You didn't get food poisoning, child. You just eat and drink too much, ya big fat pig.

1  2019-09-18 by fatty-patty-

23 comments

Good lord. Can you imagine Niki just standing there amidst piles of toys and unsold books watching this slob blorp up his third Chalupa Cravings Box of the day?

Pat for months - “Nikki, I NEED you to pay for a lawyer so I can get my twitter account back so I can promote my books. The sales along will triple what we spent!”

Pat Today - “I have the shits, I must tell the internet all the details!”

Money well wasted, child.

He sure is working on those "algorithms"

That blue tick will be back any day now

Imagine feeling the need to tweet this. Why does he think people want/need to know he has the shits?

It's more valuable than his usual output, I'll give him that.

He just leads a boring stupid life, for him having an irregular shit is something of value.

Pat's just trying to get an op/ed in The Diarrhea Times

Remember, he paid money to get his twitter back to tell people he had the shits. And Pat says WE’RE the losers!

This fat faggot has probably never been to the Bellagio, if he had he would have known that his asshole would have had to be synchronized to music for this terrible joke to even make sense. In closing, Patrick is an active coprophilic pedophile.

Let’s hope his next ailment is synchronized to TAPS.

This fat fuck eats the shittiest, most unhealthy food known to man. And as if that's not enough, he feels the need to share with his "fans" that he has a case of the shits.

What a fucking weirdo

It’s not food poisoning, fatty, you’re gorging yourself on fucking Taco Bell. Eating 10 chalupas is gonna give you the shits, stupid.

All his little tales are so unoriginal. The getting the shits from Taco Bell thing is the hackiest unamusing story or lie anyone could ever tell.

Next he'll make the super original joke about having trouble putting ikea furniture together.

*Did you ever try to open a bag of airplane peanuts and realize another man is raising your daughter? What...is...the deal? *

Taco Bell

Why even bother going to the gym?

Oh yeah, he doesn't go there to lose weight, he just wants people to think he works out so everyone know that he's a "tough guy".

Listen child, I just did 5 minutes on the treadmill, that deserves a treat

What's funny is the closest taco Bell is like 15 minutes away. Must have had a hankering.

I'm sure fatass has worn away the glossy layer of his phone screen where the Grubhub shortcut is located.

I wonder why he's tweeting about himself when his wife must have had food poisoning too. Unless...

She only eats fried chicken and watermelon, the same as her lovers.

I hope it's stomach cancer.