Have you ever ran into a co-worker that turned into a junkie?

33  2019-04-16 by OkaySeriouslyBro

This post is not for any of the crackhead, methhead, or smack junkie top moderators/moderators/users, as I'm sure you'd be on the other side of this issue. Hopefully any base alcoholics/potheads/cokeheads can relate to the following:

You ever run into an old-coworker out in public, but they're a junkie now? Hair and clothes are dirty, skin just look pockmarked like Anthony, they're nervously rubbing their forearms. You have a brief conversation about what both of you have been up to (their response: "oh you know, this and that") but can tell they're not listening and are just waiting for the moment.

The moment to go "so hey, do you have like $20 you can loan me?" Which becomes the issue. Yes, I absolutely have $20 to loan you. But then I think of the Cousins Maine Lobster truck.

https://www.cousinsmainelobster.com/menu/?location=los_angeles&type=truck

As you can see, the Cousins Maine Lobster truck periodically parks in Downtown Los Angeles. There, you can get a Connecticut or Maine Lobster Roll (Connecticut is superior btw), plus tater tots and a drink, for $20.25 before tax.

So, back to the issue: do I hand this junkie that I used to kinda know the money and hope they put it towards ramen noodles, or do I come up with an excuse like "man, times are tough for everyone" and go treat myself to a lunch of lobster? Do I help this person acquire the one thing they care about more than anything in the world, or indulge in a luxury purchase of a lunch that costs 3x the price of a Jimmy Johns sub?

Man, times are tough for everyone. Great catching up with you, though!

37 comments

1  bonniesretardsister 2019-04-16

You're never getting the money back so don't give him anything unless he'll suck your cock for it.

1  PeeSoup3030 2019-04-16

Even then. What he does a $5 job?

1  bonniesretardsister 2019-04-16

Okay, he has to eat his ass too.

1  SlightFresnel 2019-04-16

Eh even if they say they will, there's no guarantee. That's a $500 lesson I won't forget.

1  Anthonysmcmansion 2019-04-16

"so, back to the issue: do I hand this junkie that I used to kinda know the money and hope they put it towards ramen noodles, or do I come up with an excuse like "man, times are tough for everyone" and go treat myself to a lunch of lobster? Do I help this person acquire the one thing they care about more than anything in the world, or indulge in a luxury purchase of a lunch that costs 3x the price of a Jimmy Johns sub?"

​

if you're a real degenerate, you give him money and go shoot smack with him

Other than that, tell him to fuck off and eat your lobster

1  thrillated 2019-04-16

The Stinks Option

1  Subeckk 2019-04-16

I think this post was just a way for you to brag about your taste in food trucks. Faggot.

1  Al_Descartz_420 2019-04-16

Vic Henley would be proud

1  strappedjammypac 2019-04-16

  • Do Opie's show
  • Replenish lobster truck
  • Be funny

1  blockablockablow 2019-04-16

This should’ve been a picture of a gay fuckin fish sandwich and nasty balled up hash browns on Instagram but this fag had to write essay to really come off as smart and successful as possible

1  thrillated 2019-04-16

Hey man, big spender here is going to have his $20 lobster meal and he'll let us know about it. If we don't like it, we can go kick rocks!

1  insertclevereference 2019-04-16

Reads like a scene from a one man show script he's been working on his whole life but is too embarrassed to perform, for obvious reasons.

1  stinkypussay 2019-04-16

There was a mature student on my college course. Nice guy, smart dude in his 40's retraining to change career... About 4/5 years later I see him getting arrested outside Tesco's for stealing booze.. he was a mess, looked fully homeless.. and he looked up and recognised me and all I could do was give him the "hey what you gonna do" shrug of the shoulders and carried on my way to meet my coke dealer!

1  thrillated 2019-04-16

Like looking in a mirror from the future, my man.

1  crookedmile 2019-04-16

I was at a Halloween party a few years back and a guy I knew from HS started talking me up like this. I was good friends with him back in the day, but this was like 16 years ago. Long story short, he says he has a kid now and is hurting for cash, I told him I just got laid off to get out of it. Later, the girl he was with accused me of wearing blackface for my Baseball Furies costume. Interesting night

1  thrillated 2019-04-16

That is a great anecdote.

1  McGowan9 2019-04-16

Instead of the "Sorry man, times are tight" spiel, why not just laugh in his/her face and say "No" with a tone of utter incredulity? Try it, it's fun!

For an added bonus, buy your lobster sandwich, take a big bite in front of him, grimace and throw the whole thing in the garbage. Then wave goodbye.

1  easterntraveler 2019-04-16

Hahaha who hurt you?

1  McGowan9 2019-04-16

Huh?

1  myRrribz 2019-04-16

That actually sounds kind of mean, no?

1  LoouisCuCkpartDeux 2019-04-16

Brit fag, you would do no such thing

1  McGowan9 2019-04-16

You're right. I would never eat from a food truck.

1  RacistPigeon 2019-04-16

That’s the good thing about living on the coast of Maine. For 20 bucks I can buy straight off the boat, and have enough lobsters to make about eight of those sandwiches.

1  SuperTubsPeterson 2019-04-16

They'll never repay you. They won't even remember that you loaned them anything a day later.

1  tjdon 2019-04-16

My first boss worked for his uncle. I just found out he’d been arrested for fentanyl and was getting arrested and sued by everyone. Including his uncle and the guys that bought his house from auction. Turns out he stole hundreds of thousands of dollars from his uncle and former colleagues so he was a junkie trying to sell a Bentley an old vette and a nice boat before they got repo’d by his uncle. Never saw it coming but he’d gotten away with being a junkie for years because he had a shitload of money.

1  wicked_crayfish 2019-04-16

Guess I forgot to laugh.

1  oneamongst2113 2019-04-16

I don't give a fuck dude

1  TheKingOfNeverLose 2019-04-16

One of my coworkers is currently facing jail time for selling dope. They are trying to get him on manslaughter because some woman OD’d on his heroin. He obviously wasn’t a model citizen but he was an alright guy, otherwise. I’m sure he never intended to kill anyone. He looked terrible last time I saw him, which was about a year before his arrest.

1  brmlb 2019-04-16

what about a junkie that turned into a co-worker?

https://twitter.com/russmeneve/status/1116725592601264130?s=21

1  Pizza2TheFace 2019-04-16

Food trucks are for hipster buttholes. Always some rip off of some trendy regional food from thousands of miles away that isnt even 10% as good. As someone who is also from the area, just hit up a taco truck and save 15$ and have that friend take that money and introduce you to your first hit of heroin.

1  timallenonacid 2019-04-16

Don’t pay bums

I say this all the time and nobody listens. I simply can’t stress it enough.

If you pay bums, they will come back again and again. They hang around hotspots where they know humans have money, they nest in urban areas, they spread disease, they quickly multiply, they shit all over the place and worst of all, they become comfortable around humans and start approaching everyone and anyone expecting free money.

They are still wild animals The only thing you’re going to do when you pay a bum, is end up getting it put down or even worse get a human killed. Don’t pay bums. If you see a bum, chase it away or call your local PD, they will handle the situation.

With enough hard work, we can keep the bums in the forest where they belong.. protecting not only ourselves, but them as well.

work together, don’t pay bums

1  lawntoilet 2019-04-16

Your lips ta god's ears, pal.

1  anarchronism 2019-04-16

$20 to eat from a truck.

Sounds like your money's being wasted either way.

1  Kenn_Kennnerson 2019-04-16

I've never ran into a co-worker, but I have run into some co-workers from my past that have fallen on hard times.

1  CordouroyStilts 2019-04-16

Well which is it??

1  246h8 2019-04-16

Oddly enough, I came across 3 ex-coworkers that found me at my local watering hole. They asked me what I had been up to since I left my job in December.

As I explained I took a few months off work, I realized I was really drunk on a Tuesday night. They were all giving me the sad "he's drunk on a Tuesday night" look.

I realized I was that guy and I couldn't give less of a fuck. Those Boilermakers catch up with you, I tell ya what...

1  oooBeta_Libraeooo 2019-04-16

Yes. I just don't get that mentality. I drink and smoke weed a lot and used to do drugs daily and never let my life fall apart because of it. Never miss work, never late, never stole from friends or family. I think you just have to be a total selfish cunt to be a junkie, that's why I don't trust ANY of them.