holy fuck luis i know youre reading this im a professional poker player if you do serious damage to that sub I'll give you 5000 USD in bitcoin. If nathan ever kills himself it'll be an extra 10000. I'm man of my word mister public relations rattlesnake.
Can someone unban me from /r/news? Apparently no matter how intelligent and well thought out your point is you can still get banned for calling someone a camel jockey.
TBH, I don't even remember exactly. I was trying to make a sarcastic joke, but they banned me instantly. I get they have zero tolerance but I'd think a warning would be more reasonable. No biggie.
Yeah they ban stupid faggots super fast, which is one of the reasons I like it. Also, I like that racist frog that is always being funny... paype or pehpeh, something like that.
Quick refresher of things anonymous commenters aren't allowed to shit on anymore:
Appearance: Age, sex, height, weight, race, gender. The picture is there to keep the comic from making jokes he would be ashamed to do in real life, and to make it slightly harder for twitter "celebrities" like fatjew to build followings based off stolen material. It is not an invitation to /r/roastme.
Career status: The fact you didn't like this joke means fuck-all about the submitter's level of talent. Comedians with major TV credits don't get any special treatment in this sub - comedians without them don't deserve special abuse.
Things you can shit on: Literally anything else. You can rant about white genocide, Amy Schumer, or whatever your heart desires. You can even call other commenters cucks and SJWs. You just can't call Tim one.
That is 99% of the roast battles Luis hosts, and they're all the better for it. /u/NathanTheSnake Go watch Roastmasters on the Stand NYC youtube channel and you'll see that comics don't give a shit about your fucking rules, and that's why they're funny and you're not.
If you liked that, you'll love this gem from facebook:
Old man alert: A portion of online trolls feel enabled by Comedy Roast Culture. They see comics busting balls - and don't realize they're watching the verbal equivalent of professional wrestling. There's a difference between two acquaintances insulting each other for the benefit of an audience - and 100 strangers telling you to kill yourself. These people honestly do believe they're helping us become better comedians - because they think the defining aspect of a good comedian is absorbing and retaliating to insults.
It's not the fault of the comics - but the dumbass kids. It's just weird we put "Professionals. Don't Try This At Home" in front of Jackass to prevent physical injuries - but don't give a shit about emotional ones.
Ah, you're a professional and we're just civilians. We haven't gone to the school of hard knocks like you guys with your fancy PhDs in comedy.
As someone who is not a Trump supporter (as you seem to think we all are) and is in fact a filthy disgusting liberal like yourself, your rules are embarrassing and self-important.
Go fucking cry about it then. You're not Socrates because you went on stage at an Open Mic night shithead. Guys have been making fun of each other forever, yet you put it in text on a black background and suddenly you're too important and above it all to get any shit back despite putting yourself out there on a public forum. You're not a professional or a "sad clown". You're just sad.
It's just weird we put "Professionals. Don't Try This At Home" in front of Jackass to prevent physical injuries - but don't give a shit about emotional ones.
Ah, you're playing a character. You got me. Good one.
A portion of online trolls feel enabled by Comedy Roast Culture. They see comics busting balls - and don't realize they're watching the verbal equivalent of professional wrestling.
We understand completely. This isn't jovial ball busting between pals, we just don't like you and our favorite radio show is off the air so we have like 4 hours to burn. And you stupidly paid attention to us.
The “sad clown” stereotype exists for a reason; Robin Williams, Richard Jeni, Greg Giraldo, Mitch Hedberg - all extremely funny men with extremely serious demons. These mental health issues don’t suddenly appear once people have “heard of you.” They started in childhood, sometimes before we can remember.
Aside from being the most nauseatingly self pitying thing I've ever read, I like how you had the fucking arrogance to lump yourself in with some of the most legendary comedians of all time. "We", haha.
You're not 'somebody' & you're not an artist. You're some gated community raised snowflake who owns a computer & posts cringey crybaby manifestos masquerading as humor to a bunch of other self defeated faggots.
I'd tell you to kill yourself but you'd just take 4 Advils & spend 8 hours writing some cry for help with a picture of yourself & your twitter handle next to it.
69 comments
43 [deleted] 2016-12-11
"purge all of the unfunny jokes" - does he mean that he's quitting right away?
35 TheScarletR 2016-12-11
This is no time to poke fun at our one hope
7 [deleted] 2016-12-11
www.lostallhope.com
5 whydontUlovemeLyndsi 2016-12-11
The image they use at the top of that page was my recreation last night, bunch of weak pussies.
41 Thomas_Daly 2016-12-11
holy fuck luis i know youre reading this im a professional poker player if you do serious damage to that sub I'll give you 5000 USD in bitcoin. If nathan ever kills himself it'll be an extra 10000. I'm man of my word mister public relations rattlesnake.
6 buurp 2016-12-11
ill suck yo dick for 1% of that
21 TheScarletR 2016-12-11
/u/ThePRRattlesnake will do right by us and unban everyone from this sub
25 iWhereSchortSchorts 2016-12-11
Can someone unban me from /r/news? Apparently no matter how intelligent and well thought out your point is you can still get banned for calling someone a camel jockey.
12 MalcolmX_InTheMiddle 2016-12-11
/r/news /r/videos /r/politics are incredibly easy to get banned from these days.
13 Aemon12 2016-12-11
/r/The_Donald is the worst - it bans instantly and without warning.
9 MalcolmX_InTheMiddle 2016-12-11
They have 53 mods. It's a diceroll with every post. Plus they don't take kindly to light racial ribbing anymore. A real bummer.
4 Ant_Sucks 2016-12-11
I post there all the time. How are you banned?
14 yeahheymate 2016-12-11
trying to address a deep seeded problem with violence in the black community
1 Aemon12 2016-12-11
TBH, I don't even remember exactly. I was trying to make a sarcastic joke, but they banned me instantly. I get they have zero tolerance but I'd think a warning would be more reasonable. No biggie.
-1 racemic_mixture 2016-12-11
Yeah they ban stupid faggots super fast, which is one of the reasons I like it. Also, I like that racist frog that is always being funny... paype or pehpeh, something like that.
24 andiswearrrr 2016-12-11
Unban me /u/ThePRRattlesnake
I have lots more funny jokes about the negroes that need to be shared
10 cnuttin 2016-12-11
those cunts banned me and I was putting up legit content.
4 Ant_Sucks 2016-12-11
/u/ThePRRattlesnake Unban Chip! (He was using my account).
1 [deleted] 2016-12-11
[deleted]
17 andiswearrrr 2016-12-11
/u/NathanTheSnake Fuck you.
8 CowsAreCurious 2016-12-11
He literally just posted this too.
11 Ant_Sucks 2016-12-11
That is 99% of the roast battles Luis hosts, and they're all the better for it. /u/NathanTheSnake Go watch Roastmasters on the Stand NYC youtube channel and you'll see that comics don't give a shit about your fucking rules, and that's why they're funny and you're not.
0 [deleted] 2016-12-11
[removed]
12 alkalineforyou 2016-12-11
Stop trying to be magnanimous and a good guy. It's obvious this is all affecting you, pussy. Go tell another literary joke.
5 Ant_Sucks 2016-12-11
Fair enough, that's a surprisingly reasonable response. But you banned Chip, so you're a PEESA GAWBAGE!
9 herpacin 2016-12-11
All niggers are not black.
-46 NathanTheSnake 2016-12-11
If you liked that, you'll love this gem from facebook:
Old man alert: A portion of online trolls feel enabled by Comedy Roast Culture. They see comics busting balls - and don't realize they're watching the verbal equivalent of professional wrestling. There's a difference between two acquaintances insulting each other for the benefit of an audience - and 100 strangers telling you to kill yourself. These people honestly do believe they're helping us become better comedians - because they think the defining aspect of a good comedian is absorbing and retaliating to insults. It's not the fault of the comics - but the dumbass kids. It's just weird we put "Professionals. Don't Try This At Home" in front of Jackass to prevent physical injuries - but don't give a shit about emotional ones.
49 SHITLORD_CUNTDICK 2016-12-11
Ah, you're a professional and we're just civilians. We haven't gone to the school of hard knocks like you guys with your fancy PhDs in comedy.
As someone who is not a Trump supporter (as you seem to think we all are) and is in fact a filthy disgusting liberal like yourself, your rules are embarrassing and self-important.
45 CowsAreCurious 2016-12-11
Shut up faggot.
31 Mikekekeke 2016-12-11
Go fucking cry about it then. You're not Socrates because you went on stage at an Open Mic night shithead. Guys have been making fun of each other forever, yet you put it in text on a black background and suddenly you're too important and above it all to get any shit back despite putting yourself out there on a public forum. You're not a professional or a "sad clown". You're just sad.
29 herpacin 2016-12-11
Emotional injuries? That's the gayest thing I have ever heard.
16 lemskroob 2016-12-11
the softest generation the earth has ever seen. Humanity is in trouble.
24 TheScarletR 2016-12-11
Youre so insightful its a wonder you arent further along in the biz
24 TriangleDimes 2016-12-11
kill yourself
24 Piss_God_Denny 2016-12-11
This sub finding out how much of an unfunny cocksucker you are must be the most buzz you've ever gotten.
23 lemskroob 2016-12-11
hang yourself in the nearest attic.
22 RacksDiciprine 2016-12-11
As far as Hack Comedians go you are the worst. Go back to your safe space and stop Brigading us
4 Yujiro_Hanma_ 2016-12-11
Cmon reddit can't we ge get this guy banned? He's trolling us and invading our safe space!
19 VeritablyClean 2016-12-11
Naht funneh
18 NihilistKnight 2016-12-11
I hope a large gentleman of color violently removes your hat.
17 Ant_Sucks 2016-12-11
Ah, you're playing a character. You got me. Good one.
15 Muted_Post-Horn 2016-12-11
I think I speak for everyone when I say we'd all be better off without you, faggot. Invest in a rifle with a toe attachment.
14 AiCPearlJam 2016-12-11
I hope you go into cardiac arrest on the limo ride to your daughter's wedding.
8 xyniphis 2016-12-11
His wife's daughter's wedding.
13 bambonk 2016-12-11
So broken arms and legs, concussions and broken necks are the same as hurt feelings. Gotcha. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rsfXIkCNyO4
10 shmigshmog 2016-12-11
We understand completely. This isn't jovial ball busting between pals, we just don't like you and our favorite radio show is off the air so we have like 4 hours to burn. And you stupidly paid attention to us.
8 TotesMessenger 2016-12-11
I'm a bot, bleep, bloop. Someone has linked to this thread from another place on reddit:
If you follow any of the above links, please respect the rules of reddit and don't vote in the other threads. (Info / Contact)
8 Yujiro_Hanma_ 2016-12-11
This is why alt comedy gets and deserves no respect.
6 dassabessdoe 2016-12-11
You are a faggot.
6 two_phone_shawty 2016-12-11
Ew "emotional ones"
I hope you get caught in a gas station robbery and shot.
6 Jarvismcjigglesteins 2016-12-11
Aside from being the most nauseatingly self pitying thing I've ever read, I like how you had the fucking arrogance to lump yourself in with some of the most legendary comedians of all time. "We", haha.
You're not 'somebody' & you're not an artist. You're some gated community raised snowflake who owns a computer & posts cringey crybaby manifestos masquerading as humor to a bunch of other self defeated faggots.
I'd tell you to kill yourself but you'd just take 4 Advils & spend 8 hours writing some cry for help with a picture of yourself & your twitter handle next to it.
God.
3 Muted_Post-Horn 2016-12-11
Lmao bodied dat nigga
5 skankhunt420lol 2016-12-11
kill yourself
4 KennethFresno 2016-12-11
Ewww. Hack.
1 [deleted] 2016-12-11
[deleted]
1 OAUK 2016-12-11
Ant?
1 [deleted] 2016-12-11
[deleted]
16 RacksDiciprine 2016-12-11
If Luis Purges all the unfunny jokes that sub is dead to rights
14 AiCPearlJam 2016-12-11
They're hoping a mildly known comedian will recognize one of them and say "I need to bring this guy on the road with me"
8 iWhereSchortSchorts 2016-12-11
Lol, all the comics are gonna go I can't bring them on the road because I'm doing Trump stuff too.
9 HerpDerpen 2016-12-11
We got 3/5 of a man on the inside.
7 goo-gobbler 2016-12-11
Yeah unban me, I got a bunch of homeruns ready to go
7 PantyTheMagicNiceguy 2016-12-11
Yeah un ban me I had so many good jokes that people where laughin an fallin out their chairs in shit tss
6 YouAintGotToLieCraig 2016-12-11
Battle of the Snakes.
6 NumeroOtto 2016-12-11
Luis go kamikaze. suicide mission. kill yourself
4 Hunter_Cumia 2016-12-11
i made it happen
https://www.reddit.com/r/opieandanthony/comments/5hkotw/quick_thanks_to_jim_norton_and_luis_j_gomez/db0yp1w/
i didnt even know we are feuding with that subs mod lol
1 [deleted] 2016-12-11
[removed]
1 [deleted] 2016-12-11
[removed]
1 Doc_McCoy79 2016-12-11
Gorlami.
1 racemic_mixture 2016-12-11
Luis - please, please, let all these faggots know how unfunny they are. Thank you.
2 cabaretcabaret 2016-12-11
Jay and Dave are his friends
0 MedicatedHead 2016-12-11
Luis J Gomez is the 40 year old creeper that hangs out with high school kids and constantly offers to buy beer.
11 i_do_i_do_let_u_bang 2016-12-11
What exactly is the problem?