he must have a new egg

Maybe it needs re-charging.

It opens up and you put your dick in it.

He was trying to pretend it was a Tenga egg.

He wants to put D size batteries up his ass?

Hahha HL shit *felony strangulation

I about felony strangled my cock looking at her

Anthony, why don’t you post the mugshot you took after beating up your girlfriend and make jokes about that? This fucking loser is still LARPING as a law abiding proper American citizen

You should reply to his tweet with that pic

Done and done

You mean the one he used as his business logo for nearly 2 years?

Another brilliant business decision by Keith. No foresight about inquiries from guests or whatever media shows an interest in the show.

“What’s that mugshot all about?”

“I bit and stomped out my 87 pound child bride.”

When she wants to do homework instead of watch Goodfellas again you just got to choke her out.

It's so, so funny. He thinks it's one of those "iconic" mugshots, like Hendrix or Sinatra's.

He's saying battery in the physical assault sense. Like he'd bite her hand as Joe smashes her face with a frying pan.

you finally made yourself useful

He needs lots of batteries for his anal toys and assumes everyone else needs some also.

Probably 'sounding'. Weird people are putting AA and AAA batteries in their pee holes now for mental illness reasons I'm assuming.

He's still hilarious.

If you don't get it then it's your problem, buddy.

An artist doesn’t explain his art.

And an Artie doesn't retain his nose.

nana threw it all away so that he could post nonsense like this.

I'm beginning to really dislike that greasy wop.

Fake news. Profile pic over 13, not Cumia approved.

I’d put it in her mouth.

Too real? Is this the kind of humor they appreciate in nasa control rooms?

He got arrested for battery.

I've noticed people who consider themselves or have comedian in their bio, enjoy just posting quick quips to feed their ego or convince themselves they are putting out content. Their flocks usually smash like without even thinking about what they've actually just witnessed so it's a win, win. You see this a lot with the top tier political humorists who just respond with "oh, like yourself?".

Ha ha ha hooo leeee shiiiii

Her face is kind of egg-shaped

Ew, he’s turning into an old gossipy yenta, expecting us to know who the fuck he’s talking about.

We don’t know who that is, Anthony. We don’t spend all day watching E! and reading tabloids. At least give us a hint. Or don’t, nobody gives a shirt about you or your gay obscure references.

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2 likes

Imagine being paid millions of dollars to laugh all day with some of the funniest people on the planet and meet hundreds of celebrities and then give it all up because you find ethnic crime statistics to be more entertaining.

Ant puts more effort into trying to be hilarious on Twitter than he puts into his paywall-protected show. It's obvious that it means way, way more to him than the show does. He spends hours and hours each day scouring the web for retarded news stories to comment on, but puts maybe three minutes of prep work into his actual show.