If you've ever wanted to hire an inarticulate buffoon to read an audio book for you, now's your chance!

32  2018-09-22 by SHITLORD_CUNTDICK

26 comments

1  ChadKensingtonBulge 2018-09-22

Hire him to narrate the next Beige video

1  idamnedit 2018-09-22

I am truly impressed that under education, he didn't list "life".

1  slothscantswim 2018-09-22

School of hard knocks

1  TARE_ME 2018-09-22

more like hard cocks...

1  nomadiqqq 2018-09-22

The streets

1  PsychopathyRed 2018-09-22

Yeah he's not dying for money, fucking layabout scumbag

1  Subeck 2018-09-22

Still uses Logic 9, what a pro

1  nomadiqqq 2018-09-22

I'm sure it sits on his desktop while he uses Garageband

1  AntsCamera 2018-09-22

How much to make him say feed nana for 7 hours?

1  PatBattle1 2018-09-22

thanks, would be awesome to have him narrate the pest documentary I am working on! not sure I can afford him though.

1  jjoharanyc1 2018-09-22

If you live near an elementary school, go during recess and collect child spit in jars. You’ll be able to redeem them for voice over work.

If this is Pat from Moonachie, scratch that, as I’m sure you’re not allowed within 1,000 feet of a school.

1  A-Greedy-Goldberg 2018-09-22

"Willing and able to take direction"-- Joe get a job its been over 40 years

1  edgars_teeth 2018-09-22

special skills: telephone

1  blue_magoo_62 2018-09-22

Someone write some sons of anarchy fan fiction where they brutally but deliciously rape a man

1  WuTang4Evaaaa 2018-09-22

Extensive radio experience = my brother worked in radio

1  David_Tosk 2018-09-22

This kind of shit is only posted by someone desperate for money

1  Pogo_Thee_Clown 2018-09-22

Thought for sure he would list "Legal Wrangler" as seen on tv

1  nomadiqqq 2018-09-22

Wow! Joe did work for The Imperial Palace in Vegas. Here was the result >> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i3KPqFAmdzc

1  lolercakesmcgee 2018-09-22

None of the following is true:

Extensive radio experience with my brother, Anthony Cumia (Opie and Anthony Radio Show) Song Parodies and production bits. Cover/tribute band singer for 40 years professionally. Character voices, commercial voice over work, and capable of an extremely low range vocal. I'm a natural Baritone/Bass.

1  Jungies 2018-09-22

#Special Skills

Animation, Audiobooks, Business, Documentaries, Educational, Internet Video, Podcasting, Radio, Telephone, Television, Videogames

1  Jungies 2018-09-22

He's left off "Blackface", for some reason.

1  en_wurd 2018-09-22

make him read gay interracial erotica

1  Mintwa 2018-09-22

Smart of him to not upload any demos. Why would anyone want to hire someone they have no way of seeing how terrible they are?

1  JoeMommma101 2018-09-22

That guy who said he was writing a book about Anthony should get Joe to read it.

1  SpaceCaseBassFace 2018-09-22

How the fuck is calling into YOUR BROTHER'S radio show and plugging your shitty costume band's gigs "radio experience?" Everyone lies on their resumes, but this is too far, Joe. Also when the fuck did Outback Steakhouse hire that professional leech to do anything for them? I'll have to let them know they've done business with a racist homosexual card carrying non-pedophile.

1  McGowan9 2018-09-22

"Having the technical skills is only 1/2 of the ingredients needed to excel in a field this competitive these days. Vision and professionalism is the other 50%."

He can't be a real person. This is all some kind of experimental tv show and he's an actor. No actual person would sincerely write that and post it online.

1  scorchingcaseOderpes 2018-09-22

Experience

I'm a natural bottom

1  SlightFresnel 2018-09-22

Should we start a GoFundMe to get him to read a script full of shit we can just use against him? He'd be stupid enough to read it...

1  yevyoyevyo 2018-09-22

I wonder if he got the baritone voice from all that deep throating he does at the ranch

1  Billyassman 2018-09-22

Also,a known homosexual.