Ant: Do you still go over to Dealey Plaza when you're in Dallas?
Jimmy: I went last time with Kenny, we-
Ant: Wish you went with Kennedy. Because you know, he was the one who died... (Pause) Club Soda Kennedy.
Ant does Club Soda Kenny impression: Oops, I dropped my brain...
Jimmy does Club Soda Kenny impression: Ask not what I should do for this country because I won't remember...
Ant: Jackie O is on the trunk lid with a pair of tweezers.
It's not like redoing your roof lol.
He's right, it's not. Redoing a roof for someone could mean some stuff would be out of your control and issues come up which force you to ask for a higher price. Can't see any issue forcing him to increase the price for an hour of talking, transportation and such are not included in the hourly rate after all.
I was feeling kind of sorry for him before but he's not only trying to get people to be his club and agent he's also unwilling to quote a price to rip them off for as much as he can.
Do you get paid a lot sometimes Joe? Do you? Then why are you enthusiastically emailing a guy about doing a 15-person bachelor party?
"I'd prob scare hell out of you if you knew how much I get paid sometimes"
Yeah it would scare the hell out of me if the internet bill, the one bill my rich wife has tasked me with is due and I've only been paid $18 for my last gig.
Can poor and middle class people stop fucking describe ourselves by carelessly using the word "rich" to deceive any person or family who has an above average income?
Nobody who has to wake up to an alarm five days a week is "rich". Nobody who has a boss is "rich". Rich is waking up st 2pm on a Thursday then flying first class to a top-storey EDM rave in Dubai because you felt like it that day.
"My wife works as a psychologist, so she's rich." This is why the elite laughs at us like the fucking pathetic, impoverished ants that we are.
This would be a good plot for a horror movie with dark comedy undertones. Hack comedian offered generous sum for private backyard gig; arrives at Leatherface estate in middle of nowhere where audience consists of Manson Family castoffs. Midway through routine he gets bum-rushed, and remainder of film is about him being sadistically tortured Hostel-style.
Immediately after he received this email, you know that Joe raced into the living room where his exhausted wife was passed out after working a 20 hour shift; and shouted "See? I told you I'd make it! I've already had two bookings! Now I'm gonna be the one paying YOU pocket money! Who's the loser now?" I'd be very surprised if she hasn't already resorted to stealing opiates from cancer patients.
I was feeling kind of sorry for him before but he's not only trying to get people to be his club and agent he's also unwilling to quote a price to rip them off for as much as he can.
Do you get paid a lot sometimes Joe? Do you? Then why are you enthusiastically emailing a guy about doing a 15-person bachelor party?
"I'd prob scare hell out of you if you knew how much I get paid sometimes"
Yeah it would scare the hell out of me if the internet bill, the one bill my rich wife has tasked me with is due and I've only been paid $18 for my last gig.
38 comments
1 ObsessiveMuso 2017-08-30
https://i.imgur.com/7ENLpmc.gif
1 dumbshowreference 2017-08-30
I wish I knew what he was laughing at there. Surely something Ant said.
1 NickDutchNinja 2017-08-30
Ant: Do you still go over to Dealey Plaza when you're in Dallas? Jimmy: I went last time with Kenny, we- Ant: Wish you went with Kennedy. Because you know, he was the one who died... (Pause) Club Soda Kennedy. Ant does Club Soda Kenny impression: Oops, I dropped my brain... Jimmy does Club Soda Kenny impression: Ask not what I should do for this country because I won't remember... Ant: Jackie O is on the trunk lid with a pair of tweezers.
1 dmix 2017-08-30
Surely something... Opie... didn't say? I don't know.
1 laurens_tits 2017-08-30
You are evil and going to hell. Keep it up.
1 NickDutchNinja 2017-08-30
1 TinKnockinMoroccan 2017-08-30
Redoing a roof also takes skill and hard work.
1 PaintedPicture 2017-08-30
Like Anthony
1 onemancrimespree 2017-08-30
Why would he accept a booking for a dollar amount higher than what it would cost him to get to that city?
1 cbanks420lol 2017-08-30
"I'd prob scare hell out of you if you knew how much I get paid sometimes"
Fucking Christ. He deserves this.
1 porsalin 2017-08-30
Some serious Opie-level delusion
1 tellingstart 2017-08-30
I was feeling kind of sorry for him before but he's not only trying to get people to be his club and agent he's also unwilling to quote a price to rip them off for as much as he can.
Do you get paid a lot sometimes Joe? Do you? Then why are you enthusiastically emailing a guy about doing a 15-person bachelor party?
1 Belchides 2017-08-30
Yeah it would scare the hell out of me if the internet bill, the one bill my rich wife has tasked me with is due and I've only been paid $18 for my last gig.
1 RapistWithAIDS 2017-08-30
You mean his "rich" wife.
Can poor and middle class people stop fucking describe ourselves by carelessly using the word "rich" to deceive any person or family who has an above average income?
Nobody who has to wake up to an alarm five days a week is "rich". Nobody who has a boss is "rich". Rich is waking up st 2pm on a Thursday then flying first class to a top-storey EDM rave in Dubai because you felt like it that day.
"My wife works as a psychologist, so she's rich." This is why the elite laughs at us like the fucking pathetic, impoverished ants that we are.
1 Belchides 2017-08-30
I thought she was legitimately rich as in 6 figures a year.
1 Randal_X 2017-08-30
Preach Brother Rapist.
1 InHell1979 2017-08-30
Right?! I fucking screamed at the screen when I read this.
1 Phantas_Magorical 2017-08-30
This is some insidious shit you're pulling
1 UnfunnyFaggott 2017-08-30
Doesn't know the difference between affect and effect. Sad!
1 Jim_Morton 2017-08-30
I wish you'd affect the trigger of a shotgun
1 thndr87 2017-08-30
This dude is going to kill himself
1 jofreal 2017-08-30
Hopefully he doesn't take out his family beforehand.
1 TinKnockinMoroccan 2017-08-30
Watch out, master conman Joe Materese is going to take you for everything you own.
1 porsalin 2017-08-30
He'll be sorely disappointed with that haul.
1 4_leaf_tbag 2017-08-30
What happen to the original post? "Fake-Booking Joe Matarese"
1 porsalin 2017-08-30
It's still around
1 4_leaf_tbag 2017-08-30
I can see it when i click on your name but not on the page. Mods may of deleted or its just me. log out and see if you can find it.
1 porsalin 2017-08-30
Yeah - mods took it down. Guess it breaks the reddit rules or something?
1 CaptainJeanLucPeckah 2017-08-30
I want to suck your dick for torturing this nothing.
1 Belchides 2017-08-30
Damone: *"This is Great!"
1 jofreal 2017-08-30
This would be a good plot for a horror movie with dark comedy undertones. Hack comedian offered generous sum for private backyard gig; arrives at Leatherface estate in middle of nowhere where audience consists of Manson Family castoffs. Midway through routine he gets bum-rushed, and remainder of film is about him being sadistically tortured Hostel-style.
1 Doc_McCoyXYZ 2017-08-30
Hopefully it ends for Joe like it ended for Justin Long in Tusk.
1 paulallens 2017-08-30
Why hasn't this been done with Brother Joe or Sherrod yet? Those faggots deserve this shit way more than this no name idiot.
1 alternative_faps 2017-08-30
The ol' "I don't want to lowball myself to I'd rather make you name a price first" trick. He's a cerebral ninja, isn't he?
1 all_copacetic 2017-08-30
Immediately after he received this email, you know that Joe raced into the living room where his exhausted wife was passed out after working a 20 hour shift; and shouted "See? I told you I'd make it! I've already had two bookings! Now I'm gonna be the one paying YOU pocket money! Who's the loser now?" I'd be very surprised if she hasn't already resorted to stealing opiates from cancer patients.
1 PaintedPicture 2017-08-30
This is the best thing the subs done in a while
1 Toss__Pot 2017-08-30
I wonder if he'd consider a gig in England, hmmm
1 BigDummyIsSexy 2017-08-30
"me and the groom" are you trying to book him at a gay wedding? Thats even better lol
1 porsalin 2017-08-30
Some serious Opie-level delusion
1 tellingstart 2017-08-30
I was feeling kind of sorry for him before but he's not only trying to get people to be his club and agent he's also unwilling to quote a price to rip them off for as much as he can.
Do you get paid a lot sometimes Joe? Do you? Then why are you enthusiastically emailing a guy about doing a 15-person bachelor party?
1 Belchides 2017-08-30
Yeah it would scare the hell out of me if the internet bill, the one bill my rich wife has tasked me with is due and I've only been paid $18 for my last gig.
1 InHell1979 2017-08-30
Right?! I fucking screamed at the screen when I read this.