I used to use Tinder/Bumble to help get laid but recently moved to a small town from the city

8  2017-03-24 by crookedmile

Any app I don't know about? They don't even do GrubHub or Uber our here, so I'm not sure how many rural women use this type of thing. I guess I could go out to a bar, but who needs that headache.

31 comments

How small? I live in a town of like 80k and people used tinder here. I only ever use it in the summertime to try to fuck the Korean/Japanese/Thai qts they import to work the amusement park.

It only worked once and she was nothing special :(

I went from a city of 4 mil to 7k.

Is that one of these trailer parks where the sexual predators have to live?

at least that made it mathematically more feasible for you to rape all the town's women.

My mother dragged me from NY to a 10k rural town for a couple years in high school. Girls in the sticks were way more DTF.

Get a kid haircut and go to class.

Easy to say when you're 29 and living with your mom.

Delafield city !?

Asians won't fuck me.

Found a black listener.

German-wop actually. It was just hard to find girls who were above 18 as a lot of them were actually only 16 or 17 and spoke very little English.

Oh and I'm pretty autistic

Parma ?!

Nope

Yeah, its called bar and a gram of blow

Coke is so fucking expensive in small towns. I'm talking like 80+ a gram. H, oxys and Adderall are cheap though because of the heroin and pill epidemic in the rust belt right now. We had like 50 fall out last year in my small town from H. Ironically it was mostly because a bunch of it was cut with fentanyl and not the usual non-opiate cuts. So a bunch of people booted too much and all dropped within like 2 months.

Yep that sounds about right. Apparently theres a huge market for cheap oxy pills online but theyre really just fent presses. Get a wingman and go halfsies on the blow idk. Its probably shitty too huh? Now im just thinking about getting high not getting laid. To answer your question if there isnt a lot of girls on those apps youre kind of fucked. Your best bet is still gonna be bars but thats just me. Ive never had the confidence to pick up a stranger sober.

You should just tell women you are the dassabesso caller and they will be sitting in a pool of their own cunt juice.

What a wordsmith.

Now hold on: WHAT are the drugs I need to get a girl in a green-billed visor to be a "friend" to me?

Kratom.

And boy do I have good news for you!

If it's as positive as Jenkem, I'm all in.

Ive never really understood the whole cut with fentanyl thing,,,couldnt you just make more money selling that?

You can make more money turning your weaker heroin stronger with fentanyl than just selling it alone. They take H that has already been cut and throw some fentanyl in. It's not like they take pure H and mix it 1:1 with fentanyl.

Roofies are cheaper.

Looks like it's Farmers Only for you

gun.exe

yeah its low effort whaddaya want from me?

Rural women are easy if you keep it discreet, since everyone knows everyone.

I have a traveling job. Basically I'm all over the United States. I've been doing it for eleven years now.

The thing that blew my fucking mind was that I couldn't get a date to save my life in my home town, but getting laid on the road was trivial. I'm not exaggerating, I had three dates in five years in my home town, on the road I could line up three dates in one day.

My 'theory' on this is that 95% of the women on the dating sites are married or in a relationship but they're looking to trade up. That's why I couldn't find anyone local; they were worried that if we dated in "their town" someone might see us out at a bar, or we might have friends in common.

But out on the road? WTF it was like rivers of vagina. I was double shifting on some nights.

BTW, I'm really glad I'm married now, it was kinda depressing realizing that these women were so eager to cheat on their boyfriends or husbands.

EDIT: I didn't explain myself properly. My 'bread and butter' was 30-somethings in rural towns. I literally never-ever-ever managed to have sex with anyone from where I lived, but in these backwaters I was batting a thousand. So if you wanted to copy me, here is what you'd do:

1) set up a dating profile in a city that's far enough away that the girl won't be worried about running into your friends and family. Everyone I met was between 150 and 800 miles from where I lived.

2) Just be a complete douche about how great your life is, how awesome your house is, etc. You're selling her a dream, the dream of getting the fuck out of that shitty town she lives in.

3) Rinse & Repeat

I got into a 'rhythm' of having about three to give girlfriends at once, all over the United States. You could probably take this to an extreme if you wanted to, and have GFs all over the world. I have some opinions on why women fall for this nonsense, if anyone's curious. And I have FB friends that are still falling for this shit, to this day. I have one friend who seems to think she's in "a relationship" with some dude that lives a thousand miles away. A dude who clearly dates other women and is "single" in his status. Women believe what they want to believe.

I think women like "exotic" people rather then some dude in a crappy bar from their home town

I'm sure that plays a part, but mostly they seemed to be trading up. Just off the top of my head:

1) one girl lived with a dude, I found out after we dated for about a month. I wound up moving his stuff out for her.

2) One girl was honest about it, that she had a BF but she 'wasn't feeling it.'

3) One girl had a BF but they weren't "committed"

4) One girl was a straight up booty call, in the entire time I knew here I never saw her in the light of day or took her out. Six months in, she was telling me she wanted to leave her BF for me! That one pissed me off, I can sorta understand the 'trading up' thing, but dumping a perfectly good BF for some dude using you as a cum dumpster is delusional

I could go on and on an on. Hypergamy Is A Thing

Volunteering, especially with kids or animals, attracts women of higher moral fiber who enjoy getting spanked for misbehaving. Source.

Or you could start perfecting your apple crumble recipe for the county fair.

Just dangle your peckah out your window

What a wordsmith.