r/opieandanthony - what crazy conspiracy theory do you actually believe?

12  2017-07-01 by LoouisCuCK

I believe that "Swine Flu" was a media invention. Who do you know who died of Swine Flu? Nobody? That's what I thought. Why would the media subject the country to such a dastardly deed? They were in a slow news slump. What better then a "pandemic" to get those precious viewers? But this did not occur in a vacuum, oh no... Drug companies were looking for an easy buck, and they got one, in the form of the Swine Flu "vaccine" (AKA sterilized water). Did you feel dizzy after the injection? That was the result of the water destroying blood cells. As for the few people who did die, I believe these wretched souls were targeted for their anti-government beliefs... The Swine Flu provided cover for unethical medical testing. The victims were described as being in the prime of their life, and that cytokine storms may have played a role in their deaths, in a manner simmilar with the 1918 Flu Pandemic. I believe that the few people who died were subjected to a revamped version of this disease, and that one day we may even see this disease again, only with non-Americans as the victims. I would like to say that I am not an anti-vaxxer.

I also think that Beyonce was never pregnant. Jay and Beyonce paid a surrogate to have their child for them. This is not to say it isn't theirs (Blue Ivy bears a clear resemblance to her father), it is 100% their child genetically, but Beyonce did not actually give birth to it. There is a video where her stomach mysteriously "deflates". A redditor on a conspiracy thread also said that he had a friend who worked for an airport during the time of her pregnancy. They arrived, and the friend noted that Beyonce did not look pregnant at all, despite it being late in her pregnancy (they also were apparently quite rude to the staff). There is another video of Bey where she "shows off" her pregnant body... yet for some reason it is in a dark room, and the camera focuses on her stomach for but a moment. They rented an entire hospital ward to give birth in (this part actually makes some sense even without the rest, celebs are obviously weary of the press, who knows what a paparazzo might try). There was some claim that other pregnant mothers were forced out of said ward at the last minute. Why would they go through all this trouble? Beyonce requires a good, athletic body for her music videos and live performances. No better way to ruin that than a pregnancy. She has also crafted a careful image of powerful femininity. She is a role model to woman everywhere. What could be more feminine, more motherly, then bringing a child into this world? We all know how catty woman can be, especially towards other woman. If you think there aren't woman who would hold this against Bey, you're wrong.

80 comments

The Holocaust

more people need to start believing that this is real

i mean, it's not like we're saying the earth is flat or the moon is hollow. 6 mil Jews were disintegrated at an unprovable rate because germans were fueled by hate for long noses and lizardly teeth

That Opie and Anthony wasn't a hack show.

HERECOMESLINE OF THE DAY

That's a part of the show now? Who does that? - Anthony on the Chip Chipperson Podacast

I was diagnosed with swine flu. You get really sick and a bit of a rash on your legs, was fine in a week

Gets a rash on his legs.

It must be swine flu.

Checks out.

I went to the doctor

He diagnosed me after blood tests

Does check out

Doctors never lie.

Why would he be wrong but you right?

Eh, who is to say you could not have been suffering from a more generic version of the flu?

because he has no reason to lie to me. He didnt sell me medication. He told me I had swine, and said to treat this like a regular sickness. Tons of water and soup. If it got worse Id ho on medication. I got my vaccines when I was young so when I get sick now, my immune system can be prepared to fight the sickness. Get up!

I got my vaccines when I was young so when I get sick now, my immune system can be prepared to fight the sickness.

Well, your doctor was one of the good ones... You say you got your vaccine when you were younger, but you realize that the Swine Flu Vaccine only became available during 2009? The vaccines you got when you were younger were probably for the seasonal occurrence of the flu. The Swine Flu was (supposedly) a different strain.

so because the vaccine was made in 2009, its fake; but a vaccine in, oh idk 1955 was the only real one?

When it was made is irrelevant, I am just saying that the Swine Flu craze became a thing in 2009, and that for every different variant of flu, there must be a different vaccination.

Also, you realize that doctors recommend a yearly flu vaccination, right? If you have not had one since you were a kid, you may be well overdue for getting another for the upcoming flu season.

before we continue, can you stop starting your arguments, "you realize...., right?" lets talk like the dummies we are. There are different variations for every illness because we know how to fight them. they get stronger. a kid I went to highschool, who at the time, was one of my best friends, his dad was on the team that sent out the vaccine after months of working on a successful one to release.

Vaccinations arent like oil changes, once you have one, youre good for the rest of your life. unless you have aids your immune system will do its job if youre healthy enough. You get vaccinations as a child because your immune system is developing. If youre getting them as an adult, (yearly) for the same illnesses, youre just wasting money. Vaccinations isnt a billion dollar industry.

https://www.cdc.gov/flu/index.htm

The CDC and World health org recommend yearly vaccinations

Have you ever heard of booster shots?

Fair point. Personally, I get sick once a year and follow the steps and beat in a week. All from one vaccine. Still doesnt mean that the swine flu was fake. In fact, that shows that the swine flu was a very strong strain that they want you to get vaccinations regularly so you dont die from the sickness

Because the different variants of the influenza virus are easily distinguishable through RNA analysis.

Or it was a pharma invention intended to sell millions of dollars worth of useless vaccines and the media was handed their scripts as usual.

vaccines arent useless you dope. Bacteria and illness are real things. We just live in a country where we wash our hands after whiping our asses meanwhile 3rd world shit holes go from digging out a cows ass to marinating chicken and eating with no silverware

That one was you dope.

good one, chip

Well someone as versed in vaccination knowledge as yourself would know that the cdc is shooting in the dark on various mutations every year. The U.S. spent a billion dollars on that particular mutation. They logically could use the same argument every year to spend that much. However you can only get away with a heist like that every so often.

Tell the class how you know this

Off topic but I have some anthrax vaccines and ebola bio suits for sale. PM me for details.

exactly. save the conspiracies to 9/11 and jews

That is more or less my line of thought. I diverge by thinking that in the grips of the craze, unethical medical testing was performed.

Vaccines work but if you wanted to infect an entire population with something, vaccines would be a brilliant way to do it.

I never claimed to be anit vaxxer so i took a beating based on presumption. I make sure my kid gets his shots. But every other year the cdc announces that they picked the wrong strain of flu so the vaccine they shot into millions of Americans was completely useless. The manufacturers get their check either way.

Patrice did not die of natural causes. He was assassinated.

schumer killed him for his jokes

History's first assassination via candy bar

That woke brotha spoke too much truth about the illuminati and they had the nigga killed like Pac and Dave Chappelle.

i agree, but it's that much harder do prove because it was most likely done one Arnold Palmer & pack of skittles at a time

they knew Patrice better than he knew himself and his genes

(((Swine Flu))). (((Beyonce was never pregnant)))).

Civilians did 911.

Opie could not shoot the lights out.

I genuinely believe Alex Jones is Bill Hicks. I think he was given secret cancer treatments and in exchange he became a tool used to discredit real conspiracy theories by building a following of complete idiots.

Does alex jones look 55 yrs old to you?

He looks closer to 55 than he does to 43.

I 100% believe Kurt Cobain didn't commit suicide. Dead men don't pull triggers. The funny part is I never really liked or cared about him or Nirvana. Hugely overrated if you ask me.I happened upon justiceforkurt.com(links dead for some reason) like 10-15 years ago and it all just made sense. Then this documentary Soaked in Bleach came out. Great documentary shedding light on the truth.

Look into it for real. Dead men don't pull triggers.

The supposed triggerman was a dude named "El Duce" from a band called "The Mentors." I saw them a couple weeks before he died. That was a weird-ass concert, a real "GG Allin" kind of vibe.

*"The half-live Sex Drugs & Rock 'n' Roll came out in 1989 on Ever Rat Records, and before they could tour behind it they were contacted by Ministry's Al Jourgenson about possibly touring together. This led to the Mentors scoring the opening slot on the Revolting Cocks tour, a supergroup made up of industrial artists such as Trent Reznor, Jeff Ward, and Jourgenson. The tour was an exercise in debauchery, and the group was more than ready to further that image. Two more self-released albums followed, but oddly enough they would stop recording new material after 1992 despite staying together. El Duce was kicked off the drums during this period, as his drinking was beginning to hinder their live performances, and was replaced by various friends of the band. He did get to keep his job as their singer, and began incorporating live sex acts on-stage since he was free from behind the drum kit. Each member worked on various other projects throughout the mid-'90s, but the band stayed together for live performances.

By 1997, El Duce looked as though he was ready for a media comeback, as he made headlines by claiming that Courtney Love offered him 10,000 dollars to kill Kurt Cobain. Love did not even justify his comments with a response, but they did know each other from the Seattle club scene. In January of the same year, he had a memorable appearance on The Jerry Springer Show where he brought out an underage groupie, took credit for the sexual assault of an audience member, and was condemned by fellow Springer guests Gwar for his pro-rape comments. But on April 19 of that year, he stepped in front of a train behind his California home while intoxicated and was killed. Most believe the incident was an accident, as El Duce was legendary for his drunken exploits. "*

The Mentors rule.

I remember that there was a theory that Jimi Hendrix was murdered. Something about stuff that was stolen from his apartment, and that he was on bad terms with someone from a record company. I'd have to look into details to remember what else was said.

That doc was really compelling, Grant is very credible and meticulous. The one that Courtney released around the same time was garbage, and of course she's prominently featured.

I've heard everything that doc was about be reasonably debunked. I used to think it was fishy at least but now im pretty sure the dude just checked out

If Courtney Love wanted him dead, why did she save him when he OD'd like a month prior to him dying? She saved him from a legitimate death that she had no involvement in just so she could do something that could have possibly lead to her being arrested a month later?

I know this post is a day-old now, but the counter-point to what you said is apparently Courtney learned that Kurt was serious about divorcing her. Also, I read/heard that she learned that Kurt liked some girl who was around or in Courtney's band.

I personally don't think Kurt murdered him. I just think they were both shitty drug addicts, and most likely horrible people to hangout with, whether you like their music or not.

Where is your evidence he was dead before he got shot? If you think it's because of the heroin concentration in his blood, why would the murderer shoot him at all? He's already dead and a hardcore junkie ODing will not exactly raise suspicion.

I believe R. Kelly & Anthony Cumia are the same person. I not only don't believe in the moon landings but I don't believe the moon exist, it's just a hologram created by the elites to control the masses. I believe OJ was framed & that Ron & Nicole are still alive & were government actors used by the globalist to bring down American hero OJ Simpson. I believe gummy bears are the work of the devil.

Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone. Bugliosi proved it in his book.

Isn't this considered the usual explanation though (I am agnostic on what happened)?

Did he say anything of his motives?

He was crazy commie who wanted to feel important and help the USSR.

and now 54 years later fans of Bernie Panders want to turn us into a knock off of that shit ;)

i dont know what you mean but i will stand behind you that Bernie supporter ARE commies, while Trump supporters are just faggots and Hillary supporters don't actually exist except as a vent to hate Drumpf

Isn't that the official story though?

Thank you, so I don't have to berate that point. Thinking JFK assassination was a conspiracy is so hack

Carl Ruiz is a successful restauranteur and chef.

In other words, this thread is "post your schizophrenia".

kys

KKTITN

Bam Margera fucked Lynsi Hughes.

That video of the Sandy Hook people walking in circles is pretty crazy. And the guy next doors story changing a million times. And the lack of winter decorations and that the school appears to be delapodated. More weird stuff there ...

Can you explain more because I'm lazy and don't want to use google.

Just watch "We Need to Talk About Sandy Hook" or if you'd rather an eccentric nigger narrate, search "TeamWakeEmUp Sandy Hook EXPOSED"

They let 911 happen

Also that they perpetuate all that 911 detail shit like thermite paint and the like to make everyone who says anything about 911 look like a retard

The old marbles up the ass theory

Opie and Anthony sabotaged the comeback of former Def Jam comic Alonzo "Hamburger" Jones in 2008 because the regulars at the Cellar were intimidated by his new material.

Opie is talented

Depression isn't a disease and antidepressants don't do anything (but harm people)

depression is an illness equal to faggotry. But of course one is accepted without pills for a cure

They make you cum slower

Found joyomis new account

Your words hurt me :(

Found joyomis new account

[removed]

I believe Charlize Theron is secretly a huge racist who fled South Africa after the end of apartheid because she knew how the niers would end up behaving, and her black "husband" and "kids" are an elaborate ruse to throw us off the truth. And if she was a nier lover for real, she'd have a black love interest in at least one movie.

PATTON OSWALT...

Blacks are people.

I don't believe for one single goddamn momentary second that Patrice was buried in a purple suit in an extra large coffin! I believe some short little bully ass nigga held him up for the purple track suit and shoes and made him lay there in his long johns in a shallow roadside grave and was last seen laughing with some other niglet around the corner. Later heard that nigga got shot or sumthin?

so because the vaccine was made in 2009, its fake; but a vaccine in, oh idk 1955 was the only real one?