Edgy risktaker Jim told Mary Jean not to drink, 'in case he needed her to drive'
60 2018-08-10 by Toss__Pot
wtf?! Surely the point of taking Mary Jean is to fuel-her-up with booze & watch her go. & nobody right-minded would let her drive, there are better suicide methods.
I hope she spikes Jim's smoothie with vodka & gets them in a police chase.
42 comments
1 Compound_MediaPR 2018-08-10
I would feel safer flying on the morning of September 11th 2001 than letting Mary Jean drive. Or appear on my entertainment show.
1 TheElDan 2018-08-10
HAHA HOOOL- So you’re saying that flying on a plane...on the day that the World Trade Center attack happened....would be safer than driving in a car with Mary Jean HAHAAAAA
1 masao50025 2018-08-10
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GqteBewLJzk
1 Compound_MediaPR 2018-08-10
And better than having her on the show.
1 JimandFred 2018-08-10
is he gonna get high on dijon mustard? Why would he need her to drive? Little homo, be a man, and drive her home.
1 berserka-cawk 2018-08-10
“What sccccuuuummmmbag put Dijon mustard on my egg whites?!? I’m a fucking addict! Sam, you’ll have to take it from here. I have to call my sponsor.”
1 Maxa2k13 2018-08-10
Poor colin
1 97Dabs2THAface 2018-08-10
Cause using a cellphone while you drive is illegal
1 JimandFred 2018-08-10
great point, actually.
1 WiretapStudios 2018-08-10
Can Jim even drive himself anymore or is he too scared?
1 UhLookHereMan 2018-08-10
he's too gay to drive
1 WiretapStudios 2018-08-10
Accurate point, his wrists would snap turning the wheel.
1 TheElDan 2018-08-10
He’s not strong enough to turn the wheel.
1 FloggingSchnoodles 2018-08-10
Imagine the shrieking meltdown Jim would have if someone really did spike his drink.
Even the screaming autistic kid in a wheelchair would be like "You should quiet down dude, the neighbors might call the cops."
1 PhillyBuckeye 2018-08-10
I wish someone on this sub had the kind of access to Jim to be able to get him drunk.
1 AliFrazier 2018-08-10
Remember when Guy Fieri made Sam Drink? Jim came back the show after and was critical because Guy didn't know whether Sam was an addict or not.
1 TheElDan 2018-08-10
Guy Fieri goes on Jim and Sam because he wants to know what it feels like to be the least embarrassing douchebag in the room.
1 nunyobisnez 2018-08-10
Holy shit what a phoney fucking cocksucker norton is. worse than those faggots that have to put "STRAIGHT EDGE" on every object they own
1 Toss__Pot 2018-08-10
Fuck sakes! there is a tiny percentage of people who would suddenly relapse at the sniff of a rum truffle, including those who have actually suffered alcohol withdrawal.
There is an industry of addiction where everyone plays their part; be it earning money, feeling good preaching to people, or having your self-centered bullshit legitimised as if it's important.
Just don't drink too-much, & don't be a dick.
If drinking too-much makes you a dick, accept you're a dick.
Simples! You can have that for free.
1 Mexijesus 2018-08-10
Anyone with a big dick in NYC has access to that little fruit.
1 halfwholediminished 2018-08-10
god nothing would make me happier than if somebody made jim unintentionally break his sobriety
1 sams_seed 2018-08-10
I hope she gets sloshed and he has to stop being her friend because od people places & things
1 i_saw_nothing 2018-08-10
There ya go, Jim. Sabotage the only possible way she'd ever consider sleeping with you.
Solid plan.
1 WalterWhite2012 2018-08-10
She doesn’t have a penis, so Jim isn’t interested.
1 Chuck_Chasem 2018-08-10
All the alcohol goes to her ass anyway. Jim is afraid of getting a contact-high through radiowaves.
1 Dennyislife 2018-08-10
To be fair to Jimmy would you want to spend all day with a drunk horny slut at a wedding?
She doesn't even have a penis.
1 AfraidAbbreviations4 2018-08-10
Yes.
1 RiMjObZ4dAyZ 2018-08-10
I would let her fist my ass too! Sacrifices.
1 Vict0rr187 2018-08-10
He’s a scumbag for inviting a porn star to a friends wedding. She punched their old producer in the face. What can you expect to happen at a wedding with family there.
1 racemic_mixture 2018-08-10
Fingers crossed it's an open bar.
1 gethigh_watchHBO 2018-08-10
Shouldn't he have a hotel room booked near the reception like almost everyone else? In what situation would Jim not be able to drive them home if needed?
He is really fucking this up cause I bet she would indulge him in his dirty fantasies if she had a few drinks in her.
1 Mexijesus 2018-08-10
Mary Jean is a gross ghetto skank. I'd fuck her in a second. Jim has been friends with her for years and he'll never get close. Loser.
1 LamarThePotato 2018-08-10
He knows she turns into Godzilla when she gets drunk and is afraid she might cause a scene. But he's a worm so he can't tell her that.
1 TheElDan 2018-08-10
He thinks being a fifty-year-old at a wedding with a prostitute is less pathetic than having a beer there.
1 just_a_mean_person 2018-08-10
Wait is the Jellyfish actually taking that thing to a wedding? He really is a sad individual. It's starting to be to the point where I feel like I'm mocking a severely mentally ill man. Which I'm fine with.
1 Not_My_Real_Acct_ 2018-08-10
I've posted this before -
I lived with a couple strippers when I was younger. Jim Norton is the kind of customer they despise. Basically the ideal customer gropes their tits for five minutes, hands them $100, then goes home. Strippers and whores don't want a customer who thinks they're having a "relationship."
I honestly think that there are hundreds of whores who have literally blacklisted The Worm because he's such an over-stepping creep.
1 DamonTyler 2018-08-10
I wonder if Jim actually hires prostitutes. I think he just made up stories to sound interesting.
1 RapistWithHIV 2018-08-10
He's one of those pathetic fucks who is fine being friend zoned because he likes being seen with the woman.
1 Skank_Sinatra 2018-08-10
Inviting a potn star that you're not fucking is worse than anything CK ever did.
Yes, even worse than Pootie Tang. Sa-da-tay.
1 Not_My_Real_Acct_ 2018-08-10
Taking a blow up doll would be less embarrassing. Jim Norton makes my skin crawl.
1 champ-chomp-chump 2018-08-10
Jim went retarded.
Also, I'd fuck Mary Jean's dumb ass.
1 LiberalPussy 2018-08-10
Jim “Incel” Norton
1 BrothamanB5010 2018-08-10
As long as you're a good and safe driver there's no problem driving drunk.
1 Toss__Pot 2018-08-10
Exactly!
Also, statistics prove that you're less likely to die in a car accident if you're drunk... enough of these science deniers, facts are facts! Safety first!!
1 TheWelfareMan 2018-08-10
Sounds like you've never been drunk like a real man
1 TheWelfareMan 2018-08-10
Captain buzz kill, if he can't have fun no one will
1 AliFrazier 2018-08-10
Remember when Guy Fieri made Sam Drink? Jim came back the show after and was critical because Guy didn't know whether Sam was an addict or not.
1 Mexijesus 2018-08-10
Anyone with a big dick in NYC has access to that little fruit.