"Attention all homos! I am a fit healthy gay man and I have NOT EVER had sex. I am in my mid twenties. I have not fucked a single male or female.

I am a deeply conservative anarcho-primitivist and I am looking for another pure Aryan gay male virgin to dom. I want to be clear... YOU WILL NOT BE PERMITTED TO TOP ME. Your testosterone levels could not reach mine even if you injected it straight into your balls, and for that reason you will be my house husband.

We will live on a large property in a rural wooded area as hunter gatherers. I will provide for you and you will cook what I kill and suck me. We will not pay our taxes. Don't worry because I will train you in ways to fend off IRS hitmen.

If this appeals to you then return to this road on the next full moon to listen for more details. End transmission."