Good bless you

Oh my.. she just keeps doing it.

Wow her management just don't give a fuck either they just keep cashing in

piggy has more in common with trump than her army of sjw's who confuse being a whore with being empowered would care to admit

It's almost like some morally bankrupt serial shoplifter took up stand up comedy and ended up continuing their depraved thievery by stealing the art of the comics they surround themselves with.

It's because she used to do real work and was funny, but she can't write in the voice of this super earnest PC character she's portrayed in the last three or four years. She submitted to them for easy fame and dug herself a hole in the process.

Great point

You mean Jesilnik used to do real work and was funny?

The stories of her stealing are from long before she was big (lol) and are too specific to just be made up out of anger.

If she's willing to steal from stores, steal beer from dudes her age, and then when confronted about it, spread lies about those people until they are physically harmed, yeah, I think she'd still material from other comedians.

I don't think she really cares about anyone except herself and her own fame. My only solace is that she also probably hates herself and feels like shit any time she's alone. Good.

I think you'll find it's actually is like that and that you're wrong by saying it's almost like that.

Why hasn't Joe Rogan gone full Mencia on her yet?

fucking stop it guys she's too brave she doesn't need this!

it takes a brave person to be that pathetic.

She is so nice to other comics though. How could she be nice to comedians and then also steal jokes and be all around not funny? SUCH A WORLD ISN'T POSSIBLE!

Nice editing OP. I'm sure the good folks over over at /r/videos would appreciate your work as well

Stop! Thief!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

She moves with the grace of latter day Andre the Giant

I don't know what's worse - the fact that no one tells her these jokes aren't original or tells her to cover her arms.

Those disgusting slabs literally made her rich. They're her brand.

Stealing this comment to point out that the Amy defenders are out in full force https://www.reddit.com/r/videos/comments/5zfnr8/comment/dexq7rv

It fucking infuriates me that people are trying to defend her. Genuine hatred for them.

they look like legs

Did you see The Last King of Scotland? She had a cameo.

Imagine being an Amy Schumer Yes Gay. Cause you know she wants to collect as many gay dudes as possible to tell her she is "fierce."

"Anybody want a peanut? Or a couple of jars of peanut butter and 3 loaves of white bread? And some chocolate. And a vat of lard?"

See, because she's a fatter, greedier Fezzik.

One time Amy drank 100 beers in a sitting and passed out in a hotel lobby and they put a table cloth over her since no one could move her

It's still real to me, damnit!

What a beast!

The Hulkster's not gonna' be able to body-slam that, brother-Jack dude!

So dead?

The real question is - WHEN IS SHE GONNA START DOING FAT JOKES?????

She moves with the grace of Andre the Giant current year

What a despicable Jew rodent.

she should work in a diner in the middle of nowhere.

Traditionally diners are expected to hold large stocks of food. This wouldn't work.

Her delivery is top notch

IN DIS JARRRR !!!!!

I don't think anyone could have gone in a worse direction with that one if they tried. What an abject failure. I wish 'epic fail' wasn't outdated, because that was a biggie.

"As a comic". See, you and I normal folk would never come up with a line like "Jar!"

She's been doing it since she was 18...SNORT

Starting a "joke" with that is infuriating. Just show us you're a comic; don't tell us.

She's just relating to her fanbase who invariable preface their shitty opinions with "As an X..."

I know, I'd be like all "IN DIS GLASS CONTAINER WITH A SCREW-ON LID!!". She's so funny and smart. Brave too.

"as a comedian..."

What a dumb thing to say as a comedian on stage.

As a comedic xerox machine

I was thinking "he said fishbowl, i wonder what whacky thing shes gonna change it to..."

...jar

that seriously shattered my low expectations

You don't think a jar is as wacky a place to cum?

Speaking of a jar that's what I wish Amy's skull was

sad that this joke was better than the entire special

are you saying i should write a special

tssyeah, special ed or somthin

Good one, Chip.

could be an autobiography

FAWKIN HALARIOUS

Hmmmm, where would a funny place be to cum....hmmm....a......a jar?

I don't even care about the thievery. The massive difference in funniness and the way it exposes how horribly untalented she is is more than worth it. I hope she keeps doing it. That difference is fucking humiliating.

I think she's trying to get fat enough to start stealing Melissa McCarthy's roles.

I've never seen her try those Matt Foley moves before this unwatchable shit pile of a special.

Hopefully after this bomb of a special Big Amy will be living in a van down by the river.

Or dead on a hotel room floor.

"Amy is a friend" - Earthworm Jim.

But yet South Park 100% stole his AIDS joke because nobody ever made a "AIDS is a great weight loss tool" joke before Jim Norton. Sam Kinison didn't get nominated for a Grammy doing it or anything.

Does that make Amy Queen Slug-for-a-butt?

OH NO

Jesus fucking Christ, look at those fucking linebacker shoulders. That's even worse than being just fat. She's built like a vending machine.

I know. It's hot.

Tss more like cold or sumthin

You wouldn't fuck her? I'd like to see who you pounded last.

Can you and your fellow faggots who arrived here from /r/all please fuck off

Nigga I've been listening to Anthony Cumia since I was a teenager

Fuck off with that shit

You're definitely still a teenager

100% absolutely not. You can tell it's a fucking mess down there. Probably cold and not as wet as it should be.

You wouldn't fuck her?

Why is this always a go-to defense for some people? Yes, I am sure many of us would fuck her and many of us have fucked much worse looking behemoths than Amy Schumer in our lifetimes. This sub is also full of degenerate alcoholics and pillheads who are dropping dead at an alarming rate. Does any of that somehow mean that Amy Schumer isn't a walking sack of filth?

I'm all in with the pills

Well a lot of the hate is centered on her appearance instead of how fucking awful her last special was.

Ooooooo

Lol, you act like she's even average. She's objectively overweight by a substantial margin. There are plenty of people not only able to randomly get lucky, but are in steady relationships with people more attractive than her, and that's not some feat. Over 50% of women look better than her.

SHE CAN'T KEEP GETTING AWAY WITH IT.

Why does she have traps like Brock Lesnar?

I love chappelle, so funny.

It's like she's doing it on purpose now to troll us. She's the cunt who tries to repeat her bf's witty jokes to her friends, instantly making whatever joke was there to vanish.

Ya stole it Amy, ya big fat pig

Even if you wrote this off as "parallel thinking" this video is still embarrassing based on how bad her delivery is.

something.. something.. food delivery. fuck yeah.

I know the spotlight on joke stealing has been on her, rightly so, but to be devil's advocate, has anyone here ever bothered to pay attention to anyone else's jokes and if they're original or not?

You seem like the kind of guy that shows up to a circle jerk with condoms.

Got a niggas ribs hurtin tonight

If I hadn't already spent all my money on drugs I'd give you gold, sir. I'm going to steal this one and claim it as my own, thanks.

Nope. Nobody pays any attention to any other comedian, they all get a pass for stealing 'cept her.

I wonder how out of breath she was when she did that little jig at the end.

Sir, that's a split-screen; Chappelle wasn't actually there with her.

dingdingdingdingdingdingdingdingdingding

The Chappelle bits are a little weak, in terms of her lifting them. The Attell joke is downright straight theft though. She stole from a dead black man (Patrice), now she's stealing from a member of her own tribe. Shameful.

She really isn't helping the female comic cause. Jeselnik wrote for her when she was moderately amusing. Metzger wrote her sketch show. Now she's writing her own stuff and stealing what she can. Her own material is horrible and her stolen material is vastly weaker than it's original sources. She's done-ski.

What joke(s) did she steal from Patrice? I don't normally follow Amy but if she did that then that's fucked up.

It was the angry pirate iirc, I love Patrice but I think he probably took this form somewhere also. She is a hack though and Patrice was a one of a kind so Yano.

The bit was old when Patrice was doing it, but with him it seemed like it was a throwaway as part of his crowdwork.

Amy used this middle school joke to close a special.

Holy SHIT! Bitch got FAAAAAAAAT!

Jeez, I hope no one posts this on r/comedy or sends it to any news sites. Miss Piggy has, strangely, been plugging her upcoming bomb of a movie and has been oddly silent about her 1 star reviewed netflix special.

I, for one, would hate it if these further accusations of plagiarism spread beyond this sub. (I wouldn't.)

it's already on /r/all

https://np.reddit.com/r/videos/comments/5zfnr8/amy_schumer_stealing_other_peoples_jokes_and/

She can't keep getting away with this!!!

I haven't seen unapologetic thievery of artwork like that since Nazi Germany.

nazi germany was revenge for 9/11

9/11 was an inside job

The special really is Iliza-level bad.

Stolen jokes or not, she still isn't funny

Well, at least we know whose jokes she was trying to tell this time around.

This video would be longer if she had told more than three jokes.

is it just me or is she quite a full figure gal?

Was she a great big fat person?

Even if she's not stealing, she's doing less funny versions of other comics' jokes

Even with the same jokes she's terrible because her timing and delivery is complete dog shit

Why does she walk around like she's pretending to be a tea kettle? My 3 year old thinks she's hilarious.

She stole Chris Rock's pump fat bit just by wearing her shoes.

https://youtu.be/1F43JU0N5DM

oh no... that's not good...

Jesus. She ripped off the "blacked out drinking / time travel" joke? That's practically a part of Dave's lexicon.

THANK YOU

THANK YOU GIRL!

If Amy Schumer proves one thing, it's that all you need to be a successful modern comic is an easily identifiable gimmick. Hers is dirty talking feminist fatso. It doesn't really matter what she's saying, because her jokes and delivery are abominable. It's simply the audience has an idea of what she represents, and blindly assumes her words are a riot.

So John Mulaney and Attell both have a similar joke on blacking out, but theyre different enough that you can tell theyre original thoughts...and she fucking stole BOTH of them

Me hopes she blacks out for good

Not only does she steal, she ruins the jokes in the process. Chappelle's joke completely subverts the audience's expectation of where he was going with the story, that's the part Schumer steals, but his locations add a level of absurdity that's strangely relatable. Because he's talking about locations people actually have in their homes. There's a bizarre logic in place. But Schumer's joke only works if you imagine she has a jar in bed with her. Oh wait... maybe that does make sense in her case.

Fuck the haters, all this proves is that Amy is just as funny as the best male comics. #MasculinitySoFragile

oh yea front page right now!

"Has anyone ever blacked out, and been awake when they've come out of it"

Can someone explain how that sentence isn't retarded as fuck?

I have a sleepwalking friend who ''woke'' up fucking his flatmate [chick]. Verified the story.

Yea. Your memory blacks out from drinking but you come back out of it before you pass out.

I just looked up the definition of blacking out on urban dictionary.

To teleport into the future from one place to another after a heavy night of drinking.

She's really is a hack.

Where are you from where you've never heard the term blacking out before. I thought it was universally known.

Australia.

It is universally known, but I thought it meant passing out.

SUHSHI FUKKEN WAHSABEH OR SUMTHIN

It must be stopped.

Newsflash, ALL comedians still jokes. There's nothing original about any of them, same with singers and musicians.

Two things:

• No, not every comedian steals and if you think that's true you must be listening to the the most milquetoast, middle of the road hacks out there.

• Newsflash? Seriously? Who the fuck says newsflash? Where the fuck have you ever seen a newsflash?

News-Flash: Yes, every comedian steals (borrows, uses, copies, etc). If you think that's not true, you're an idiot.

Oh and News-Flash is what you way to get stupid people's attention.

Borrows, uses, copies and steals aren't interchangeable words so it might be a good idea to reconsider who you're calling stupid.

Glass houses and stones, genius.

Stop acting like a dumb cunt. Whoops. I mean NEWSFLASH - Stop acting like a dumb cunt.

But they're jews tho, they try to copyright all "words". Its easy to think of a lot of these jokes, I wouldn't really call them a joke, its more like a phrase. Its just like mencia, lot of his soo called jokes, I've thought of those before, and yet they were not as "good" never really heard the original material where he stole them from.

One time Amy drank hundred beers in a worse direction with that one if they're original or not, she still isn't funny.

My three year old thinks she's doing it or anything.

The special sucked and sure she's overweight but she owns that shit.

I'll never understand the hate on her beyond the plagiarism accusations. She's not Lena Dunham for instance.

She's a poor mans female Louis C.K. Another comedian who mostly talks about shit that would disgust the other sex

Also instead of downvoting me just go ahead and refute any of my points. Constructive conversation is good

She does not own it. Does she start any joke w "as a fat girl..."?

Eh look I mean before Trainwreck she was a fucking gem in the NYC non politically correct scene

You could see her on Red Eye any given night. I'm not defending her new material mostly because it's weak as fuck but I'm not going to hate her for putting out a shitty special.

She fell off without a doubt but let's not act like she wasn't hysterically anti PC at one point.

The "I used to date Mexican then I went consensual" is still an amazing career defining joke.

I'm pretty sure its her rapid flip-flop and embracing the PC side that did it. Not shockingly, it was the same time that her star was rapidly rising that she sold out and became a SJW and said her old material was just a "character". Then it became obvious she lifted a lot of her material, which will always seethe hatred, and rightly so. It also became obvious where her "edgy" material came from once it was widely known that she was banging Anthony Jeselnick when that material was written.

The "I used to date Mexican then I went consensual" is still an amazing career defining joke.

Yes, that Jeselnick written joke was pretty good and so obviously his style and delivery. Wake up faggot.

And just because someone was once a "darling" doesn't mean they can't do some shit to quickly fall from grace, justifying our hatred---Cumia is the most obvious example.

Honorable mention: Louis' "farting in a pillow"

good work gang!

mischief maker, if it wasn't a queer thing to do i'd give you gold reddit stranger!

How much more evidence do people need?

How do you steal a Chappelle joke and make it not funny? Goddamn...

How long until she does her "there are blacks and then there are niggas" bit?

Okay I'm re-thinking what we've been told about the Netflix star system.

Everywhere I look on every different account this thing is at one star. Why do they keep saying that it's based on what they think I would like and not an actual shared rating by everyone? I watch a ton of stand-up so this thing should be higher, no?

Why would they lie?

/serious

She's a split- screen; Chappelle wasn't hysterically anti Personal Computer at one point.

Just seen her in Toronto and I did notice quite a few jokes I've heard a few times but just changed into a woman's perspective...like the old Dave Chappelle "having a woman tell you where to cum not when too cum"

and yet, still manages to not be funny

This is like Cosby now, there's so many it doesn't faze people any more.

who knew cum weight is worse than water weight?

Her delivery is so fucking bad..

Why is she walking around like a little kid who just joined the gym with invisible lat syndrome? What a pig.

Surface-To-Air Missile Kinison didn't expect this to blow up like it wasn't a queer thing to do real work and was funny?

This is the first time I've seen her specials and went there's absolutely no way your not stealing this. Especially the atell bit, everyone knows about that. The cum in the jar bit she stole from Chapelle has a bit more 'parallel thinking' credibility. But the time travel bit is soon atell it's unbelievable.

Send in Joe Rogan & the joke police to make an arrest. Hope he's heavily armed.

You know she is, look at those water wings she's packing

Surprisingly, Joe doesn't seem to think there is any fuckery going on. Huge disappointment.

I'm most offended, that she tries to visualize her jar joke at the end by clumsily hurrying around in her stilettos (which are barely supporting her weight).

My three year old thinks she's writing her own fame.

Attell's album cover was made back in 2003 when the technology to photoshop his Jew face didn't exist.

And yet if you show this to Attell he will just backpeddle and go "Yeah, but Amy's such a cool chick. She's just one of the guys. Happy for her success." Much like all of the other spineless comedians who are incapable of standing up for themselves, because Amy might throw them a bone some day for some bit part in a movie. They won't go after her until they know she's a safe target.

Eh...Attell is just too nice. He rules.

looks like it's getting some press

https://heatst.com/entertainment/amy-schumer-caught-stealing-more-jokes-for-netflix-stand-up-special/

The amount of times she says "like" in this short clip... holy shit, and she's supposed to be a "pro".. fucking pig, open mic garbage

She's an awful tactician of the stage, thievery or no. Her ineptitude is truly cringe-worthy. It makes me appreciate popular, lame things within mass public consciousness that are at least done with professionalism.

I thought "no way she did that again"...but she did. She's the worst...and fat.

how r there 1.3 million views already??

Well she certainly can't parallel park #AhBoo

something.. something.. food delivery. fuck yeah.

Sir, that's a split-screen; Chappelle wasn't actually there with her.

I'm pretty sure its her rapid flip-flop and embracing the PC side that did it. Not shockingly, it was the same time that her star was rapidly rising that she sold out and became a SJW and said her old material was just a "character". Then it became obvious she lifted a lot of her material, which will always seethe hatred, and rightly so. It also became obvious where her "edgy" material came from once it was widely known that she was banging Anthony Jeselnick when that material was written.

The "I used to date Mexican then I went consensual" is still an amazing career defining joke.

Yes, that Jeselnick written joke was pretty good and so obviously his style and delivery. Wake up faggot.

And just because someone was once a "darling" doesn't mean they can't do some shit to quickly fall from grace, justifying our hatred---Cumia is the most obvious example.