• a writer who can’t write
• a barfighter who can’t fight
• an avid runner who somehow manages to be fat
• a husband whose wife doesn’t acknowledge that she’s married to him
• a progressive who doesn’t care about anyone but himself
• a narcissist without the charm or charisma to make his self-indulgence tolerable
• a person who doesn’t care what we think yet lets us live rent-free in his head day in, day out

Am I missing anything?