I'm sure the speed limit is 90mph you literal red neck faggot.

52  2019-03-09 by alphadromes

82 comments

Only he and Joe Cumia would be maje a post like this.

Their similarities are striking. I wouldn't be surprised if Patrick has a younger brother who supports him so he can cosplay as a sci fi writer.

Patrick's family situation hasn't been talked about in any interviews I've seen. Of course I found one where he mentioned, as he put it, "the wife situation" but there are clues I'm looking into that he may be selling insurance still and then of course trying to find out what his girlfriend does for a living. It's tough though because I don't have a Facebook but in 10 pages of Googling the insurance company he still has on his Facebook page bio, there is no record of it. I'm not sure if selling insurance pays well but he claimed after community college, he went to Florida to sell it, met his future divorce, and then began selling it from home.

I'm also in correspondance with his literary agent, who is legit, trying to find out how much an advance he got and if it's going towards bullshit like this.

For someone who was so active on social media, once his Twitter accounts got banned, there really isn't anything left of him to Google.

Thank you for your service.

I bet he's in Arizona for a fucking Amway convention or something.

Can you link or explain the “wife situation”? I’ve tried to find it and I have no idea what’s going on. Gosh, I hope he’s ok!

This is the only public mention of "The Wife Situation" I am aware of at the moment: https://youtu.be/pXa4k-wOry4

I mean, it's 20 minutes but it's luckily within the first five. I wouldn't punish yourself like me unless you enjoying hating people as much as I do.

Searching back on this subreddit has been especially hard finding what the original posts were referencing his exwife having a black child and you have to remember that Patrick becoming a permanent member of this little enclave was not always such a popular idea in between now and the original Norm post where his account getting Permanently Suspended only took half an hour here on a Wendesday afternoon.

There has been a few posters who mention they have actually seen public files about his divorce or child support but I have not seen them.

By actually getting Patrick off Twitter, after actually having ~70,000 followers, his entire electronic footprint was erased. This makes Googling him extra painfully tedious which I enjoy.

A black child?! Oh my God, fuck Twitter for all this. God bless you by the way, you are a saint!

I cannot thank you enough for what you are doing.

i love weaponised autism

He is a salesman for United Healthcare. He renewed his contract February 1.

This information is readily available on NAIC, so in case Fat Fuck wants to report this, it's public records of a regulated industry.

Does United Healthcare hire rapists now? Because that's what I'm hearing now..

We should ask them.

I'm sure it's no thing to them to shitcan a 1099 contractor.

They hired you too?

To be fair, some teenage girls might as well

It’s definitely getting weirder the more we find out about both of them.

I think the majority of this country is full of retarded narcissists. These two fatsos just fell into our laps.

It's bananas how these 2 are one in the same, but are desperately wanting to appeal to different crowds.

... & how the all-accepting unity of this sub has almost brought them together. They'll be gay-married by the end of it, it's a sitcom waiting to happen.

The Clod Couple

doing 90 .... you just know how bad he wanted to say doing 88mph like doc brown but couldn't find a way to swing it without being such a faggot that even he knew it was lame as fuck.

He wanted to say 88 because he's a literal Nazi

Fatty Arbuckle had a better profile.

I thought this Andy Richter.

Simple mistake, but one of those two has a wife

Hope he pulls a Ryan Dunn so he can spend eternity smeared across an embankment.

Jesus Christ, this guy is posting nonstop about Scottsdale like it’s fucking Florence. Settle down fatso

Yeah but one things for sure, his life can't possibly suck. Look at all this proof of how much fun he's having!

A-HAHA-HAAAA HOHLEE SHIIIIIT!!!

Jews love it.

It's the Boca Raton of the Western US.

Guess who had unlimited late night apps at Arizona's hottest Ruby Tuesday's? Not you, child.

But that chop house had REAL SILVERWARE!

Cute BMW convertible. Joe should drive his Gucci Fiat over to his place so they can braid each other's pussy hair

At least Joe's car isn't rented.

This fucking idiot confessed to a felony. Real smart.

But the best part about this 30K-millionaire overspending on a rental car is that we assfuck tourists on rental car taxes here. It's our way of sticking it to cornfed provincial assholes who come here in the winter, drive like shit, clog our streets, and annoy the fuck out us.

We don't give a fuck how things are down home in Milwaukee, or whatever shitburg you yokels call home. The only question worth answering is when you're going back.

nobody mess with this guy

Patrick seems like the type of guy that bases a large part of his personality on the fact he drives a manual -- and thinks it's some bad ass thing.

I drive a stick because I enjoy it but I don't think it's interesting/bad ass because both my grandmothers know how. My one buddy thinks it makes him cool

Save the Mañuels LOL

I thought his natural habitat was face down in a trough of swill?

You mean face down eating a black mans asshole while his fake wife has a bareback train run on her.

According to the Center for Disease Control they now have herpes and GRIDS.

he couldn't even get the habitat part right. his jusy says habit. wanker.

Try living life in the fast lane, I mean it is Lent.

Should I know who this dude is?

The Scottsdale Schoolyard Streaker I think. I saw him profiled on some Investigation Discovery show a while back.

He apparently runs naked and flabby through schoolyards during recess before jumping in his car and speeding off at close to 90mph in some cases. He's been at it for almost a year.

I don't know if this is the guy I saw profiled, but he does look a bit like the police sketch.

he should be put down by this alone

Nice chins, child

I think he meant "natural habitat"

Look at his stupid legs all mushed up & trying to fit. Probably has to weigh down the passenger seat so the car doesn’t topple over like the beginning of the Flinstones.

Be nice. I’m sure his wife is just as fat.

She left him for an N person, child

Behold my rented 3 series, child

He is so fat and so stupid.

Beer and brat face

How do you post this picture online when you look so fat and gross like a pig? He should be ashamed.

I hope we see a news story later about him crashing and getting trapped in the burning wreckage.

fat

What the fuck is wrong with his ear?

Ikr. It looks like it didn't finish forming in the womb or something.

Ol' premature ear ass nigga be like "hey momma can i put this up your pussy for a few it aint finished" ctfu

What a fat bag of shit

His face is everything the coloreds hate about white people

90 No blur from passing cars

Damn, nice call! Not only is he a faggot but also a liar.

Nice 'habit', stupid.

Has his head somehow gotten fatter?

Arizona is well on for it's supreme abundance of potholes

He wants to spend his afterlife driving on a fucking highway?

Absolute faggot in every sense of the word.

this is how I want to spend the afterlife

Hope you get there soon, buddy.

Nice broken thumbs when you hit a pothole, stupid.

I find Fatrick to be the most repugnant of all the characters in this sub's mythos. His puffed up, greasy cherub cherubic smile is something I think about when my self-esteem is low. At least I don't have a horrible mask of child fat glued to my face, I tell myself.

you'll spend your afterlife downstairs getting raped by the devil because you are an unapologetic pedophile (so the widely circulated rumors go anyway. we cannot say for sure but no smoke without fire etc.)

Why does his earlobe have an elbow?

Fetal alcohol syndrome.

To be both fat AND limp-wristed is truly an accomplishment.

Driving a faggoty kraut convertible fagwagon that is in all likelihood a rental. This guy is liberal boomer incarnate, even if he is actually most likely a gen x retard.

You know what to Photoshop

The rules are for thee, not for me, child.

He really is liberal Joe.

His head looks like a giant boil.

fuck is this nigga?

fuck nigga

Is he a trust fund kid? He doesn't have a job and his books can't be earning him a living wage.

He should try doing 90 painkillers.

I think he meant "my natural habitat" since "my natural habit" doesn't make any sense.

So either he's a typo making idiot, or he's Vos levels of stupid.

At least Joe's car isn't rented.

Simple mistake, but one of those two has a wife

This fucking idiot confessed to a felony. Real smart.

But the best part about this 30K-millionaire overspending on a rental car is that we assfuck tourists on rental car taxes here. It's our way of sticking it to cornfed provincial assholes who come here in the winter, drive like shit, clog our streets, and annoy the fuck out us.

We don't give a fuck how things are down home in Milwaukee, or whatever shitburg you yokels call home. The only question worth answering is when you're going back.

Be nice. I’m sure his wife is just as fat.