Now Jim is attempting to seduce this creature

1  2018-12-14 by Tarlan_is_cool

32 comments

the teeth match the shirt

Nice teeth stupid.

Still prettier than bams seed

Aren't you bams_seed? Is this a multiple personalities thing?

If I act like im in on the bit theyll think it dont bother me 😳

Carry on...

Hey now! Stop!

I disagree

"Seduce". Jim has two moves: "How much?" and "Would you like to open for me on the first Saturday of June?"

There's gotta be a circle of these bitches that text back and forth on what a pathetic fuck he is.

"He came over the one night to talk about an upcoming gig and he was wearing those same maroon pants and KISS shirt. We were sitting on the couch and he not so subtly slid closer to me and then I stood up and walked to the kitchen. He started blinking uncontrollably and went back to talking about the gig."

After coming into the diner every day for a month and leaving 150% tips he finally said hello. We agreed to go on a date. He suggested I come to his apartment at 2am after his set. I told him I didn't go to men's apartments on the first date and suggested we go for a coffee instead. He said "fine" but was CLEARLY annoyed about it, but I was committed at that point. He got dropped off at the starbucks by a homunculus even though I think he only lives a block away, and it was obvious he had taken a lot of cialis which was confusing. I tried to tell him about my favorite coffee spots in Manhattan and he lectured me for 15 minutes about how they all suck and he only drinks starbucks. I finished my chai really quickly and made an excuse to leave, he creepily told me I was special. He dick picked me 12 times over the next week and I quit the diner to avoid him. Someone told me he was crying on instagram over me.

Just out of interest: Who's the 'homunculus' in this fine piece of creative fiction?

Kenny

He's the humungulus

Everyone knows Patrice is humungulus.

I love O and A fan fiction!

Ahhh. An AD & D fan...

Who or what the fuck is that?

Beetlejuice

Smiley

"She" looks familiar, most likely in a Rich Vos tier of tranny porn, that Kathy Griffin looking whore Lanie was bringing porn slobs to radio shows and this one might have been tagging along

I love girls with sexy lil flaws. It builds character

Agreed. A smoming hot girl with a big nose is perfect. She's still cute, but you know she got teased growing up.

Easy to neg

And they give great head. Something about airflow. Its the same reason they're great singers.

It's like fucking a skinny, white Patrice. So nothing like fucking Patrice I guess. Boo.

I liked it.

Age.

My hand is prettier after it was run through a meat grinder

nice teeth, stupid.

Nice teeth stupid.