Fuck, Marry, Kill: Amy Schumer, Dave Landau’s wife, and Joey ‘Coco’ Diaz

4  2018-05-03 by Suibu

17 comments

Fuck Amy Schumer, Marry Dave's fat pig wife, kill Joey Diaz. If any of you answer differently, you're either lying or gay.

being called gay here isnt an insult

Thank you, because I was feeling guilty about wanting to fuck Joey Diaz. Thank you for your support.

Faggots have a name for people like you.... Gay

I'm "non binary" That means I suck cock but I'm really bad at math.

And that faggots are ashamed of you

Amy Schumer and Joey Diaz, fuck or marry either way, I have no opinions on them whatsoever.

Dave Landau's morbidly obese wife, on the other hand...

I believe Metallica had an album that answers that question

KILL 'EM ALL

Yeah and then they need to RIDE THE LIGHTNING and become DEATH MAGNETIC and then there will be AND JUSTICE FOR ALL

BLACK ALBUM

One you do that you'll be the MASTER OF PUPPETS

fawk yeah and then you'll blow your LOAD

I’d marry Dave’s wife she’s not so fat that she can’t come back from it, fuck Amy (yuk) and kill Joey Diaz cause he’s not funny and useless.

Fuck all of them and kill myself.

Donkey fuck Amy Schumer, Mary Landaus pig wife cause you know that bitch can cook a good southern meal, kill the spic

I’m still torn on the other two, but always kill the spic. Always.

You would need a vuuurry high-powered harpoon to kill any of the three.

You would need a shit ton of flour to fuck any of the three. Ya know so you can find a wet spot?

You would need crippling shame, depression and self-doubt to marry any of the three.

I got them all, so I guess it’s a toss-up.

I'd marry Amy in a heartbeat. Sure she's a piggy and not terribly attractive even thin(-ish), but she's not the nightmare we have fun saying she is, and think of all that money. Bitch is jet-and-helicopter rich, and she likes to eat so you know the contents of her fridge would be the shit. She's probably got like a dozen T-Bones at all times in her walk-in freezer, and when you go shopping you can do shit like throw 15 cheeses in the cart from the gourmet section. The best wine, scotch and beer that they make. All for having to fuck a chubster every so often? If you wouldn't want that you're either dumb or rich yourself. Her big tits aren't great but at least they'll wrap all the way around your dick. My biggest concern physically actually is with all that F you money she might not bother shaving her patch. A fatty's twat is that much worse when there's a nest of hair choking it off.

It's basically the Chappelle Oprah sketch. I wouldn't knock her up though, fuck having kids. Hate those little shits.

Thank you, because I was feeling guilty about wanting to fuck Joey Diaz. Thank you for your support.