I’ve really done it now fellas, feeling a little bit like a retard.

5  2019-06-01 by Slothjew

I live in a pretty nice building, it’s got a pool on the roof. Yesterday, I was drinking all day, started doing some lines, and this absolute monstrosity ogre troll gargoyle of a girl started hitting on me. I was absolutely hammered and let her suck my dick. Busted in her mouth and face, it was kinda fun at the time.

Problem is, I have a really hot gf who is at my place all the time and this fat bitch lives in my building. Feeling slightly guilty, but I’m not a pussy so that’s not the issue, the issues is now I gotta potentially see this bowling ball of a human potentially with my girl.

My one saving grace is that this girl is so disgusting that even if she ever mentioned it to my girl almost don’t think she would even believe I would do it.

I’ll throw this monster off the 6th floor if she says some shit.

18 comments

1  TamaInoino 2019-06-01

Sounds like you're making some good decisions there, pal.

1  Slothjew 2019-06-01

It’s been a rough morning

1  LoouisCuCkpartDeux 2019-06-01

No one likes a braggart

1  Slothjew 2019-06-01

Sir. You must really like disgusting women or somehow be envious of me being a drunk and a drug addict.

1  DrSvarheeny 2019-06-01

You have a girlfriend? Pics or gtfo

1  Slothjew 2019-06-01

I couldn’t do that to her

1  DrSvarheeny 2019-06-01

You're a very decent man. You're also a good man for "letting" the gargoyle blow you. You gave her a real treat

1  Slothjew 2019-06-01

I guess I am a pretty good guy, thanks

1  CorradoSocrates 2019-06-01

Not sure I believe all this, friend.

1  Slothjew 2019-06-01

Oh it is sadly all true

1  lawyerherelistenup 2019-06-01

When I was about 22, I was dating a pretty hot chick. My arch enemy girl at the time was this cute faced but slightly overweight girl. She FucKing hated me bad. I ran into her one night at a bar and ended up back at her place and I fucked her. Once I sobered up I panicked a bit cause this was a chick who hated me and I figured would relish in telling my gf what happened. At the time, I remember thinking my only defense was "she said what?!? You know she hates me and now she's telling you we SLEPT together?!?".

My gf never found out.

1  Slothjew 2019-06-01

This makes me feel slightly better

1  Slothjew 2019-06-01

My main fear is running into the fat one while my girl is with me and being in an incredibly awkward situation.

1  lawyerherelistenup 2019-06-01

I'd just act like you don't know her. And if fatty pipes up, brand her "crazy." But I know what you're worried about, she blurts out some intimate detail about you or your apartment that legitimizes her claim.

1  Slothjew 2019-06-01

Yea exactly, and this bitch seems sorta crazy. She just text me asking if know had her remote controller. What the fuck is she talking about?

1  lawyerherelistenup 2019-06-01

Maybe go talk to her about something you heard about her and "your twin brother" and how that needs to stay private.

1  Slothjew 2019-06-01

Yea I might have to. This bitch needs to understand that we are not friends and she can’t text me.

1  LaurenDoingChin-Ups 2019-06-01

Carry a candy bar with you at all times. If you run into the fat girl, give her the candy to shut her up.