BREAKING: Sam just made me laugh

25  2017-01-17 by TheScarletR

Talking about Lobster boiling -

Jim: I just dont like it cause its mean

Sam: You know what a lobster would do if he had the chance? pinch, pinch, pinch

Jim: So what?

Sam: Jim, we respond to their bullet with a cannon ball

The idea that we boil lobsters because they could potentially pinch us, otherwise, really gave me a good larff

Im gay

35 comments

This would be something joe rogan would say but 100% serious

"Isn't it weird how we keep these animals alive at the restaurant and then eat them? Or maybe it's not even that crazy - maybe that's the way it's supposed to be, you know. Human beings are supposed to be connected with the animals they kill."

"what if lobsters, were really... crabs, ever think of that brian"?

"These lobsters man, theyre fucking crazy. Did you know they used to pinch us all the time but we started boiling them now they don't fuck with us as much?"

That was infuriatingly close to his speech pattern. Start off with half a thought and argue yourself into a non-point.

You left out a hemp reference.

"Dude the lobsters could come back and fuck us up man, their claws are strong you little bitch. Give them some DMT and throw them in an isolation tank, you'll see. Did you see that video of the guy shitting on that UFO in France? Jaime pull that up."

"While Young Jaime pulls that up, let me tell you guys about this new 70lb compound bow I just started using"

Listening to that retard talk like he is some hunting/outdoors expert after picking up hunting 2 years ago is so annoying.

"Lobsters are bad muthafuckers"

LOL...that is dead on

("duuuuuude ALIENS EXIST!.....i've met them doing 'SHROOOOMS")

The reference to Opie while saying Lobsters aren't self aware was lol too.

Did James really say that boiling lobsters is "mean"?

He is a girly little faggot, isn't he?

Yes, yes he is

Well, it's not exactly friendly, is it?

Of course not, the problem is that of all the applicable words, a (supposedly) grown man defaulted to "mean". If he'd said, "cruel", "harsh", "violent", "savage", that would have been fine. It's just off-putting to hear adult men say something is "mean" without sarcasm.

the lobster is a problem, a savage!!

No it's not, I'm as big a cunt as the next guy, but I don't like the idea of boiling another living thing to death

try putting them in the microwave

Il put you in the microwave in a minute

u need a big ass microwave

didnt he treat his opener to steak & lobster dinner ?

Hoping that someone will tweet him about how gay that sounds, then he can retweet and blast the person and Ricky Gervais will see it and how much jim loves animals.

but u also a ball washer

Nigga shut up

Fake news

Jesus, Jimmy, your conversion to full woman seems to be almost complete.

He's been a weird animal rights guy for a long time.

I'm the crustation keeeeeeid

If Sam had balls he would have turned the lobster boiling into a Anthony's ex Melinda blowing a intern to save a lobster.

I think this was going to be the suicide news.

Sam is a good "host" Like Opie was once long ago. He doesn't try to hard to be funny because that's not his job. He has moments where he can be and takes them occasionally.

Listening to that retard talk like he is some hunting/outdoors expert after picking up hunting 2 years ago is so annoying.