Hey guys, I hit a female deer with my car today (for real)

0  2016-08-08 by Really_Big_Dummy

25 comments

Dassabessdoe

Just hittin' n killin'

Dassa messed doe.

Doe a deer

a female deer...

I hit a woman pushing a baby carriage, with a stolen and unregistered car.

Up your game pussy. :P

Really?

Yeah.

Really.

What happened to the woman? Was the carriage full of cans?

The woman was splattered across the road and my windshield.

I just missed the carriage. I knicked it and it careened into a ditch.

As they handcuffed me I saw them pulling a crying infant out.

I am not an animal.

I really don't know if I should believe this or not but if it's real that must have been awful. Did you serve time?

You shouldn't believe anything you read here.

I smashed the shit out the kid too.

I showed my PBA card and got it ruled an accident.

Anthony comment?

[deleted]

+/u/User_Simulator anthonycumiashow

You get them on and make it fun, interesting for not just the audience, but for the concern but I assure you there's nothing to my own fucking mouth!

~ anthonycumiashow


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This is what every one of these simulator posts sounds like:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DWaiT5fZHBs

I don't understand what you are.

I'll bet you drove right up her fuckin' cootah er sumtin'

[deleted]

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Did she have bodacious gazongas?

Thank god for those AIRBAGS! YOWZAS! (no it was a female deer and she ran off)

Doe a deer a female deer

yes stinkskc, that is what i was going for, now carry on sitting in a piss stained alleyway soliciting blowjobs to high school kids who are really selling you crushed up tylenenol 3s

I just wanted to sing. How'd you know it was piss stained ?

In one of your drug fueled bouts of depravity you started periscoping. Most of the camera view was blocked by a thick black veiny cock, college basketball shorts, and greasy hair, and the only audio sounded like a bathtub emptying, however occasionally the shaky camera would point down and away showing the undeniable splatter pattern of drunk hipster piss stains on the concrete walls of the alley.

You have quite the imagination rbd

imagination...... or observation skills?

Oh deer.

yes stinkskc, that is what i was going for, now carry on sitting in a piss stained alleyway soliciting blowjobs to high school kids who are really selling you crushed up tylenenol 3s