Opie & Joe Show 7/12/19
122 2019-07-12 by SpaceEdgesDom
Show opens with Joe's tribute band's cover of RATM's cover of Street Fighting Man
"Good morning, lampchops!" Opie begins by talking about how awesome it is that they get to play whatever the fawwk they want sniff Joe suggests that they start playing more of his cover band on the air. Opie says he's all in wit da 2U
Jimmy is late, guess why? Some ssscccccuuumbaagggg Uber driver motherfucked him! He shows up 20 minutes after the show starts and immediately asks if they can go to break so he can tinkle. Says he ate half of an egg last night, so expect some gassers LOL!
Opie tells everyone that Brother Anthony will be calling in later to plug his band Rotgut's new song "Niggers, Am I Right?"
It's breakfast ordering time! Opie needs MELK ASAP or else he's gonna pass out. Jim is a little fat girl, so he just orders a packet of yellow mustard. Joe has a heaping of cud that he chews throughout the show
A big time star from a huge movie that just grossed 80 bajillion dollars will be in later. No one in studio has seen the movie, so this will be thrilling.
We come back from break to big slurping and chewing noises all around. The b-b-b-boys berate the interns for screwing up the breakfast orders. It takes up 45 minutes of air time
Brother Anthony calls in. His nervous energy is palpable. Lots of fake laughing and ha-ha holy shitting. Opie plays Rotgut's new song "Kill All Spooks." Joe says he wrote it, which isn't true but Anthony agrees and nervously laughs away his tears.
Anthony brings up the blood oath that he and Joe made when they were 6 years old that, if one of them ever made it, then they would pay for the other one's existence for all eternity. Anthony thanks Joe for buying him a McMansion and says if the roles were reversed, then he'd do the same for Joe.
After the verbal cock-sucking between brothers is over, we move onto the Epstein thing. Everyone only has a passing knowledge of what even happened. Opie says "Lotta fawkin problems on that island." Jim makes sex jokes LOL! Joe says its cuz Trump and 4D chess or whatever the fuck. They bring in gay little intern Sam, who is equally as clueless. He somehow connects it to something about Vince McMahon because of course he would.
Huge star in studio to talk about huge movie. No one in studio has seen it or even heard of it. Opie says the guy is "blowing up" on "the twitter." Sam was going to watch huge movie but there was a rasslin show in town and he wanted to ask Nikki Bella what John Cena's cock looks like.
Jim asks if they can go to break again because he has to tinkle. That's our Jim LOL! He haha cuts a oh ho ho gasser a hee hee hee FARTS ARE FUNNY! Everyone is disgusted. This is bad radio.
They come back from break and Sam is talking about some gay wrestling shit. How did this guy worm his way onto fourth mic? Joe mentions how all the wrestlers these days look like little kids. At a towering 6'1" and 245 pounds of pure testosterone, he'd wipe the floor with these pencil neck geeks. MAGA!
It's 9:59 and the b-b-b-boys leave a cloud of dust as they fly out the door.
Time for Sam's shit show. The girls dish on hip hop, sneakers and reality TV. Some black guy is in studio. The Miz shows up. It's awful. Could you imagine Sam Roberts becoming an actual radio host? Ha!
I don't know if this Opie & Joe bit has legs.
28 comments
1 gunstore 2019-07-12
Please never stop doing this
1 AIIenRicketts 2019-07-12
On the other hand, please stop doing this.
1 TheElDan 2019-07-12
It’s a tough one, man.
1 SpaceEdgesDom 2019-07-12
Eh, I can see both sides.
1 ThatsSoOverrated 2019-07-12
Here's the thing: Little Anthony might need Ope to steer the ship, and he has his little voices and jokes, but Joe has a mind for business. He would have hustled and made connections and gotten comics and interesting guest ALL THE TIME. The show would still be a hit and everybody would be making big money.
If only Ant hadn't stolen your opportunity, huh, Joe?
1 DigitechLooper 2019-07-12
The Opie and Joe show operates with MILITARY efficiency.
1 of_lower_stock 2019-07-12
Let's call it Opie and Josephine.
1 snargfursk 2019-07-12
You're doing the Lord's work.
1 OpiesInstantReplay 2019-07-12
Oh, buddy. This is got more than just legs.
1 SamRobertsSucks- 2019-07-12
This definitely has legs. Thank you for your service.
1 PhishInVa2 2019-07-12
I fucking hate middle of the road Jimmy
1 redditsipowillsuck 2019-07-12
Agreed. Either go back to being funny, or kill yourself.
1 Wolosocu 2019-07-12
I'd listen.
1 PhishInVa2 2019-07-12
$1000 an EPISODE
1 daveyistheman 2019-07-12
Can we get some guys on this sub to cos-play this scenario and upload it to YouTube?
1 halfslices 2019-07-12
Is there a support group for people who used to like a show that was EXACTLY this but now looking back it's clearly terrible?
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Was it just a quantity thing? It was 20 hours a week so we tolerated mediocrity?
1 tstein2398 2019-07-12
I think for a lot of us it just became background noise for when we were at work or were driving, etc. The same goes for JRE and just about everything else I listen to. For the most part it's all garbage with a few great interviews and good moments. O&A was a lot funnier back in the WNEW and early Satellite days but up until the end it had its moments like tequila and donuts day, Di's internship, great appearances by Patrice, Colin, Bobby, and Vos. For the most part though it was just white noise to me and I didn't notice how shit it was.
1 Lasagna_Hat 2019-07-12
I feel like the last 3 or 4 years were this garbage. Maybe 3 times a week there would be a genuinely funny bit
If there was a remotely funny bit, Opie would drive it into the ground. Bob Levy calling Lady Di a man, Bobo "calling in" every single day for 3 weeks, daily studio rants...
They stared at the clock until they could leave. No effort. No substance. Just noise.
1 wurmspurmtsssss 2019-07-12
As long add it took my AIDS riddled brain to read and comprehend, it felt like i was back in 2014. Thank you for your service.
1 ConflictAddict 2019-07-12
Applause
1 betterchef1127 2019-07-12
Get Jesse Ventura on the Opie & Joe show please
1 schmuckOnWheels 2019-07-12
I like it. Tell me more.
1 D0WhatN0w 2019-07-12
Do the one where Opie gets mad a Joe for loudly slurping child spit while they are on the air and Joe alpha males him into submission. Then Jimmy sucks his cock to settle the tensions.
1 redditsipowillsuck 2019-07-12
Joetober
1 yanggang707 2019-07-12
I love that in this world Anthony is slightly better off
1 TacolasCage 2019-07-12
God damn this is funny
1 fudgicle2018 2019-07-12
In which season does Joe come out then stop talking for six years?
1 deep_legal_shit 2019-07-12
got me good