If someone spoils the new Star Wars movie, they will be permanently banned...

23  2017-12-13 by mkubrick

From going to see Rich Vos at Helium Comedy Club in Philly January 4-6

30 comments

1  bonniesretardsister 2017-12-13

Yoda dies from AIDS.

1  fingerrockets 2017-12-13

yeah well, Yoda 's ghost dies from

1  Canned_Laugh 2017-12-13

Luke is gay, chewy falls in love with the token black guy and Luke with a gash finds out her parents left with the flute player at the Cantina to sell ewok blood on the black market.

1  Bakersfield__Chimp 2017-12-13

This would be a far more entertaining movie than what's, presumably, coming out.

1  cringingdouchechills 2017-12-13

They know that whatever shit they put out there that millions of worthless, obese, virgins are dying to be the biggest faggot at the water cooler

1  AppleFan79 2017-12-13

Pre-fucking-cisely.

1  3stepsbackward 2017-12-13

Luke gets fired after he films Jabba the Hutt taking a shit.

1  cormacMcCarthysWhore 2017-12-13

i hope you wake up late at night and have to stumble to the bathroom in the dark and when you sit on the toilet a grizzly bear attacks you

1  TriangleDimes 2017-12-13

lol so random

1  OkaySeriouslyBro 2017-12-13

I heard Rey gets romantically involved with Kylo

1  AppleFan79 2017-12-13

She deep throats his love sabre.

1  OkaySeriouslyBro 2017-12-13

http://i.4cdn.org/wsg/1513138878190.webm

Here's the video!

1  TossyMcSalad 2017-12-13

his light saber will turn from red to brown

1  AppleFan79 2017-12-13

Saw this one coming a parsec away.

1  Toss__Pot 2017-12-13

Will it be filled with SJW horseshit?

1  AppleFan79 2017-12-13

The three leads are a nigger, a woman & a faggot.

So the answer is a resounding "yes".

1  holodog 2017-12-13

Harrison Ford mumbles his lines and looks confused because he should've retired 5 years ago.

1  Mcchiseslizzy 2017-12-13

That's too cruel of a punishment for any crime

1  Single_Action_Army 2017-12-13

A bunch of British white guys who dress like Nazis have an evil device and a bunch of minorities stop them with laser swords even though the enemy has guns.

1  Sthenine 2017-12-13

This is the exact wording of the plot outline issued to Disney.

1  Mu_Scevich 2017-12-13

Gotta admit, this is spot on.

1  InHell1979 2017-12-13

Snoke is Luke's Grandfather. Come fight me nigga

1  naziniggerfaggot 2017-12-13

wtf is a porg?

1  TossyMcSalad 2017-12-13

the latest moneygrab

1  Sthenine 2017-12-13

Hans solo dies...oh that was the last one.

1  David_Tosk 2017-12-13

It's a kids movie. The fact that people my age are fawning over this, is just the saddest thing ever

1  Anarox 2017-12-13

It's a cliche filled fanservice horseshit franchise.

DO YOU MEMBA THIS, HERE IT IS AGAIN

1  birdmanisreal 2017-12-13

Who watches Star Wars nowadays anyway? They're kids movies. Fucking awful.

1  fervt 2017-12-13

Lando makes a big stink about space rights or something and gets to close the movie with a dunking contest and or rap battle.

1  Chuck_Chasem 2017-12-13

Luke sucks some tits on the island he's been on for 20 years.

1  goodnaturedchortles 2017-12-13

Han Solo gets caught eating watermelon out of Darth Maul's ass while Chewbacca watches and jerks off <insert Wookie yell>

1  kjb109 2017-12-13

There is PC correct GAY relationship in this one.

Wait a minute; they're all GAY.

1  Sthenine 2017-12-13

This is the exact wording of the plot outline issued to Disney.

1  Mu_Scevich 2017-12-13

Gotta admit, this is spot on.