What are the chances Anthony ends up living in a duplex?

19  2017-05-08 by TonyFromLongIsland

I've never wanted to see anything more in my life.

16 comments

Sun is shining in the sky, there ain't a clooooooouuuud in sight

in North Carolina

His liver is weeks away from failing, I think he'll die in that house with $100 in his bank account and a bottle of rum and 5 beers in the cooler he's using as a footrest

I just hope his failing organs hold out long enough for him to blow every last cent. Joe and Dawn get nothing.

It'll be in a van down by the river.

Duplexes are pricey

This story only ends well if it's in mastic or Shirley

Mastic would be hight of irony. Or funny. Something that ends in y.

duplex? double-wide trailer maybe

Here's how it will happen. Im the not too distant future, someone on here will catch a whisper of a hush-hush, private sale of a Long Island home. It won't be listed in MLS, and shown only by appointment. Anthony will start hinting that in order to remain competitive, he must live full time at the "Compound West", & try to convince everyone through numerous shows & endless tweets that he is not downsizing but streamlining. He'll cover the repossession of his Jaguar as him letting the lease expire & there's no real need for a car like that in NYC. He'll use private car services for a while until money continues to tighten... but by the time he's seen on a crosstown bus, staring blankly out the window while Bobo sits too close to him and blabbers about the Mets, it's too late. There hasn't been a new show signed to compound media in the last 2 years. The remaining shows are spending more & more air time on other outlets. The only show sign that remains in the lobby is Anthony's, with just clean squares of drywall surrounding it where the other shows' signs once hung. Anthony spends more show time defending their right to pursue their own careers & wishes them the best of luck at increasingly frequent rates on his own show. His rants get longer & more angry. He's stopped taking callers. The bleachers are filled with boxes of crap he's forced to sell on his show to keep the lights on. The booth is empty; Garrett was the last to stop showing up to work. Anthony fumbles to work the cameras, media clips, & google searches with one hand while he holds a glass of box wine with the other. 4 pm comes one Monday, & the website is dark.

Why would he sell the house he's paid off to rent an apartment?

High five figures taxes, friendo

Plus the cost of heating that pool and jacuzzi from April until November, and the electric to run it; that'll be the first things to turn off in order to cut costs.

No need to pay those taxes to give home to a swamp in his yard for 6 months a year.

Why would he rent an apartment, when he's already got one.

I hope a huuuge rowdy, half black, half Hispanic family lives in the other half of the building.

Tony has FU money. He won't end up in a duplex. A prison cell is much more likely.

He will come out as a raving homosexual move to Christopher street catch aids and die alone!!

It would be cute if he and his roommate nicknamed it a "Sue-plex"