Reminder: When you cheat at marathons wear a hoodie with a kangaroo pocket.

1  2019-09-30 by BLAPPY_HATES_FATRICK

Be sure the jog wear is casual so you can mix in with the spectators. Who'd think you'd jog 400 miles/year wearing a sweat trap? If possible learn the camera locations ahead of time. Grunt and sprint when you see one. During training, posts lots of selfies with your sweat soaked mug. People will be inspired and you'll get retweets!

Also, be fat so you can act like you have a goal in mind and don't day drink on Twitter.

4 comments

If you don't have an oversized pocket how are you supposed to carry your lemonade and chocolate chip cookies, child?

Get a 2nd better wife to buy them.

If you don't have an oversized pocket how are you supposed to carry your lemonade and chocolate chip cookies, child?

Be sure to eat enough bratwurst for 8 Belorussian families the night before the race.