"What the fuck!? You never seen a HOT, HOT 13 year old that was COMPLETELY FUCKABLE!?" -Anthony "Traditonal Family Values" Cumia

"Let's be honest! You've seen 13 year olds and gone 'Oh my God, she's 13?'" - Anthony "Greased Lightning" Cumia

"Oh, in a second, I'd be all over her." -Anthony "The iPod Gifter" Cumia, referencing a 13 year old girl on the Maury Povich Variety Hour