wow, comparing me to one of the most successful comedians in history? i’m honored. but that joke wasn’t that great i’d admit. i was just trying to give a glimpse of what my life is like and how sever my social anxiety has become.
that’s what i do. but still.... they ain’t buying it. ive been faking phone calls since day one. i used to always call home and ask my parents permission for sleepovers and then act sad and hang up and say they said no.
anytime you're pretending to talk on the phone it's the best bet to just talk to yourself. Just say yes or no a lot and use open ended questions. It's pretty simple.
kinda, i was cooking and my roommate walked in to make a bowl of cereal so i pretended i was talking to my mom through my headphones. then it rang and he looked up at me and made eye contact and i answered and said “hello? are you there?” over and over until he left the room.
these types of things happen all the time
i miss so many meals cause i hear them in the kitchen in the kitchen and don’t wanna go out. sometimes i’ll wait until like 2am cause i see the light shining under my door and finally walk out after hours of waiting to hear doors open and closing or footsteps.
i have a weird memory of going to stay overnight with my grandmas friends for some reason when i was in 1st grade or kindergarten. The husband had a bunch of original vintage Gi Joes that he gave me and i feel like i remember him watching me shower or something. idk if that’s real but my mom has a box of old ass gi joes and that guy and his wife divorced shortly after.
am i allowed to say i was molested? or is it my imagination?
IDK. Sounds like a good reason to go on a mushroom trip. If you tell yourself it's for PTSD or depression or whatever kind of spiritual healing, you'll feel less degenerate.
ive had atleast a hundred mushroom and lsd trips and a bunch of other dmt and research chemical trips. i hate when people on jre comments say it instantly solves your problems. sometimes it makes you so aware of the awfulness in yourself and everyone around you that it gives you a hopelessness you can never express. you realize reality is thin fragile veil over the chaos swirling inside your head. and that nothing matters, and the voices are real and you should do the bad bad thing.
sometimes i’m driving home and i start appreciating the beauty of the corn fields and livestock grazing and all the beautiful colors of the rural scenery and then i my heart starts beating and i feel sick and i think it’s happening again. and boom, full blown panic attack, i swear i trip balls, i have to pull over and sometimes throw up. but that half a minute or so before when the colors get all bright and i can look every cow and sheep in the eye at once while driving 95 mph is the only time i feel okay
I hear MDMA is good for PTSD but at a certain point, we're trying to fix a spiritual problem chemically. Feeling isolated and alienated is the cost of doing business and people's whole careers (counselors and therapists and shit) are based on making a huge societal problem the individual's fault. Like you just didn't work hard enough or don't have good enough coping strategies
20 comments
1 Mintwa 2018-09-13
Thread should be titled- bits Seinfeld wouldn't even do.
1 aRTie02150 2018-09-13
"What's the deal with upvotes? Are people actually voting from above?" Silence
1 SoulsOfDeadAnimals 2018-09-13
wow, comparing me to one of the most successful comedians in history? i’m honored. but that joke wasn’t that great i’d admit. i was just trying to give a glimpse of what my life is like and how sever my social anxiety has become.
1 aRTie02150 2018-09-13
All you got to do is pick up and say "whoops. Didn't realize I lost you there." It'll confuse whoever is calling you, but they'll get over it.
I've pulled it off more than once.
1 SoulsOfDeadAnimals 2018-09-13
that’s what i do. but still.... they ain’t buying it. ive been faking phone calls since day one. i used to always call home and ask my parents permission for sleepovers and then act sad and hang up and say they said no.
1 FezzyMarie 2018-09-13
Lol, you poor kid
1 SoulsOfDeadAnimals 2018-09-13
be nice i’m ill
1 danoranika 2018-09-13
Were you talking to the fucking air before it rang??
1 aRTie02150 2018-09-13
anytime you're pretending to talk on the phone it's the best bet to just talk to yourself. Just say yes or no a lot and use open ended questions. It's pretty simple.
1 MalcolmX_InTheMiddle 2018-09-13
Bluetooth headphones
1 SoulsOfDeadAnimals 2018-09-13
kinda, i was cooking and my roommate walked in to make a bowl of cereal so i pretended i was talking to my mom through my headphones. then it rang and he looked up at me and made eye contact and i answered and said “hello? are you there?” over and over until he left the room. these types of things happen all the time
1 danoranika 2018-09-13
I'm wheezing. You were that desperate to break the tension of a man pouring Captain crunch, you nervous Nelly
1 SoulsOfDeadAnimals 2018-09-13
i miss so many meals cause i hear them in the kitchen in the kitchen and don’t wanna go out. sometimes i’ll wait until like 2am cause i see the light shining under my door and finally walk out after hours of waiting to hear doors open and closing or footsteps.
1 danoranika 2018-09-13
My word. Where did he touch you?
1 SoulsOfDeadAnimals 2018-09-13
i have a weird memory of going to stay overnight with my grandmas friends for some reason when i was in 1st grade or kindergarten. The husband had a bunch of original vintage Gi Joes that he gave me and i feel like i remember him watching me shower or something. idk if that’s real but my mom has a box of old ass gi joes and that guy and his wife divorced shortly after. am i allowed to say i was molested? or is it my imagination?
1 danoranika 2018-09-13
IDK. Sounds like a good reason to go on a mushroom trip. If you tell yourself it's for PTSD or depression or whatever kind of spiritual healing, you'll feel less degenerate.
1 SoulsOfDeadAnimals 2018-09-13
ive had atleast a hundred mushroom and lsd trips and a bunch of other dmt and research chemical trips. i hate when people on jre comments say it instantly solves your problems. sometimes it makes you so aware of the awfulness in yourself and everyone around you that it gives you a hopelessness you can never express. you realize reality is thin fragile veil over the chaos swirling inside your head. and that nothing matters, and the voices are real and you should do the bad bad thing.
1 danoranika 2018-09-13
Been. There.
1 SoulsOfDeadAnimals 2018-09-13
sometimes i’m driving home and i start appreciating the beauty of the corn fields and livestock grazing and all the beautiful colors of the rural scenery and then i my heart starts beating and i feel sick and i think it’s happening again. and boom, full blown panic attack, i swear i trip balls, i have to pull over and sometimes throw up. but that half a minute or so before when the colors get all bright and i can look every cow and sheep in the eye at once while driving 95 mph is the only time i feel okay
1 danoranika 2018-09-13
I hear MDMA is good for PTSD but at a certain point, we're trying to fix a spiritual problem chemically. Feeling isolated and alienated is the cost of doing business and people's whole careers (counselors and therapists and shit) are based on making a huge societal problem the individual's fault. Like you just didn't work hard enough or don't have good enough coping strategies