Doug Benson's retarded fans vol.2

23  2017-03-25 by Jokkijokk

So this is youtube comments taken from an episode of Doug Benson's "Weed, bong rips and inane conversations " He's solo in this one because the guests didn't show up. Here we go:

iambism: When you do the solo shows you should smoke hash or oil. Kick it up a little.

In reference to one of the most retarded bits i've seen in ages, beats the "Sherrod's late entrance" bit:

Sean Isbell: does anyone else say JAMBO randomly throughout the day? Paul Meranda: lol totally

Vegaspsycho: You should start having joint rolling contests between you and your guests and then you can collect them all and have a display with every guest's hand rolled joint on it. Josh Dye: that is genius

 Anonymous: That bong is so neglected the whole time :( such a pretty bong too shame shame

 Awesome: Face Started loosing my shit the moment u came on the screen, looking high as fuck already hahahgahgahaha

antihero: doug, you should get a classic rastafarian smoking chalice and try to chief it like a true rastfari man. gets you so irie

 Slim Jim: x2 the video speed many lols, not better then 0.5 speed though ;D

59 comments

n/a  Phantas_Magorical 2017-03-25

Great thread, really shows how much better I am than these pussies. Now back to the kratom.

n/a  throwawizzlemahnizzl 2017-03-25

Spoken like a wildman.

n/a  stinksskc 2017-03-25

That red boreno son

n/a  TheGhostOfAbeVigoda 2017-03-25

I don't get Doug Benson. For one, his whole unfunny dumb ass pot head shtick annoys me. And that's coming from a guy who smokes weed daily, but I just don't really talk about it, because honestly, who gives a shit? Second, the guy isn't even good at it. He'll smoke two pipes and be off his ass stoned and I've never once seen him smoke a bong. I really don't see the appeal at all. Also, his face genuinely pisses me off.

n/a  carribbeanjimmy 2017-03-25

I remember hearing somewhere that he didn't even try weed until his 30's, and it instantly became his whole identity. Which explains why he's so douchey about it. The adult version of a 16 year old who started smoking pot 6 months ago.

n/a  JMueller2012 2017-03-25

And keep in mind he's like 64

n/a  onemancrimespree 2017-03-25

Have to admit 1 thing about Doug, he looks incredible for his age, even if he looks terrible either way.

n/a  bonniesretardsister 2017-03-25

He was a movie extra and wanted to be professional with that incredibly demanding job.

n/a  bonniesretardsister 2017-03-25

Yep. You can blame Greg Proops for making him smoke a joint with him.

n/a  AppleBonfire 2017-03-25

You're a big pharma shill! Weed cures cancer and is totally harmless and if you suggest anything else then you are a brainwashed corporate robot. Weed expands the consciousness and has never negatively effected anybody in any way.

n/a  xyniphis 2017-03-25

The Kevin Smith's guide to weed use and cringy try-hardism.

n/a  fapworld 2017-03-25

Same shit with Rogan, if you don't try pot before the age of 15 you'll just end up fuckin retarded.

n/a  TrackSuitVos 2017-03-25

Someone posted old standups of his from the early 90's. It seemed very much like "you ever been in line at the bank" phony Seinfeld shit.

n/a  dwc151 2017-03-25

You mean 16 year old Jim Norton.

n/a  packitchofsositch 2017-03-25

And that's coming from a guy who smokes weed daily, but I just don't really talk about it, because honestly, who gives a shit?

I did for a few years when I was a teenager, and Cypress Hill, which references weed all the time was my favorite rap group. Even then I wished they'd shut the fuck up about "mary jane". It was just dumb.

I loved the way it smelled and looked, and it was the best feeling when you got a new bag of it. But wtf is the point of obsessing about it all the time? It'd be like talking about your favorite beer non-stop.

Don't get it.

n/a  segasarnold 2017-03-25

Doug Benson cant hit a bong https://youtu.be/nT_56Qi-8_c?t=6m57s

n/a  TheGhostOfAbeVigoda 2017-03-25

Jesus...That was fucking pathetic.

n/a  segasarnold 2017-03-25

I hate how when he holds in his hits as well like its going to keep getting him higher. Depriving your brain of oxygen for a noble cause.

n/a  Lokque 2017-03-25

The worst part is he's holding them in longer so he can look tough by not coughing, but coughing expands the lungs allowing them to absorb more THC by exposing more surface area to it; so he's just entirely fucking retarded.

n/a  ventio 2017-03-25

am i high or does the bitch on the far right have he-man legs

n/a  TedsEmporiumEmporium 2017-03-25

Third: he's a huge bitch and gets pissed off easily.

n/a  whatisthishere 2017-03-25

Norm Macdonald talks about him, and he says you would think the guy would be really good at smoking weed, that's his entire shtick, but he's not, he gets high as hell, and he has a fucked up eye, which makes him look even more high.

n/a  STLblue 2017-03-25

antihero: doug, you should get a classic rastafarian smoking chalice and try to chief it like a true rastfari man. gets you so irie

Why is he trying so hard to pack as many douchisms into one comment as possible? He should get melanoma for his username alone.

n/a  throwawizzlemahnizzl 2017-03-25

He should only get cancer! I hope he gets cancer!

n/a  Lux_cs 2017-03-25

"THC cures cancer maaaan."

n/a  DonDimelo 2017-03-25

Rastafarianism! https://youtu.be/TcK0MYgnHjo

n/a  HitEmWTheHeinnn 2017-03-25

I want to fart in Slim Jim's mouth, and not in a sexual way

n/a  Jokkijokk 2017-03-25

Do it in 0.1 speed

n/a  bonniesretardsister 2017-03-25

Vegaspsycho: You should start having joint rolling contests between you and your guests and then you can collect them all and have a display with every guest's hand rolled joint on it. Josh Dye: that is genius

I don't know who I want to brain with a hammer more.

n/a  TriangleDimes 2017-03-25

The only valid reason would be to compare them and see if sinister Jewish fingers roll differently. I suspect they do.

n/a  1475315963 2017-03-25

sinister Jewish fingers

haha

n/a  nawtfunny 2017-03-25

teehee

n/a  ok-kid 2017-03-25

  • he got really popular after that documentary thing he did came out. The one where he stops smoking weed for like 30 days then goes all out smoking. "Super High Me".

  • after that he was everywhere. Then slowly I stopped hearing about him as much.

  • I worked at Bonnaroo and saw him do stand up there. It was funny but nothing amazing

  • when his 'get Doug with high' YouTube thing came out, I thought it was pretty dumb. It could be better if he wasn't so spaced out.

  • his stock has def been falling the past few years. Does he do movies? I'm assuming all he does is stand up and that YouTube channel...

n/a  bonniesretardsister 2017-03-25

He has a terrible Comedy Central show.

n/a  Slippery_Slope_Guy 2017-03-25

I watched 5 minutes of that show. Terrible. Dreadful. Horrible. Just really bad.

n/a  Jokkijokk 2017-03-25

What he does is that he has all these podcasts where the guests always contribute more than him in terms of jokes and often his stand-up consists of him playing these Doug loves movies games with the audience. He's more of a game-show host than anything else. Also he's a pun-comic and even worse is that they're weed puns for the most part, often some weed and movie title mash-up that isnt funny. Weednado and the Weedzard of oz type of shit.

n/a  ChippusMaximus 2017-03-25

It could be better if he wasn't so spaced out.

The man can't hold a proper conversation with his guests. He had Trailer Park Boys on and it was like he didn't hear them every time they tried to respond to his stupid questions and would be half way through a tangent by the time they got 3 words out.

n/a  Radank 2017-03-25

He was also featured on the VH1 culture recap shows a lot. Best Week Ever, I Love The, so on, so forth. I actually remember thinking he was pretty funny on Best Week Ever. He never mentioned weed back then.

n/a  1475315963 2017-03-25

What's JAMBO?

n/a  Jokkijokk 2017-03-25

Everytime someone picks up this little bottle of some cannabisfluid or something named Jambo they play a clip of a guy yelling "Jambo" in a retarded way.

n/a  pepe_built_the_wall 2017-03-25

The High Court stinks. CC is scraping the bottom of the barrel with Doug

n/a  OGcumBoi 2017-03-25

Which is more embarrassing, The High Court or their new show where comedians lip-sync and play dress up?

n/a  pepe_built_the_wall 2017-03-25

Both are equally shitty

n/a  HookerMouth82 2017-03-25

I like both of them.

n/a  jfral 2017-03-25

I heard it's getting cancelled.

n/a  pepe_built_the_wall 2017-03-25

It needs to be cancelled. I think Doug is blowing a CC exec. Only explanation for why it still hasn't been axed

n/a  harnal_the_grayt 2017-03-25

Weed is actually his whole shtick? It's a pretty shallow based for a comedy career. There's only so many pot jokes a person can make.

n/a  obamabeblacknshiet 2017-03-25

But weed, dude.

n/a  CringyQuoteKelvin 2017-03-25

Pot Talk!

n/a  Lux_cs 2017-03-25

Doug is funniest in 0.0 speed

n/a  enzo_trash 2017-03-25

I hate any comic who has a gimmick.

Also hate new weed smokers, buying 10 pipes your first week, then get arrested 6 months later with a bong in the csr

n/a  anaLog1989 2017-03-25

Physically painful douche chills.

n/a  onemancrimespree 2017-03-25

Doug Benson actually harassed me online when his weed documentary first came out, because I made fun of something he posted on facebook. He started messaging me privately and then people on my friends list. It didn't go on longer than a day but it was really strange

n/a  Jokkijokk 2017-03-25

What kind of stuff did he write?

n/a  onemancrimespree 2017-03-25

It was nothing career ending, just vague general insults like calling me a terrible piece of shit, for whatever joke I made about him.

n/a  Jokkijokk 2017-03-25

Not surprising that he's uncreative in the insult department as well.

n/a  Slippery_Slope_Guy 2017-03-25

This made me laugh. What a fucking dork.

n/a  Muted_Post-Horn 2017-03-25

DUDE

n/a  dwc151 2017-03-25

The movie podcast without knowing shit about movies is the most despicable thing about him.

n/a  clay-davis 2017-03-25

Doug Benson makes Joe Rogan look like Bertrand Russell.

n/a  RacistPigeon 2017-03-25

Benson is a cunt, but in the opposite way of teetotaler Norton

n/a  onemancrimespree 2017-03-25

Have to admit 1 thing about Doug, he looks incredible for his age, even if he looks terrible either way.