I once had a dream that I was in the Foo Fighters at a live show. I'm not really a fan and don't know how to play any of their songs so I fucked up hard and they were really mean to me about it. The first thing I said to my ex when I woke up was "The Foo Fighters are a bunch of dicks."

Go on...

I have a recurring dream that I keep a black bear in my house but I'm afraid of it and I want it to leave and it won't. I always sneak around it and open the doors and throw shit outside to draw it's attention but it won't get out.

That's the manifestation of your latent homosexuality. You're afraid of it yet you long for it. Deep down you know that despite your best efforts to evict it, the desire to be sexually mauled by a "Black Bear" will continue to be an ever present occupant of your subconcious.

You've got me kinda fucked up here... well I guess I'm a fag, gang. Who wants to jizz in me?

I'm sorry to be the one to break this to you, sir.

I was thinking if it meant anything, maybe the bear represented my alcoholism, but I honestly can't dispute what you said. The only thing that makes me think I'm not gay is that I love pussy, I feel like sticking anything up my butt would result in my death and the thought of having sex with a man is nauseating to me, but that's no excuse, really. I'm gay. I'm going to completely change my life. Thank you. Wanna be gay with me?

I'm glad I've been able to help you. Unfortunetly, I'm only gay in the sense that I regulary post here.

You can always see if Joe will let you tag along the next time he goes "bear hunting" at The Ranch though.

I might even become a tranny. I'm Canadian so the government will probably pay for tits and hormones. Then I can make Anthony fall in love with me, he'll move me into the Compound and I'll let his faggy cat outside to hopefully get run over.

Hey lemme get some of that butthole

Go on...

I had a dream I met joe at a bar. It was the Blue Oyster

This is Lynchian. The worm will soon be haunting your reality.

Well, he invited him. It is not The Worm's custom to go where he is not wanted.

I once dreamt that I was on the J&S show. I was trying to be polite because I thought it was real so mid conversation I dropped some dumb Chipism and Jim and Sam were literally on the floor in hysterics. I tried laughing along but I was thinking "I gotta get outta here."

Also once dreamt about Dawn and her big tits.

Cue Norton’s repetitive joke that the barstool was upside down