One day my grandchildren will sit on my lap and I will recount tales of how during my youth I would claim that an irrelevant sci fi author fucks babies, and how my comrades in arms and I laughed by being mean to a man on the internet. Then I will drink whiskey and abuse them horrifically, cuz you know, alcoholism.

Im really bummed out that I cant share this with anyone in real life. I wish it was something I could bring up at work like sports or tv.

“Hey did you see that post last night about Joe’s wife as that serial killer hooker?”

“Yeah man that was hilarious!”