rodeo Clown/Windmill electrician is a tough guy in my book, child.

1  StuntPeckah 2019-09-13

/Windmill electrician

Well...why didn't ya say so? Pardon me while I backpedal and hide my embarrassment.

1  EasilyForgotten1138 2019-09-13

Do they block people different opinions, encourage beating women who have a different ideology, or post unflattering, sweaty gym selfies?

1  StuntPeckah 2019-09-13

I don't know man. That's a tough one dude. I'm kind of on the fence about it.

This man you describe, if someone took his daughter would he go all Liam Neeson and stop at nothing to the ends of the Earth to shower her with love again?

1  EasilyForgotten1138 2019-09-13

Well, this is strictly hypothetical, you understand, but if someone took this - again, strictly hypothetical - person's daughter, I imagine that he would more likely post winsome, attention baiting things about it on Twitter, which is the true love of his life.

Hypothetically.

1  StuntPeckah 2019-09-13

Twitter

Grody.

No, tough guys don't consider typing an action. Especially well after the fact.

1  GagMeWithASpewwn 2019-09-13

You’re telling me tough guys don’t say “oopsie doodles”?

1  fatprick_s_tomlinson 2019-09-13

Oh, sweetie. No.

1  OutlawMemer 2019-09-13

[licks brain]

Well, MAYBE a tough guy would say that, but the type of tough guy into dismembering corpses.

1  OnArefugee 2019-09-13

The fact that someone would say that shows that they need external validation. They may be strong or study karate but they'll never have the mental fortitude or or certainty of purpose to excel and be truly "tough".