Functioning Alcoholic: Morning's are the worst
14 2017-07-31 by crookedmile
After working all weekend (40hrs), I'm up at 8:30am doing the same, but with 3 talls left (2 warm, so they're soaking in ice). It's a problem. Not the booze, but that stores here can't sell until after 9am.
40 comments
1 deanthecleanmachine 2017-07-31
you worked 40 hours in 2 days?
1 crookedmile 2017-07-31
Didn't sleep since Friday, just put on The Office in the background and went from there. It's not really heathy, but I can take days off during the week and lie about what I got done.
1 turnthemaround 2017-07-31
Reconsider that. Apparently new science in this area shows that people can't really "catch up" on sleep. So staying up just damages the body and there's no recuperating. It's a big issue with surgeons and they're still trying to figure out how to do scheduling for them.
1 crookedmile 2017-07-31
Well this is a fine how-do-you-do
1 turnthemaround 2017-07-31
I don't know what's more damaging, the binge drinking (which would depend on quantity anyway) or lack of sleep. I know both cause irreversible brain damage. Probably why you post here.
2 crookedmile 2017-07-31
Accurate
1 TossyMcSalad 2017-07-31
I thought this sub was about secret gay hookups
1 I_Hate_Knickers_Deux 2017-07-31
2 birds.
1 TossyMcSalad 2017-07-31
Double entendre
1 I_Hate_Knickers_Deux 2017-07-31
Yes I do you dirty little boy.
1 PepperTheCentaur 2017-07-31
I imagine this guy as more of a defrost the sausage patties for Mcmuffins kind of fella instead of a brain surgeon, but what do I know.
1 crookedmile 2017-07-31
Naw, I'm more of a guy who deals with global GRC tech. I also have a bottle of Jack thanks to the punjab down the street.
1 BoongChook 2017-07-31
Hahaha haven't heard that slur in years.
1 turnthemaround 2017-07-31
Imagine the horror as you're counting back from 10 for brain surgery and you see your surgeon shitposting here on his phone.
1 A_Friendly_Creeper 2017-07-31
So you're just off-site working at home? Sounds awesome.
1 TheGhostOfAbeVigoda 2017-07-31
Okay? What the fuck do you want us to do about it?
1 crookedmile 2017-07-31
Nothing really, just figured I'd throw it out there.
1 52017 2017-07-31
He's sharing his life with us.
1 I_Hate_Knickers_Deux 2017-07-31
I bet she's lovely.
1 Cream_P 2017-07-31
Thats the Lady Di breakfast of champions. Soon enough you'll be sailing the open seas.
1 BoongChook 2017-07-31
Just go down to the pub mate.
1 boring_oneliner 2017-07-31
If you were functioning, you would have a cold liquor stash.
1 ricswrangler 2017-07-31
Why don't you just quit?
1 crookedmile 2017-07-31
I'm building a house on a lake and need the money. Plus, I actually like my job. I just cram a shit-ton in a session so I can go out and do stuff.
1 ricswrangler 2017-07-31
I meant the drinking silly goose
1 crookedmile 2017-07-31
You rascal!
1 I_Hate_Knickers_Deux 2017-07-31
Have a drink.
1 crookedmile 2017-07-31
I will!
1 Steamer1000 2017-07-31
As someone that's been in your spot you are bordering on non functional.
1 crookedmile 2017-07-31
And yet, I'm fully functional. Time-zones amirite??
1 Steamer1000 2017-07-31
Best of luck you you.
1 I_Hate_Knickers_Deux 2017-07-31
Dont give him my luck I need it for the lottery
1 Steamer1000 2017-07-31
I hope you win gord.
1 crookedmile 2017-07-31
I'll be around to haunt you
1 Jungies 2017-07-31
Wrap 'me in a wet paper towel and put them in front of the air vent in the freezer - forced convection and evaporation will cool them quicker than just plain ice water.
1 Mu_Scevich 2017-07-31
Always keep an all-purpose bottle of hard liquor on hand. Preferably vodka. When you wake to pee in the middle of the night (or whenever you wake up from the blackout), hit a couple swigs off it and go back to bed. When you wake up for work the next day you'll be right in the pocket. No hangover, but not non-functioning drunk either. Start your day. You can usually make it to lunch before you'll need a maintenance drink to finish your work day. Switch it up to a beer or two. Then after work, off the races again. Rinse, repeat. Always repeat...
1 crookedmile 2017-07-31
Here's the thing, I normally do this. But the dot heads down the block sell pints that beat the price of a 750 when you buy 2, so all I'm left with is extra resources. It's a lot of maintenance. Save the planet man.
1 A_Friendly_Creeper 2017-07-31
That's why it's easier to be unemployed.
1 David_Tosk 2017-07-31
This doesn't sound that functional. How's the job, school, wife, kids?
Also, what do you drink?
1 Ippi_Boy 2017-07-31
Can't drink all day if you don't start in the morning
1 Steamer1000 2017-07-31
Best of luck you you.
1 I_Hate_Knickers_Deux 2017-07-31
I bet she's lovely.