This douche chill was brought to you by Onnit

71  2017-09-06 by DooshLord

69 comments

Yuck

You still wake up sometimes in your sensitivity deprivation tank, don't you Joe? You wake up in the dark and hear the screaming of the coyotes.

sensitivity deprivation

You're a bigger retard than he is

I initially went with hypobaric chamber because I couldn't remember what the fuck he called the thing.

It's a sensory deprivation tank because it deprives you of your senses, you silly goose.

Tss why not a dollary deprivation tank?

homerun

No, it's bariatric chamber

Geriatric chamber.

He's a moron.

Guys, make sure to smoke weed before you hit 18. Get those dumb stoner thoughts out of your system before you end up like this old man.

doug benson started when 28 and he's fine!

Yeah, same with Kevin Smith and he's doing just fine.

Yeah, same with Kevin Smith and he's doing just fine.

WE HEARD YOU!!!!

Yeah, same with Kevin Smith and he's doing just fine

What's that thing about Kevin???

Yeah, same with Kevin Smith and he's doing just fine

Yeah, same with Kevin Smith and he's doing just fine

wassat?

You can hardly tell because he never hit that phase where he tries to impress everyone with how much pot he smokes or advertises to everyone how it's now his whole life. He's kept it really low-key.

I'm 25 and Doug Benson is older than my father.

If joe wasn't a podcaster,he would be the 38 year old guy you bought weed from in high school that would always try to be deep but you just felt bad for him because he was trying to relate to high school kids.

If Norton had ANY balls, he would pick this apart on the show for 20 min. How many fags picked up their sasquatch kettle bells and drank some iron man coffee after reading that horseshit?

Powerful.

Hurricane Harvey fucking murdered.

It absolutely destroyyyed

Tss tss I hear coyotes too- they're calling me to join their pack dvv dvv.

fawk yeaaaa chippy can run with any pack

A pack so deep only Rogan can comprehend it dvv dvv dvv

I'm so glad I don't smoke pot.

don't blame weed for Rogan

Not to share vernacular with dykes but, eww.

It's called buying a new capacitor for your AC system, faggot. They get blow in that kind of extended heat... not some existential soul from a power plant.

What a douchebag.

Don't listen to this corporate shill, Joe. I can fix your AC unit for $20 with a pocket knife, bubble gum, and roll of pennies. I know things the power company doesn't want you to know, man.

He should get Cumia to install it.

that's O-N-N-I-T!

Gross

I think he stole whole speech off a poster with a crying Indian

first generation sicilian total fuckin fugazy

holy fucking shit. This is the worst thing he's ever said.

Our settlements on this twirling globe of elements..

What the fuck

..coyotes are screaming in the hills tonight...

As if some coyotes in Montana know a hurricane is hitting the east coast you fucking idiot.

no mannnnn its a metaphor

Ewww what the fuck. I thought it was some "animals are having a premonition" type thing that he talks about a lot. This is even douchier.

The Coyotes are the anchor keeping him grounded in the fact that we all are just living in nature. Deep as a fawkin puddle. Rogan is a massive (little) faggot

So it's not terrible when he said on

It was a bright sunny day in miami at sunset tonight. You would have no clue even being there.

Have you ever really thought about water!?!?

Schools could reboot the DARE program with Rogan as the poster child as to why not to smoke. Smoke and you'll wind up as a 50 year old midget posting new age sounding comments constantly.

If my DARE officer used Joe as an example, I would've never tried marijuana. I would've gone straight to heroin, like a good boy.

Just drink some vodka at least you would be normal for a few hours a day

smart dumb guy

Coyotes make noise every night. This is nothing unusual nor is it a sign of the apocalypse. Joe trying to set the mood for his idea of a dramatic post.

Nigger he was crafting a beautiful scenario

Well he failed

He's trying to get you to SUB to onnit

Also: Buy my new muscle mass product Place-Bo!

*The wild dogs cry out in the night

As they grow restless longing for some solitary company

I know that I must do what's right Sure as Kilimanjaro rises like Olympus

above the Serengeti*

Shut up Joe

Serrrrrren- get-eee, you mean. Man did they shoehorn that line.

I wish you were trying to rise above the sarin-gassy.

Ayahuasca is a hell of a drug...

Does this dude not know how power plants work. They all have steam boilers that are used only when more electricity needs to be produced

I just threw up in my mouth

This "ever recorded" stuff can eat my asshole. 150 years isn't shit.

Late 30s backwards hat fleshlight Rogan was far more tolerable. He just didn't seem serious like O N N I T Rogan.

Yikes

so what is it? like an F4 ?

Its a kitty 5. Could be a kitty 6 but there's only 5 kittygories

His followers who think he is insightful and intelligent are glimmering example of why the American education system is failing.

What year does he think this is? Our power infrastructure is fine.

WEEEEEEEEED MON

Yeah, same with Kevin Smith and he's doing just fine