That jimmys needs a armed bodyguard/personal driver/thug aka kenny anytime he leaves his apartment is a fricking bizarre aspect of the show thats never been explored or explained. Ant has Keith, his own 24/7 armed baby sitter. But that I understand, Keith purpose is to keep Ant out of jail for fucking children and to smooth over drunken adventures that cross the local PD. But, Ant will leave his house without Keith glued to his hip. Yimmy on the other hand, seems to need his pet goon, when he goes into public spaces

I explained this before. Remember Jimmy being angry at Jeter not taking a photo with him & only talking to "chicks"? Jimmy was mostly angry cuz he's the same exact guy without the balls to do it himself. Jimmy hates other people & he hates the fans (unless it's a chick that might fuck him). So the investment in Kenny's salary is essentially what it's worth to him to keep the 10s of fans away from him & not bother him so he doesn't have to do it himself. I'm sure a big part of it is that he doesn't want to be a hypocrite & he's already made a big deal about how he hates when Celebs won't take pics with him. But yea, I think hiring a goon to keep the scum-of-the-Earth fans away from precious Jimmy is so much worse than being a guy like Jeter who is man enough to do what he wants & interact with who he wants to without giving a fuck

Nothing steams my broccoli more then hearing Yim bitch about how a celeb won't take a photo with him. Like do you not even fucking realize that you are just an annoying fanboy on the other side of the table to them? Do you really need photographed documentation that you have a "life with the stars"?

One day I'm gonna break into his apartment and burn all his celeb photos in front of him while taking a piss on the Ozzy one while doing bad Chip impressions.

How glorious it would be if his hard drive with all the photos shit the bed

I honestly don't understand the picture thing. Is a visitor meant to see his pictures and go
"oh wow, do you know Paul McCartney?"
"Uh, no. I saw him at work once" "Oh. Is that Sylvester Stallone? Are you guys friends?"
"Um, no. I saw him at work once"

tape his eyes open and make him watch the Chip tv show over and over again...for me.

.... the 10s of fans away from him.....Line of the day! ROFL

Show us yer tits and shut the fuck up.

Oh...ok... http://i.imgur.com/VCJt4oO.jpg

Good girl.

is this real? look's like those blueberries are going straight to his tits

You're a moron.

yeah, well you're a less on

p.s suck my dick you faggot

Could you tell she was a woman from her awful, adds-nothing comment?

That's sexist. All of my comments are worthless and I'm not some slit

Does this mean you think the whole sub are women?

read the username stupid

OF COURSE it was from the username you dumb spic, the joke is that women are so unfunny that you can tell them just by their comment quality.

You know what, sometimes it feels like me n Knickers are holding the fort down by ourselves in here. It's about time you fucking dirty migrants started shaping up and contributing.

thats what i get from commenting after i wake up. let me fix this real quick...peckahs

I hope by 'fix this' you mean by sending me pictures of your madre's filthy peasant snatch

Well she is thick, but please don't compliment knickers I've had enough of the meme-esque ironic gay shit

[deleted]

Kenny is probably the most recognisable thing about Norton. I don't think I'd be able to spot him without a 7 foot goon shadowing his every move, maybe on a summers day check for any kiss shirts but otherwise he'd just be another oddly thin face in the crowd.

theres always story floating around about kenny man handling and shoving the fans around so they cant bother the comedy star

I ran into Jimmy once on the sidewalk and he was nice. I think Kenny is mostly there because:

• Bigger celebrities have an entourage and having Kenny makes Jim feel like more of a big shot

• He does roadie/merch stuff that Jim doesn't want to do

• And most of all, Jim gets into some really sketchy shit with all the prostitutes.

It's hilarious because all the alt comics at Bonnaroo gave him shit for it and he later tried to pass it off like Kenny was his tour manager that handled all the grunt work.

Even that explanation from him is shit. He needs a tour manager for places less than 2,000 seats?

didnt big jay and rogan made fun of him for that too?

Keith purpose is to keep Ant out of jail for fucking children...

Don't forget that Keith's wife dresses Ant

I'll bet Kenny can only carry a gun in New York. No other state will reciprocate with New York because they are douche bags.

"Nobody knows who i am but i need a bodyguard anyway"

" Jim Morton does not wipe his own bottom "

"Nobody knows who i am but i crave the company of mouth-breathing men"

You would pay for protection too if you were 4'8".

..............1/2

(see also: Cumia, relationship with KTC)

Way too far bro

Who else is going to get his glasses back from the local lady boy prostitutes for him ?

Beyond how lame it is for Baby Boy to need a traveling secretary/bodyguard are the financial implications. Salary, travel costs, meals, etc. The Worm needs his Sirius salary to continue this weirdness.

It really is crazy. I assume he spends at least 100k/yr on this top notch and totally necessary security service

To protect him from the angry hookers he pays 100k/yr for blowjobs

"To punch people trying to say hi to Jim" -Louie

Jesus, and it's probably true

Why would you even want to hang out with that absolute zero - Kenny. I'd rather get kidnapped.

[removed]

Jim Norton, the humorless invertebrate points his slow body guard to the nearest truck stop

He really DOES take the shape of whatever container you pour him in.

Remember how everyone else at SXM thought it was weird Opie, Anthony, and Jim needed Kenny around and how he would protect them while going to the bathroom. Meanwhile no one's going to bother them and you need credentials to be on the floor anyway. It's just do bizarre. Who do they think is going to bother them? Even at the height of the Stern fued there was no risk.

I would imagine the reason for baby boy having Kenny as his 24 hour babysitter is a mixture of being a defenseless 5'5" little nothing who most girls could probably physically best, and also wanting a buffer between him and his fans who he doesn't want to interact with in anyway.

I read "wanting a buffer" as "water buffler" lol

"I just wanted to say congratulations to lady myaaaaah..."

Dice had Kenny. So Jim thinks that he can never be big time without a goon squad. Same with rappers/celebrities that must have an entourage.

Most rappers actually do need a few people around in case something goes down though - even if they are douches and just run their mouth, it's handy to have a few giant Green Mile looking guys to form a wall. Kenny, meanwhile, is in charge of pillow fluffing and other nonsense. If an actual situation happened, any bigger type dude would knock Kenny unconscious while using Jimmy as a crossfit jump rope.

Then rappers need "staff". Not their friend from third grade who carries his kicks

They need (and usually have, if they are smart) both. I mean you don't NEED 12 guys, you need like 2, but 10 is more imposing and impressive if you are trying to showboat.

Yeah I totally agree with you. I'm just making banter at this point.

Plus they're generally horrible people, with too much money and a lack of human decency.

Louis CK doesn't travel with a body guard

I would imagine that none do except the absolute upper crust like Seinfeld.

Schumer does. But guys like Jerry probably have managers & agents and shit like that traveling with them but I doubt he has "muscle". I imagine Jerry travels with half a dozen middle age Jews

He thinks he's Dice

Dice had thousands of people protesting outside his shows. I get why he had a couple bodyguards.

And Jim thinks he's Dice

Jim is Dice circa 2016.

Guys at Seinfeld's level don't fly the same way we do, I'd bet Jerry owns his own Lear jet and doesn't bother with the main terminal with the rest of us plebs. No need for bodyguards, really, unless they're dealing with the public - but Jerry goes to games all the time without a guard.

Unless there's a distinct reason for personal protection, most celebs will fly with a personal assistant - which is what Kenny is. I have no doubt Seinfeld has a couple, who run his schedule and such when traveling.

If Cabbage Patch Amy flies private (she does), you know Jerry does. He owns a Gulfstream V.

Most grownups don't.

Kenny isn't a body guard, he's a personal assistant - which is very common in the entertainment field, it's a symbol of success. Which Jim desperately needs, since he's incapable of moving up in the world on talent alone.

Jim Morton is a fancy man and demands a man servant to lug around his soft pillows when traveling.

hes more a brutal savage out to offence, the world is not ready for the edge he brings to the stage

I've heard Jim tell exactly one story about "needing" Kenny for security. He said he was in a 7-11 and Jim got a "vibe" from some guy who seemed drunk and was kinda looking at him and getting closer. So Jim went outside to get Kenny and when they came back in the guy kept his distance. That's the entire story.

The guy was probably just next in line.

He needs him because early birds have been known to try and "get" him.

I like having power over men bigger than me. I am a little sad man.

White Trash Sunset Boulevard

But Jim is a very small man and luggage is heavy.

For real, isn't Jim only 5" 8"? Imagine him trying to manage a couple of suitcases for an intercontinental flight.

Conor McGregor is only 5'9" and he towers over Jim in that horribly uncomfortable UFC video.

I always assumed Sirius paid Kenny most of his salary, especially considering he seems to drive both Opie and Jim to and from work. He also does a lot of the basic tasks, like getting them food and coffee, while they are on the radio. Keith the Cop and Master Po were also Sirius paid guys doing a similar job. Howard Stern also has a little old guy doing that same job. Kenny and Keith are retired cops who could just live off their pension, so they just want to make extra money and do something during the day.

One of Jimmy's first big breaks was getting hired by Andrew Dice Clay, and Kenny was doing for Dice, what he now does for Jimmy, so it's more like Jimmy inherited the guy. Kenny=Lenny from "Of Mice and Men."

Part of it is because Baby Boy is never happy with his accommodations and he's too much of an emotional bitch to handle it himself so Kenny handles the customer service reps.

Only 3 chocolate strawberries on her pillow? Call Kenny to head down and make things right because she'll just scream at the desk clerk and not accomplish anything.

More like F list

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James J. Norton is a single 50 year old D list comedian sex addict who posts platonic selfies with women he'll never fuck and then goes home to pay mentally ill / physically weak young 'men' on estrogen treatments to let him fuck them in their assholes.

Rated pg-13

The kind of "women" Jimmy prefers are all bigger and stronger than he is. Hence Kenny to protect him incase something goes wrong.

Can someone photoshop him and kenny together as madter blaster from Mad Max? Pretty please?

baby boy is ascaird of being alone and will ultimately die alone which is great. I bet they die like an old couple. Kenny dies then worm in his grief seemingly healthy dies shortly after and joins him in fag heaven.

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Everyone who donated to the chip cartoon is paying for Kenny.. come on folksschhh. Rich Vos at Rockwells This weekend

Schumer does. But guys like Jerry probably have managers & agents and shit like that traveling with them but I doubt he has "muscle". I imagine Jerry travels with half a dozen middle age Jews

He thinks he's Dice

Guys at Seinfeld's level don't fly the same way we do, I'd bet Jerry owns his own Lear jet and doesn't bother with the main terminal with the rest of us plebs. No need for bodyguards, really, unless they're dealing with the public - but Jerry goes to games all the time without a guard.

Unless there's a distinct reason for personal protection, most celebs will fly with a personal assistant - which is what Kenny is. I have no doubt Seinfeld has a couple, who run his schedule and such when traveling.