r/opieandanthony: What's you're excuse for not being out right now?

What's you're excuse for not being out right now?

6 2018-01-20 by NortheastPhilly

I was very sick this week. I'm saving my binging for when I'm dangling above Broad Street by a traffic light after the Eagles win. They can't lube up EVERY pole.

45 comments

1 Opprobriousness 2018-01-20

You idiot, this is one of the times you didn't need an apostrophe.

1 NortheastPhilly 2018-01-20

Well excuse me, H.R. Grammarman

1 Opprobriousness 2018-01-20

It's ok.

I'm pulling for your Eagles. Hope they win it all and if not them, the Vikings.

Though I also hope Joel Embiid breaks his leg. Fuck that guy.

1 NortheastPhilly 2018-01-20

I'm not a fan of Embiid either. He plays half of his games and is constantly grab-assing around town and everyone thinks it's cute. I hate everything the Sixers stand for and hope they lose for 10 straight years just so everyone that ever trusted the process eats their words

1 Opprobriousness 2018-01-20

The only 76er I like is Robert Covington, who is just fucking good at everything except when he's missing a ton of shots in a game.

I don't hate Ben Simmons either, but he's gonna pull a Blake Griffin and win RoY even though he had a full year of hanging around the NBA before he played. Donovan Mitchell deserves that shit.

1 Midian9876 2018-01-20

Drank heavily last night already and trying to drop some pounds for a trip I’m going on next month with some friends and this hot chick I desperately need to impregnate.

1 smokeyhoof1221 2018-01-20

boo

1 CasinoIndian 2018-01-20

My boyfriend broke his foot.

The way his toes wiggle out the end of his cast is vurry arousing.

1 NortheastPhilly 2018-01-20

Are you a girl?

1 CasinoIndian 2018-01-20

No. Thank GOD~

1 NortheastPhilly 2018-01-20

So you're gay

1 TinKnockinMoroccan 2018-01-20

You looking for a date?

1 NortheastPhilly 2018-01-20

Yeah you gay?

1 TinKnockinMoroccan 2018-01-20

Not for cock

1 NortheastPhilly 2018-01-20

Than what for?

1 TinKnockinMoroccan 2018-01-20

Da pussy

1 Single_Action_Army 2018-01-20

Faggot

1 NortheastPhilly 2018-01-20

You led me on

1 iWhoreSchortSchorts 2018-01-20

Rape

1 boring_oneliner 2018-01-20

Pm me your dick

1 [deleted] 2018-01-20

[removed]

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1 deanthecleanmachine 2018-01-20

My excuse is that Im a loser so Im watching seinfeld and looking for one of my guns

1 HorologicallyInsane 2018-01-20

Work tomorrow at 7am, bitch.

1 Martillo_Valentine 2018-01-20

I'm a drunk who drinks alone.

1 crookedmile 2018-01-20

Me too. Plus I twisted my ankle. The two aren't mutually exclusive.

1 timallenonacid 2018-01-20

I’m in reclusive mode, I went out with my friends three nights in a row culminating with New Years Eve. That was more than enough for me, I have ignored all of their phone calls and texts since. Tried to hit one of them up tonight and rightfully got the old “oh yeah, can’t tonight” treatment. I don’t mind, I have bud light and call of duty (actually whiskey and GTA, I’m not that faggy) and was only really calling them to make sure the relationship wasn’t completely in the morgue. The older I get the more I I see the inferiority in spending 150 dollars at a bar and a cab, when I could only spend 25 and get plastered alone.. dealing with annoying swamp donkeys, listening to them babble when I could just jerk off in 4 minutes and be done with it, paying 100 dollars to do coke until noon the next day and having a horrible comedown when I could wake up feeling fine in my own bed, and listening to the inner drama of a friends circle, all the fights about nothing and all the lying/cheating on each other, when I could be at home alone, in peace, listening to and watching whatever I want with no input from others. Having friends is nice sometimes, it’s cool to have someone to travel with or catch a concert with. But the “its Friday night you should be out partying or you’re a loser” lifestyle is fading for me. Maybe I’m just getting old or maybe it’s because the bars play Little Pump in them and im autistic, alcoholic, antisocial and hate all of my friends and also every other living human.I don’t know, I’m just not sure. It’s a tough one.

1 NortheastPhilly 2018-01-20

You seem like a stick in the mud

1 doodoopeepees 2018-01-20

Hopefully you're not in your 30s and realizing this.

1 timallenonacid 2018-01-20

1 doodoopeepees 2018-01-20

Good, now find a lady youre age and get married 6 months into the relationship and repopulate the human race. Or mod gta5 to pretend to be a cop and livestream it.

1 LarryKleist711 2018-01-20

Very gud. Invest in bitcoin and call it a day friend.

1 jewboy408 2018-01-20

I'm climbing mount Hubbard at first light

1 andycumiashow 2018-01-20

I'm 29 and I'm sick of putting on a persona and pretending I'm not an autistic curmudgeon who enjoys his own company.

1 GimpyDaniel 2018-01-20

Aw shit.

Hello me, meet the real me.

Also a little of the guy below you: