The worst of all is his suckass celebrity photo hobby. He's like a fucking shrieking fan girl.

Do you think he ever stops and stares at them for uncomfortably long stretches of time and just thinks "I matter. I really do matter"?

I picture him at home, alone, hairless and sprawled out on the couch after a eight-hour edge session, wallowing in frothed-up guilt as the morning sun peeks through his blinds after another sleepless, shameful night. After a pang of intense shame, the self-loathing is smothering. He gazes up at the wall in front of him and catches his own smiling image next to Demi Lovato in a framed photograph. The shame is gone and the worm is whole again.

This is beautiful and Stephen King-like.

Goddamn, what a scene.

You should write a whole fanfiction novel that details the lives of O,A,and J.

Beautiful

This post was like poetry.

He doesn't hang up the photos and the walls of his apartment are all totally bare.

Fucking hateable

Amongst a long list of things, it's the most unmasculine thing about him.

Don't forget his failure on the Vice network.

Don't forget his failure on the Vice network.

Pardon my echo tonight. I have a admirer.

nor his taste for those girls with something extra

Failed on IFC too, no?

• stole $60k from his fans

Member when he didn't know what "in the octagon" meant? I remember.

Starves himself to the point where he's nothing but skin and bones and looks horrible, yet he honestly thinks he looks good and is on the right track.

Going to the..

fuck it

All that effort and he has no tone or definition. There are no muscles. He really is a worm.

Yeah, I'm watching old Tough Crowd again lately, and while it did fluctuate, at least at his slimmest during that time he didn't look like half a corpse. Then again, imagine how awful he'd look as chubby cheeks Norton with that extra decade under his belt. Like Benjamin Buttons' less handsome brother.

I would absolutely love to see his workout routine. I guarantee it's horrible and he mainly just run walks on a treadmill or elliptical.

He's a cowboys fan and literally can't name one player on the team and forgets when they are playing on Monday night football. Wears a fanny pack and a 'kid dynamite' sweatshirt on planes, has LITERALLY sucked a guys cock before, used to wear kangol hats, brags that he 'has never mentioned a certain group (Alcoholics Anonymous) yet speaks about it constantly without naming it, voluntarily did radio along human tongue Sherrod Small for two years, constantly claims he could maybe date 24 year old models like Georgia May Jagger who wouldnt fucking look twice at his 53 year old 5' 6" worm ass, then he fake modestly says 'they wouldnt be interested' no shit Jim! Please find a 40 year old 7 that will settle foe you and try to have a moderately normal life.

has LITERALLY sucked a guys cock before

there's a good chance he's had his mouth around a cock more recently than a woman has had hers around his

That's pretty apparent I don't think he can relate to women, he hates them.

who the fuck doesnt

Depends on if you're going by his definition of woman.

Jim picked the cowboys like a child would pick a favourite team.

Anyone from New fucking Jersey whose favorite team is the Dallas Cowboys is an asshole.

I really don't think Jim thinks he could date Georgia Jagger dummy

He wasn't there for us when Anthony yelled at us and told us we have no effect on anyone's lives.

We needed Jimmy that day.

The Jim Norton advice show. Quite possibly the worst thing ever transmitted over satellites.

You do know Opie has a show, yes?

Yes, I've never heard anything as bad as Jim's advice show.

Hmmm... I don't believe you.

That's what makes America great. You can go suck a bunch of different size dicks down at the Walmart parking lot then you can come here and give your opinion and nobody holds the dicks you just sucked against you.

I'll match your Jim advice show and raise you both Mancow and later years Steve Dahl.

I hate Mancow but it was definitely better than Jim's show, I've never heard Steve Dahl but short of the sound of cats being smashed with a hammer it is definitely better than Jim's advice show.

Here is the absolute worst renown radio show: Brother Wease. Jim is 10x more listenable than that old gook raping queer.

That's what makes America great. You can go suck a bunch of different size dicks down at the Walmart

No reason to read anymore, I'm with ya brother!

You know, technically ISIS atrocity videos are transmitted over satellites. But no, you're right, definitely that faggot's self indulgent advice show.

Why should we not forget? The more he succeeds the worse Opie feels. You fucking faggot

When will he start "succeeding?"

Do you see opie on his usual timeslot? Do you see opie's name on his usual channel name?

No?

Sure??

Dummy.

So that's succeeding? His show stinks, he only has it because he rode Opies coattails for 15 years. Opie made ten times the amount of money than Jimmy did and he didn't have to pretend to love trannies once.

The time he got upset and unfollowed all of his comedian friends on twitter.

I'm not sure what's worse, that or defending Amy Schumer.

"defending Amy"

This. Ain't no coming back from this

Ol' Coattails is gonna get a cameo to stick some day.

It's weird! It's-it's sick!

"Its not sick."

"I dont think thats a very good argument"

The time he got upset and unfollowed all of his comedian friends on twitter.

The worst part of that is how he tried to squirm out of it and paint himself the victim when CQ confronted him on the air.

HA! i forgot about that. I don't think I've ever used the word "petulant" before but, uh.... Jim's definitely a fag

jimmy needs to smoke weed on rogan. would be the greatest career/life move he could make.

It would be hilarious. He'd get really fucking paranoid and start crying.

When he always used to complain about his coffee and bananas and a mealy apple. Jim Norton coffee diva!

Thinks he's ultra informed on everything and can psycho-analyse everyone's behaviour

Those big pontificating inhalations he does through his nose when he is about to make a long winded point are infuriating

Stold 45k from fans from a gofundme to publish "Boats .... Down There" and never did

Anyone who says "basic holds" should be whipped

I can't argue the other stuff, but the shit about his addiction is stupid.

He thinks that if he drinks another beer it'll do a certain thing to him. It's probably not true, but we all make fun of Ant for being an alcoholic. We can't make fun of a guy for trying his hardest to not be an alcoholic.

Ronnie B is the same way. I mean he drank/etc long after he was 18 but when he talked about how he couldn't get pain meds when he had his appendix surgery because he "was already looking forward to the high" that stuck with me.

I'm a huge fag.

I'm a huge fag.

That was the only part of your comment worth any merit.

He's not trying to keep from falling off that slippery slope of drinking another Zima after a 40 year break, he's trying to glorify himself as this hard knocks comic who fights these imaginary demons because he wants to be like every other troubled comic in history.

spent 40 mins trying to figure out : mountains and snowboarding

Imagine if you knew a guy like this in real life. A guy who watches MMA casually, so he doesn't know the holds. Or a guy who talks about mundane things because his life isn't eventful. Or a guy who stopped being a fan of something because he met a guy associated with it and had a negative experience. Or a guy who asked for money for a creative project and didn't deliver it on time.

I have never, EVER in my fucking life met anyone even REMOTELY close to this kind of person, and if I do I will fucking KILL THEM. JUST THE THOUGHT OF IT BOILS MY FUCKING BLOOD. FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT. YOU WANNA WATCH MMA BUT THEN NOT KNOW THE HOLDS? YOU WANT TO? YOU PIECE OF SHIT? YOU WANNA COME AT ME? OH, YOU'RE A FUCKING BIG MAN NOW? GETTING ALL BRAVE? COME TO MY FUCKING HOUSE I'LL SHOW YOU AROUND.

Big boy's got the big bat tah-day! How's that feel, fucker!

Dude, are you trying to quit smoking or something?

When he stonewalled Nick Mullen for being funny by questioning every joke like because he couldn't match wit.

He is notorious for blocking comics from coming on the old show out of insecurity.

I can excuse him for most of his flaws. But the one I can't is his fucking around on his phone during the show. There really is no excuse for it anymore

The pathetic attempts he makes to take his ego out of issues and come at it objectively

"and dude.....its not like "ohh what about my self interests?? i could give a fuck about my self interests", Im just explaining how you clearly invited my friends and not me"

It would be really faggy if Jim started learning UFC holds because he's a fan though.

-Is gay

The Derek Jeter thing is reprehensible

Not just stopped following baseball - but hates all athletes (except MMA guys) because Jeter wouldn't give him a picture.

He only likes UFC because he gets good tickets for free and they take pictures with him. I highly doubt he ever watches mma at home for pure entertainment purposes. That's not a bad thing, mma is white trash dogshit, but hosting a show for the sole reason of getting easy pictures of athletes who are less famous than you are is.

I LOVE this thread. Good work all.

He hates Conor Mcgregor b/c of this: https://www.reddit.com/r/opieandanthony/comments/4t18yn/jimmy_meets_conor_mctapper_backstage_conor_doesnt/?st=iypedke3&sh=d6ca9a4d

And the way he creeped there was... 100% Cringe

When he kicked Norm MacDonald and Colin Quinn out of the studio so there was an open chair for some UFC fighter, and he asked him such hard-hitting questions as "Did you ever get into fights growing up?"

-He has been watching UFC for 10 years and still doesnt even know the most basic holds.So he really isnt a fan

Welp you're a Giant Faggot. I've been watching for longer than that and know the holds but I'd never care if anyone didn't.

Only faggots do that.

Like you.

Faggot.

• Requires a bodyguard to chaperone him at all times despite no one recognizing him in public.

Yeah fuck those snobby L. A. comics like Zach who think I don't need a full time bodyguard to intimidate Club owners into not jewing me out of the proceeds for 2 seats.

-Every time a guest comes in he has to make a tranny/cuckold joke. -Use 1 terrorist name in every terror story to sound informed. -Had an advice show where he didn't give anyone advice.

Use 1 terrorist name in every terror story to sound informed.

Fuck I hate that. How many more times is he gonna reference Mohamed Atta?

Didn't he awkwardly bring up foot fetishes to one guest (possibly Tarantino), and it got nothin'.

-He forgot that he DAHNCED

-stopped following baseball because derek jeter wouldnt take a photo with him

This belongs on his tombstone

That time he had the Malcom McDowell (?) from Clockwork Orange sign a lot of Clockwork Orange shit -including the Clockwork Orange Play that McDowell was not in (he signed it reluctantly- he didn't want to sign it).

And then once it was signed, he couldn't give less of a fuck about Malcolm

Hosted the afternoon lineup on Nickelodeon under the alias "Stick Stickly."

"I dislike Jim a lot. His fence sitting, seeing things both ways, his shitty diet obsession, having a sip of alcohol as a kid and calling himself an alcoholic, droning on and on about trannies and ufc, using characters as a crutch, sticking with sirius and letting Ant die in the wilderness, sacking up to celebrities for pictures and throwing tantrums when they don't want a picture taken with a worm, throwing more tantrums about not getting breakfast delivered by interns, bitching like a privileged asshole about air travel, not being man enough to admit he's a fruit, enjoying his biggest contract yet playing with his phone and making the worst radio with Sam in his entire career, passive aggressive jabs at former radio partners like a teenage girl, afraid to confront people, stealing from the fans."

user/porsalin

1) His entire schtick is 100% lifted from Otto's "George" character.

2) He wears panties and is horrible at doing radio.

3) He bought furniture so guys can fuck him on it.

Into it. They're going to fuck him into his bean bag furniture

That time he came on this sub and gave everyone about 35 seconds to call into his show to talk about Amy. But the hundreds of members here all pussied out because they were too afraid to confront a 5'2 120lb man over the phone.

-Interacts with women like a horny teenager

-Has jerked off to internet porn so much he has no sense of what a real sexual relationship is like

-pretends to be more conservative than he really is because he's afraid of pissing off his audience

-is a cuck who idolizes black comedians like Pryor

-brought a fucking salad and power bars to a tinder date

-brought a fucking salad and power bars to a tinder date

Unforgivable.

I hate his stupid fucking breakfasts. He eats like a 9 year old girl with cancer and I hope he dies of malnutrition. It's probably why he looks so weird and shitty.

Rush Norm MacDonald out of the studio in favour of the nuanced and humourous thoughts of Brock Lesnar.

Shit stand up.

I'm so glad this breakfast hate is catching on. Fuck eating breakfast at work.

The only breakfast I'd like to hear about him eating on air is if they brought in a couple of sausage and egg mcmuffins and made him eat them. His retarded "all or nothing" weak willpower would kick in and a couple of months later we'd have fat, angry, funny Jimmy back.

Complained that he accidentally put his real age on his tinder profile and couldn't change it and thats why he wasnt getting any dates, because tinder removed his ability to lie to young women about being the age they want to date.

Also, was and probably still is a compulsive viagra abuser.

There are plenty of reasons to hate anybody. It's really easy to do. I suggest finding a more difficult hobby... Like finding any merit in Opie's career.

Cried over Roger Ebert.

Cried when Colin Quinn tore up his tender sentiments bit and threw them out of the window.

• The "topical" humor in his standup. Is he still referencing Sandusky and Donald Sterling?
• Loving Gene Simmons because he's a childhood idol. Hating him because he snubbed him for a picture at the airport or wherever. Loving him again.
  

The Black Puffer Jacket

Let's not forget when he was sleeping over his friends house, after 4 Zima's, he would take catshit from the litter box and put it in his friends fathers newspaper. Then he would piss all over their faucets and shower in the bathroom.

He wouldn't let Doug Benson on O&J because Doug didn't ask him to come on his podcast. What a petty little prick.

How about the time his partner of 10+ years got fired over the fourth of July, but the Sell-out Keeed decided to stay with the less talented partner for the paycheck.

He then proceeded to completely ruin the other partners career to get his own show with the former intern.

Jeezus I can't believe I just defended Opie... peckahs

To make the Jeter thing worse, he admitted Jeter had some pretty girls trying to get his attention while Jimmy went up to him. And we all know Jim wouldn't ignore some fat neckbeard fan for a pretty girl.

I think Jim wants to sit in the "Board OP" seat is because when guests come in they will always look to that seat as the Boss / Leader of the show... Check the Vincent Philip D'Onofrio interview... Vincent focuses on Sam and just glances at Jim. JIM WANTS THAT FOCUS

Do you see opie on his usual timeslot? Do you see opie's name on his usual channel name?

No?

Sure??

Dummy.

Not just stopped following baseball - but hates all athletes (except MMA guys) because Jeter wouldn't give him a picture.