Gay and miserable

Stop at the first one. The Fuck is wrong with you.

Nothing wrong with stouT. But what's with the 's'? You shouldn't need more than Guinness.

Always despised Beam.

Always despised Simpsons.

I think I hated Bad Santa but I can't remember for sure. I'm with the other guy so far.

edit: maybe I'm thinking of Elf? I'll download Bad Santa tomorrow and see.

Also, though my family interlude is long over, I went out and grabbed this Tin Cup whiskey that's advertised everywhere you look now today before the liquor store closed at 6. PFG.

you sound fun

Some people have a tough time around the holiday. Those people are called “sissies” where i come from.

I am fun. I'd take about 20 lower priced whiskeys over Jim Beam (and 1000 higher priced ones). That shit just blows is all. And I don't watch cartoons where everything's fluid and fast like its whole purpose is to get a toddler's attention. If that's "not fun" to you, fine. I just think you have to have a pretty low IQ to enjoy looking at that kind of shit.

Thinking Guinness is the be all end all stout makes all your opinions irrelevant.

You're probably right. I've had a lot of bad luck with sugary ones. I fucking hate sweet beer. Getting those is particularly enraging. Keep in mind that in PA, we mostly buy beer in cases. When I think stout I think risk.

try some russian imperial styles. They're boozier and usually stronger tasting compared to other stout styles

that sounds pretty good. any tips?

lagunitas imperial stout is a pretty good bang for your buck if you're not sure you like imperial stouts

samuel smith imperial (their choco stout is good too)

if you want something sweeter, look for chocolate stouts. if you want something not as strong but still full of rich flavor, get an oatmeal stout or a milk stout. They're all great in the winter and way more flavorful than some swill like a bud light

There must be a reason you mentioned samuel smith and oatmeal stouts in the same discussion, but not samuel smith's oatmeal stout. Not a fan? God I love that shit. 60/case makes it a bit of a rarity for my wallet.

just haven't tried it, they don't sell singles or bombers of it at my local spot. His other stouts are good so maybe I'll pick up a pack of it

much appreciated. happy holidays

How fucking old are you that youve never liked the Simpsons.

Remember kids cook your buffalo chicken dip thoroughly. Send a priest and wet wipes.

watching the da vinci code. not much else going on.

Merry Christmas but eww

I like to use it as an opportunity to harass minorities.

Especially the coloreds who have the gall to celebrate your pure white holiday?

We are all as brothers in front of the lord.

That's like saying monkeies are our ancestor

I'm in a hotel, and the basic cable sucks. Watching the Game Show Network now. One of the fags from Best of Show is asking millennials to fill in the blank.

Watch Top Gear challenge playlists on YouTube. Don't depress me.

one of the fags doesn't really narrow it down any

Spending a beautiful Christmas with my girlfriend and friends with their parents. Everything is super beautiful and it makes it easier pretend that the parents aren't going away for Gran Larceny.

They stole grandma? Animals.

Which friend do you want to fuck more than your girlfriend?

The one with the cock.

I've forced my mother in law and her boyfriend to sleep on an air mattress in the converted (coldest room in the house) garage.

I'll finally call it a win this year boys.

Fuck your wife's ass at an hour where you know they're in bed but still awake.

Thats fantastic, merry christmas.

Getting blowjobs and watching the Jaws marathon on IFC.

Multiple blpwjobs? Look at Mr Moneybags over here

Just hoping Santa isn't as lactose intolerant as Jimmy not as faggoty.

The prick got us too

If you don't have funzo, you're nothing.

You should replace your hear with a plump, Christmas goose.

Poured a couple of white russians and now just wrapping presents and putting some finishing touches on the Christmas tree like a faaaaaaag.

Did all the shopping today because I am inept.

Zooted

Pretty good, drinking with my family, shooting the shit.

Duuude ya got ya family...

Spent awkwardly sitting at my distant cousins house not socializing and drinking all their beer. I’m wondering if just saying fuck it and spending the holidays alone would be better at this point.

As good a christmas as I could hope for. I took my mom and aunt out to an oyster house. My aunt and I split a dozen oysters: 4/e blue point, pei, malpeque. My mom had clams casino. They both split a caesar salad. Mains were: broiled combo for mom, 3x 4oz tails for my aunt, and for me king crab legs. 2 sam adams winters for me, 2 moscatos for my aunt. Then I drove them around for an hour looking at christmas lights, while I had sirius channel 003 playing. They played 3 different versions of silver bells in that hour - my and their mother's favorite christmas song. The first one made my mom cry a little.

I appear to be on the wrong sub.

Did ya fuck em?

Ha ha! You're why we can't have nice things! squee!

They'll both be in the nursing home in a few years. Gotta wait for the easy targets.

Counting down the hours till I pass out from these 99 cent natty daddy’s. I hope I wake up early enough to get to the store and buy my yearly bottle of Christmas whiskey.

Went to the movies with the family. Saw Welcome to Marwen which was fucking awful. Now just drinking whiskey till I pass out.

Guys,I love someone I haven't seen in over a year.

Heres a nice cliche for ya

You probably love the idea of the person at this point, not the actual person, considering its been a year and you dont know them like you used to

Probably true. I'm not mentally healthy.

Bro if you ever need to talk my DMs are open. Ill never reply and really dont care about your mental health at all, but ill pass your manifesto along.

try nearly two, faggot

Just find another cock to suck, its not that complicated.

My Eastern European grandmother told a story about how they were at some social event and a friend of hers told her she has a daughter who moved to the US and now she's married but she was kind of reluctant to show her a picture of the happy couple.

Turns out the daughter married a woman which caused both of my grandparents shake their heads in disapproval and then my grandfather added without a shred of irony "at least it wasn't a black guy".

No grandson or grandson with no father, it's a tough one man

Was having a great time until the end of the night where my uncle broke to his mom that one of his nephews is trans now. (No, not me, silly!)

She was in utter shock, denial, and disgust. It was hilarious to watch but I'm glad we were leaving right then.

After seeing the Worms tits in that picture yesterday im wondering if your uncle is Jims father.

It's Christmas Day but I smoked a joint and will probably start drinking now, visiting my mom and my grandma and retarded (literally) aunt will be here soon.

I'm wondering how long I have to wait after dinner before I can go out without looking like an asshole.

No father in the picture?

He's alone this Christmas my momma don't want that man round no mo.

But after dinner I'm gonna insufflate some drugs over at his house.

Am I the only white person here?

my parents met in rehab, i'm white trash royalty

I'm at a boarding place, only skeleton staff left. Got doubles of the best keys off the maintenance man in exchange for a case of cognac I found in the PE teacher's locker. Eating ice cream by the heated indoor pool, listening to 2008 R&F.

A boarding school? Are you living out a kids christmas movie?

Don't know, never seen one. It's not like those english places; more like a large boarding house. Nice surroundings, but duller than a Compound show. The others are mostly studious types from cushy backgrounds with horse posters over their beds.

Youve never seen a christmas movie? And whats a boarding house, are you mentally ill?

Oh hello, Shim Sham. How is your Christmas? I was born in 2006 and lived in an area without television until fairly recently; didn't cross my mind to ask for There Comes Santa on DVD. This place calls itself a 'pensionnat', which means boarding house, or boarding school in certain areas. And that's the second time I play dictionary for you, Neddy.

You should replace your hear with a plump, Christmas goose.

Did ya fuck em?