HEY GANG: HERE'S MY TAKE ON HOW TO MAKE THE "PERFECT" FRY...

4  2017-11-16 by Every1ShouldBKilled

“Perfect” fries: ONE HOUR

1: Use Idaho Russet potato’s (less moisture in the potato, the better). CUT THINLY OR MEDIUM SIZED: NO THICK CUTS (THIN CUTS reduce moisture and prevent them from being soggy).

OPTIONAL: put cut fries in cold water under tap for 5 MIN, to erase excess starch.

2: Bring water to boil, then to a simmer. Add CUT potatoes to water (w/ pinch of salt) and blanch them for 10-15 or 20 MIN. Not too long, or the potatoes break down.

3: Steam dry on a baking rack for 15 MIN.

OPTIONAL: put in fridge for 30 min to re-crystallize starch on outside of fry.

4: First fry for 10 MIN at 284 DEGREES (preferably w/ PEANUT OIL), then rest back on baking rack for 10 MIN.

OPTIONAL: Or back in the fridge for another 10-15 minutes.

5: Second fry at 356 DEGREES at roughly 10 MIN, or until desired doneness.

ENJOY GANG! HOPE IT SPRUCES UP YOUR MEAL ;)

20 comments

3  deanthecleanmachine 2017-11-16

I hope someone tries this and slips with the hot oil in hand and pours all over their dumb face

3  Ant_Sucks 2017-11-16

Why don't you do a Louis CK and make a 10 minute scene for your show featuring you making your own home version of fast food shit. Then jerk off.

2  sexylarrytate 2017-11-16

I home someone tries this and gradually gets frustrated until on step 5 burns his hand, throws the fries across the kitchen, then stabs his woman for encouraging him

1  Every1ShouldBKilled 2017-11-16

Thats a funny joke, just NOT IN TODAY'S CLIMATE, AMIRITE OR WRONG CHIEF?

2  Yaseetheo 2017-11-16

More like CHEF if he's the one making the fries right gang?

1  sexylarrytate 2017-11-16

Dont call me chief yer cultcher apropulatin ohr somethin , ya fag

1  ihaveaholeinmyass 2017-11-16

Everyone know the Maris Piper is the superior potato for chipping you Yankee Doodle dingbat

6  Every1ShouldBKilled 2017-11-16

ROIGHT BUT IF YEH NOT IN LONDON PROPER, YEH CANT GIT MARIS PIPER, INNIT? SO IDAHO RUSSET IS ALL U CAN GET INNIT? ITS STILL COMES OUT BRILLIANT

0  ihaveaholeinmyass 2017-11-16

As you were then fella

2  burlapsack69 2017-11-16

Why cant i get fish n chips in the newspaper over there anymore?

2  ihaveaholeinmyass 2017-11-16

I think it was a health and safety thing cuz the ink of the print could get on the food... I'm not 100% sure tbh, but I definaty remember them coming in newspaper when I was a kid

2  burlapsack69 2017-11-16

Sounds right. Must have been sort of recently. I was able to get it in 2006. Amazing fish n chips but the rest of your food is bland as shit. Probably how your population isn't all dying from diabetes.

1  racemic_mixture 2017-11-16

Hey you guys wanna eat fries but make it way more complicated than the basic side dish needs to be?

1  Every1ShouldBKilled 2017-11-16

Off The Record: Boy is it a pain in the ass to do. Just fry them once at 284 for 10, let em sit 10 min, then fry em again at 356 for 10 MIN. Thats it.

1  momomike 2017-11-16

great post. call it “pomme frites” and post a high res photo french fries with about two dozen instagram filters, and this is front page reddit material.

1  jsnoots 2017-11-16

Tell how your autistic gay grandma taught you to make them too.

1  ApeNia 2017-11-16

A punch of salt or a pinch?

1  Every1ShouldBKilled 2017-11-16

pinch sorry

1  ApeNia 2017-11-16

Sometimes you don't make no fuckin' sense, Donnie.

-1  Canned_Laugh 2017-11-16

Idaho russet potatoes are for faggots.

Edit: otherwise they sound tasty.