"Tony, it's Bonnie - I just wanted to call you quick to see if you got the outline I sent for the book about comedians explaining kitchen tools called Lemon Jester.
God dammit. I gotta go - Rich forgot to flush and my sister's in there playing with it again."
"Hey, it's Bonnie again - I sent you that 30-page treatment for the novel I was telling you about, the one about the woman who learns to cook at home called Sue Vide. I just wanted to make sure you were able to open the Word attachment.
Oh for fuck's sake she's out on the porch in her robe and twerking on the mailman again. I'll call you back."
"Hey Tony it's Bonnie again. I'm calling about my proposal for that novel about the vegan cowboy called Kale Rider. I haven't heard anything so I wanted to make sure your agent gave it to you.
I gotta go, there's an emergency with my sister - there's a rerun of Life Goes On on and she's having Strummy Time right there in the living room. I'll call you back."
12 comments
1 JimandFred 2019-03-20
I would pay to see this act.
1 TangerineReam 2019-03-20
WIDDOUT THA BEARD, IT'S HIM!
1 ellencakehorn 2019-03-20
One tit's lookin one way, one tit's lookin the other way, and you've got this retarded sister in the middle goin "Hey, whaddaya want from me?"
1 LieutenantTickles 2019-03-20
murse
1 Betamaxdromes 2019-03-20
You banging that thing?
1 throwbenny 2019-03-20
Settle down George
1 TearJuanOperator 2019-03-20
I heard Bonnie McFarlane wouldn't stop texting Bourdain book pitches so he finally offed himself.
1 ellencakehorn 2019-03-20
"How about a book of jokes called The One-Line Cook? Hang on I've got to call you back - my sister's swallowing her own tongue."
1 ellencakehorn 2019-03-20
"Hey Ton', I've got this great idea for a book about teaching my sister how to cook called Flour for Alger on.
Oh Christ, I'll call you right back - she's humping the bannister in front of company again."
1 ellencakehorn 2019-03-20
"Tony, it's Bonnie - I just wanted to call you quick to see if you got the outline I sent for the book about comedians explaining kitchen tools called Lemon Jester.
God dammit. I gotta go - Rich forgot to flush and my sister's in there playing with it again."
1 ellencakehorn 2019-03-20
"Hey, it's Bonnie again - I sent you that 30-page treatment for the novel I was telling you about, the one about the woman who learns to cook at home called Sue Vide. I just wanted to make sure you were able to open the Word attachment.
Oh for fuck's sake she's out on the porch in her robe and twerking on the mailman again. I'll call you back."
1 ellencakehorn 2019-03-20
"Hey Tony it's Bonnie again. I'm calling about my proposal for that novel about the vegan cowboy called Kale Rider. I haven't heard anything so I wanted to make sure your agent gave it to you.
I gotta go, there's an emergency with my sister - there's a rerun of Life Goes On on and she's having Strummy Time right there in the living room. I'll call you back."