boo

Please do a series finale with Joe calling the cops

Joe going into the witness protection program would rule.

Heyyy, it's me, Sheahmus McGlaaaugh-lin.

You ever have it where you order spaghetti and you get egg noodles and ketchup?

Happens to me all the time.

You ever get it where Karen flushes all the money we have right down the crapper?

adderall

"That was all the allowance you gave me Karen!"

WE NEEDED THAT KAREN!

KARENNN

Just a regular schmuck

like a schnook

If you don’t I will.

I prefer committing suicide.

Or get real on if you promise that is the last one

you can retire the bit when joe kills his family then hangs himself, you have a responsibility now sir

Will a weight machine be involved in the murder/suicide?

I have one that's not in use anymore.

Dude you're right on the verge of breaking him. You've got a talent you can't just stop. This thing we do is bigger than your i

Push it to the limit walk along the razor's edge don't look back just keep your head up till you're finished, faggot

Rest in piece. I enjoyed the hell out of the saga.

Sounds like Joe scared ya

I think him and Opie use to work for the Mafia

"legit"

Is anything more pathetic than people who pretend to have ties to organized crime?

joe materesse always win at the end

Who shot ya?

Porsalin is all-in with some redbar guy, & that idiot told Joe that he'd stop chattin about him if he un-blocked some nobody on twitter... porsalin likes those peeps better than this sub!

But redbar was bitchin that porsalin was stealing his bit... wasn't he?

I really aint sure, only listened to couple of clips.

I'm starting to think you're not a very reliable source of information

wtf dude?! I come here for fun, but I'm starting to wish I never got genuine & tried to share knowledge

Redbar is always talking about how awesome this sub is with their shaming of fools, and has specifically shouted out porsalin for his content.

Well il just shut the fuck up then

I see tons of people saying what you said, so it's obviously not you, and it's always confused me because Mike has always been super positive about this sub.

Like, you can not like his show (I like it but I can see where it would bore people), but you should know that he's on board with all of the Cumia and Matarese hate, to the point where he was calling up comedy clubs pretending to be Matarese a few months ago.

He absolutely whined about "when did it become OK to steal my Joe matarese bit". It was after the Josh robert Thompson thing.

He hyped hs 'Cumia exposee' show, but then it was just 8hours of stuff this sub had been discussing for years, from then on I decided he stinks, & I don't like him. He owes me 8 hours. (I didn't really listen that long, but he still owes me!)

15 minutes of listening to RedBar is worse than being subjected to a 24 hour marathon of Lena Dunham’s, Amy Schumer’s & Chelsea Handler’s most obnoxious material on a constant loop.

So you're a fan?

This never happened

better to end on a high note. wigger rich collab was a pretty dope finale

ok, what did he say in his crying email?

I actually respect you for being a good guy... but this place is part of my entertainment schedule, so I'm conflicted.

If this is all it takes for joe to destroy himself, something else will take down Joe anyways. If He really wanted to get better he would stop doing stand up. See a real shrink and take care of himself, stop fighting the delusion of being the next Marc Maron

No.

Thanks for the laughs now go kill yourself you stupid British fuck. I hope you choke on a warm beer and a banger.

The thought that I wont hear hey its joe matarese again makes me said

That voice will stay with me to the end

OK who got to you?

Noooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You've shattered my world! The least you could do is have a final episode to wrap up the series.

Please do a grand finale with Edgar

u make me SICK.

You are the Seinfeld of this subreddit. I appreciate your creative integrity.

I wish we could have had a final episode with actual Joe on there, but...it was still a damn good run. Made me laugh.

You are the Seinfeld of this subreddit.

Inexplicably popular despite not being funny?

That, and the fact that Seinfeld walked away from his show at the height of its popularity, they were offering something like 3 mil an episode. He declined.

What - you didn't like the hundreds of seconds of successful material he put out after his show ended?

Quitter shitter

I get it if you want to end it before it gets old, but dont do it for Joe. He brought all of the shit onto him self.

I'm literally shaking right now

Everyone here would be if they weren't drunk.

Has Joe done/said more since that stupid email from a few days ago?

Run it into the ground you limey faggot

Right? Where the fuck does this idiot think he is?

This fucking guy is acting like he’s Michael Jordan retiring early. Fuck that, do the bit while continuing to show no regard for your dental health.

I say run. Once y’all get bored of the bit, you’ll go after him. Better to be a faggot than a Joe Materese.

Run it into the ground you limey

Yeah you guys are good at it. Look at the British Empire.

They had a good run.

good run.

yeah thats what the did. They ran away.

One time when we went huntin' we saw a sign that said 'Bear left', so we went home

Yeah a guy was going hunting with his wife and dog. His wife didnt want to go so He said "Either suck me off or let me fuck you in the ass. His wife said "eww no I'll just blow you". As soon as she did, she said "eww it taste like shit" and the guy was like "yeah the dog didnt want to go either". hahah GET IT? Jokeman Martling

You know why this is everyone hates the British, you suck, faggot

To quote Archie Bunker, "England is a fag country."

Seriously.. this really is the only funny thing left in the entire OA multiverse.

Very sad day. I actually listened to at least 30 percent of a Jim and Sam episode the other day.

There's slim pickings out there mate.

So.. Throw another shrimp on the barbe and Bob's your uncle or something.

Wigger Rich is tremendous too.

At least do a handful more videos of calling internet based call in shows. There are plenty of obscure shows to prank. I'm thinking Tradio meets Joe Matarese.

l he gave me his Godfather-like blessings to continue these uninterrupted.

Translation: go after my wife and kids in the next episode.

Going out on top, a real rarity here. Well done sir

You are a true gentleman sir. I love the bit & wish you’d continue but I respect your decision. To bad others here have no regard about running a joke into the ground, some have no clue that the joke is no longer funny & continue to obnoxiously post the same stupid joke over & over, the beginning of April comes to mind as does the Rich Vos tour date pranks.

So do we now get to hear 100% "Italian" with Joe Cumia?

let me in #call-screener

Good call imo, it was still funny but if you call it now you go out on top.

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!!!

Now you're just another schlub like the rest of us. Enjoy.

Please give us a finale! Just one last episode.

We need the Joe vs Joe finale

I was hoping for that too

Joe kills himself in the end.

Bummer but I understand your decision. Now lets focus all of our powers on Opie again.

Aw man, I was looking forward to the otto and George episode hinted at the end of the Patrice one. I beg you to reconsider, if only for one last episode.

I, seriously, look more forward to new 100% Italians more than anything else in the O&A Universe. I really hope you reconsider. I beg you!!!

Don't let Joe fall into the abyss of obscurity. He needs the buzz.

you kinda beat it into the ground, i only laughed when you called that voice over douche guy

Going out on a high note with integrity?

Wtf mate, you’re doing this for free, just run it to the ground.

floundering around and causing other people trouble, has to be made frequently in a lifetime. In youth we are taught the rather simple rule never to quit, because we are presumably following programmes made by people wiser than ourselves. My own conclusion is that when one has embarked on a course that grows increasingly doubtful and one feels the vital forces beginning to be used up, it is best to ask advice if decent advice is in range.

F. Scott Fitzgerald

The decision as to when to quit, as to when one is merely floundering around and causing other people trouble, has to be made frequently in a lifetime. In youth we are taught the rather simple rule never to quit, because we are presumably following programmes made by people wiser than ourselves. My own conclusion is that when one has embarked on a course that grows increasingly doubtful and one feels the vital forces beginning to be used up, it is best to ask advice if decent advice is in range.

F Scott Fitzgerald

POLL TIME

Thank you for your service

What???!!? You can't, you're almost there

Coming soon: "110 % Italian!"

Someone else could easily do the voice, but the content may not be as good. Nonetheless it would still drive the precious darling further into madness. Whatever happens this event is legendary.

Is this an invite to play steal the bacon or are you not into dudez?

Why would you retire the bit when you're capable of stealing his identity? You're already more popular than him. You should start getting booked on shows and whatnot. This doesn't end until you fuck his wife.

You're making this thread because you want all the attention of this sub to be on you. You want people to say "nooo please do more you're so funny", you needy faggot.

They're doing bob Kelly and chad memes today. They will get back to kissing your ass for this mediocre, reference-based show tomorrow.

The last few episodes particularly sucked because you stopped trying to say things Joe Mataterese would say or referencing actual events, and instead started trying to use the character as a mouthpiece for your own "humor"

Go to an open mic night. Your own shoe horned jokes are the low point of 100% Italian

He even analyzes it

So you take this very seriously huh?

Yeah, it's different when you write your long, angry paragraphs about things you don't like

Won’t catch me writing ppgs

I don't know what that is, but I went through your history, fag.

You're just a alone and internet obsessed as I am, the difference is you feel ashamed and try to hide it. Only neurotypical normies have that problem

You sound fun

This really is a bummer. But as someone already said the voice will stick in my head for a very very long time.

Take some time off, more shit will come along.

That or be a fucking pussy limey faggot and go jump into traffic.

Either way, you have my support.

just save episodes for times when Joe either really makes an asshole of himself or if he ever happens to step on our toes here in the subreddit. Don't let the guinea win

I 100% don't care

God Speed Sir.

Come on, do one final one. We need closure.

/u/porsalin

Good. Cringey unfunny shit anyway.

To be honest, it had run its course.

Great work

Episode 3 was like Season 26 of The Simpsons.

Haha. Yes

You used to be somebody. Now you’re just a nobody

REST ASSURED Joe will do or say something ridiculous/shitty in the near future and we can all pick back up where we left off.

Are you actually going to see Jim Norton perform live in Cuckshire, England, or were you just being polite?

Tell him you're the 100% Italian guy then smile and wink like peers.

Don't kubera us, give us a final show. Please.

Encore

You must end this properly or forever be a nigger

Don’t retire it for good.

God bless you sir!

Is this a fucking joke?

[removed]

Welcome to reddit sockcucka! New users are able to submit posts after 2 days. If you think your post is a fair contribution to the subreddit, message the moderators for a faster approval.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

Joe needs to call a suicide hotline. Both of them

I never really got it anyways.

Joe going into the witness protection program would rule.

If you don’t I will.

I prefer committing suicide.

Or get real on if you promise that is the last one

Yeah, it's different when you write your long, angry paragraphs about things you don't like