Beer makes me fat, red wine makes me diarrhoea, vodka makes me pass out.. what do you guys drink?

0  2016-10-14 by [deleted]

[deleted]

37 comments

Water, now that I'm sober this week.

Here's to a new life!!!

ya know what goes really good with water? 12 beers in a row

Yeah. Yeah it does.

But the last time I enjoyed 12 beers I woke up $700 poorer with an apartment that smelled like stripper pussy and weed.

I also lost my wallet at the casino.

Are these the things you want for my life, sir?

Small time, I once got all zooted in bangkok on coke and oxys and woke up with a std and no debit card. And thats how I lost my virginity at 22 years old. I miss that thai hooker so much, my first time included anal and ass to mouth with a girl I met at a club where a chick was shooting bananas out her pussy.

It was awesome, my favorite memory though is after we were done we took a shower and she was rinsing her mouth out with water and I remembered I had mouth wash in my backpack. I was gonna give her it but realized I needed something to wash my dick with as its covered in hooker ass diseases, so I waited for her to leave the bathroom and scrubed my dick with listerine. I went out drinking with her afterwards and then rode bitch on her scooter to a brothel hotel where I made out with her did more coke and fucked her again. Good times

Stripper Pussy and Weed?? Yesss!

She ate all the deviled eggs in my fridge and made herself a frozen dinner. She can't come back.

i understand. that's totally inconsiderate.

Exactly. I may even send a bill to the club. One bill for a home made plate of deviled eggs.

Do you think the bouncers can help me get the invoice cleared up?

cum

As

Diesel

vin diesel's jizz

[deleted]

The only hot drink I like is tea

[deleted]

Tetley, I'm not on my period

Tss yeah what tea does Opie drink Tiltey or sumpthin?

Bill?

Male tears! Am I right, ladies! Can I get a WHOOP WHOOP!

fawkin killer Shoomes! take a bow or sumptin

Bleach-antifreeze cocktail

That would be an awful death, I'd rather throw myself off my 3rd story balcony

Drink some crumpets you EU leaving cunt.

I dint vote cunt

Was cunt an option?

I should think not. A name like that is just asking for puns and trouble.

Lightweight

Same exact thing happens to me but I still drink all of that shit anyway.

[deleted]

soak your tampon in them fag?

Scotch, not so much anymore but a great sipping drink

you sound like a pussy

Water.

Bourbon.

The golden showers of a nubile Vietnamese twink

Beer doesn't have that many calories. Stop eating like shit all the time.

I don't!!!! I drink smoothies and eat chicken with kale .. I drink 12 beers a days and Iv put on 4 stone in 12 months

Edit - I tweet dr Steve

You, my good man, are a faggot and a pussy. You drink Bourbon and beer. unless there is none, in which case you drink whatever is available. I don't want to ever see you out yourself as a flaming homosexual on this sub again.

ME: My own breast milk.

When I'm with my pally Denny we drink piss.

[deleted]

Bill?

I don't!!!! I drink smoothies and eat chicken with kale .. I drink 12 beers a days and Iv put on 4 stone in 12 months

Edit - I tweet dr Steve

Tss yeah what tea does Opie drink Tiltey or sumpthin?