Horrifying Thought - If Sam Roberts (part monkey/part rodent/part predatory bird) is the apple of his mother's eye, what kind of a deformed monster is his gay brother?

39  2018-09-26 by McGowan9

Have there been sightings of the beast? Has it been captured on camera or is it the stuff of myth and speculation, like the Loch Ness monster or the Yeti?

16 comments

1  chainsofknowledge 2018-09-26

It’s like the dunwitch horror, Sam needs to find an ancient codex before his brother can be unleashed.

1  McGowan9 2018-09-26

Except Sam needed hormone therapy to reach physical maturity, unlike Wilbur. Hopefully he meets a similar fate though.

1  SpaceOddityDeoxys 2018-09-26

dunwich*

1  eidnamron 2018-09-26

i'm hoping porsalin caught a glimpse of this magnificent creature for the documentary

1  Jungies 2018-09-26

It's gonna be some blurry, shaky 8mm film taken in the Pacific Northwest, isn't it?

1  ElFaporino 2018-09-26

His brother is probably handsome and well adjusted and ma Roberts knew Sam needed more attention cause he's a special boy. Even being gay isn't as genetically unfortunate as Sam

1  McGowan9 2018-09-26

A good point. Mama's boys are often zilches who arouse their mother's natural pity and protectiveness.

1  crookedmile 2018-09-26

I've seen him!

1  Dennyislife 2018-09-26

Sam's brother isn't actually gay he just doesn't like wrestling so Sam came up with this to tarnish his name.

1  OutlawMemer 2018-09-26

"My brother is such a homo, he's SOOO into football and steaks and power tools. [dolphin cackle] What a fag!"

1  TrievelGoesSouth 2018-09-26

Bobbi Roberts is like the Queen at the end of Aliens except more protective and has even more KY jelly dripping from her mouth.

And I hope she gets killed by a walking forklift, too.

1  SledgeBammer 2018-09-26

He was in the news a few years back right?

1  jongilbonnie 2018-09-26

Boo

1  fo-da-fo-da-show 2018-09-26

Same but worse hair but better beard

1  JeremyACrosby 2018-09-26

Sam is his gay brother

1  breadmoccasin 2018-09-26

I'm guessing that Sam's brother looks and acts perfectly normal, and their mom just favors Sam because he looks like the putrid mulatto bus boy that she raped to conceive him.

Or maybe it's like the Twilight Zone episode where there's a beautiful woman and everyone else has a gross pig face.

1  BlobbyKelly00 2018-09-26

I can't believe there's someone gayer than Sam Roberts out there.

1  McGowan9 2018-09-26

His brother could be the first draft pick cocksucker for the Westchester Gay Men's Choir. He still wouldn't be anything near as much of a faggot as Sam.

1  Lickmewhereipee 2018-09-26

His brother can flick cocks off his ankle