He'd look better without that pile of pubes on his head. Stop trying to pretend you aren't going bald and just shave your fucking head you faggot.

Get a load of Homer Simpson mouth over here.

And Krusty hair

He used to be Sideshow Bob. Time is a bitch

[cave man sam]{https://static1.squarespace.com/static/523353c4e4b08346f3becc5f/52336055e4b08e30928172bf/523360c0e4b00100a23c6e64/1380140416383/Screen+shot+2013-09-13+at+3.00.02+PM.png?format=500w}

He looks like a fucking wax figure

Shave your head you Larry Fine look-a-like muthafucka

He’s bald

This was the exact face made the moment before the wheel was discovered.

tss more like ne ander short or sumpthin tss

The only thing that truly freaks me out about him are his thumbs. In this picture, you can barely see, he is punching his thumb and pointer finger together. And his fucking thumb is as long as his pointer finger basically fully extend. Horrendous

Sammy Old Muffins

There is a person who he looks exactly like, but I can't put my finger on who. I feel like it's a really shitty low level stand up comic from the 80's

Bulletin: his wife will leave him when their child is around 10-12 years old.

Prayer: make this happen sooner

Cosh-toom

goddamn, that hair is moving back fast.

Jess let this thing penetrate her, and decided he's a good fit for the father and protector of her child.

More likely he shared her with some wrestler. Given that Jess isn't all that hot (like Bubba's ex who got Hulkster cock), I figure Sam's paying to raise the child of The Honky Tonk Man.

HGH is a helluva drug.

Only guys with strong chins look good with a beard. Having said that, he probably couldn't look any worse so nothing to lose.