I need to reevaluate my life.

32  2016-07-31 by I_Hate_Knockers

I'm a 29 year old bachelor working for UPS. The pay is fair but the work is hard. I own a 2 bedroom condo and a 2005 Mustang. It's fine, but I want more.

I'm not going to improve sticking around here. This seems like a funny place, but it's just a mask for the depression. I see myself in every last one of you. I drink way too much. That ends now, too.

It's time for me to help myself. I hope you all find happiness, too. You're a good bunch of guys. Especially stinkskc. I hope your life works out, Ian. You're the one guy here who is so much of a mess that I can feel good about myself. I read your posts about your life and thought "I can't be that bad. Look at him." I let it enable me.

Well, I'm off. A new me. Maybe some day we'll meet again. Honest best wishes for you all.

Except /u/I_Hate_Knickers, who is a child molester.

96 comments

You say odd shit to people, dude.

PEERIOD.

sniff

sips starbucks

Nothing works here, I hate this place, the medication doesn't work,I've been here for 7 years,nothing works here, I hate this place, the medication doesn't work,I've been here for 7 years,nothing works here, I hate this place, the medication doesn't work,I've been here for 7 years,nothing works here, I hate this place, the medication doesn't work,I've been here for 7 years

see ya in a week

Gunshot

Hopefully

I wonder what his new username will be.

Is stinkskc taken?

I believe it is.

Can confirm

I knew you wouldn't last. You don't got the sand.

It's been nice knowin ya.

NOT!

Schumering my material?

Nailed him!

Did you bang the married pregnant broad?

No. I realized that she was atrocious. Now she keeps calling and I'm hiding from her.

Plus the husband threatened to sew your ass to your face.

Yeah but between you and me my real fantasy involves that.

Twist ending!

FAWKIN BURIED THAT COCKSUCKAH

You say "bachelor", I hear "virgin".

Funny, I hear 'homo proudboy'

You're obviously a CUCK ashamed of his MASCULINE SIDE, afraid to embrace the GORILLA MINDSET. Maybe you should be a real man and have some children, embrace Jesus, get married, and listen to THE CLASH. If you don't support TRUMP, and consider FEMINISM IS CANCER then you don't deserve to rep UHURU. I haven't used SHAMPOO in a month, I listen to BLACK FLAG, I got banned from TWITTER because of lady GHOSTBUSTERS. I can read the BELL CURVE statistics backwards at this point. I used to be a LIBTARD but one day I started wearing DOC MARTENS and CONVERSE and I realized NOW I'M TALKING UNCENSORED

I remember the SRD post on this. Classic

A real man has an asshole so beautifully bleached and groomed you would be proud to serve Christmas dinner to your grandmother on it.

What about any of that do you actually disagree with?

I hear closet homo

Can we stop with the feelings shit

Anthony?

This nigga makes 37 an hour on straight time and wants to complain about life? Eat a dick son.

Just hold on you fucking fruit

"I thought they were giving the man UPS."

if this is your outlet for depression then be happy it exists, it can show itself in a lot of uglier ways

Oh cool, another "I'm gonna leave this place and better myself" post. Fuck off, you'll be back and no one will care

That's the spirit!

Bet the mustang's a v6.

and an automatic

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I'm glad I can do some good in the world of o&a sub

Deliver a gun to your condo and shoot yourself.

UPS is your idea of hard work with okay pay? Yeah, you'd better re evaluate, kid.

Im 42 and literally live in my mothers basement, her health isnt doing too well so Im getting ready for the big movin' on up day!

There's a Phil hendrie character based on you

I was waiting for a chip roll, instead I got an actual soap box post. What a fruit.

here's looking at you kid

Best wishes.

Who are you?

You'll be back once you realize the world has nothing for you but this sub. Godspeed.

Mang yourself.

Look forward to hearing this read on the news over a photo of you pointing a gun at the camera.

29 and working for UPS? too late, you wont change ... even if you could what do you have to offer besides being a pack mule ?

UPS is a pretty good job. They are Teamster in NYC. How do you think he affords the big condo and the bitchin' 'Stang?

he has the same car as my 8th grade teacher Mrs Leroux ... im 23 and i have a downtown condo ... big fucking deal

Downtown where? Also: having your parents buy or give you a down payment for a condo is nothing to brag about. What are you Soulja Boy or Rihanna?

not NYC, but downtown Toronto ... i live at the corner of younge & rich (not a joke) ... i got a co-signer. paid for everything myself. show biz baby

Is this Drake?

sir you may call me a jew or a nigger; but never a nigger jew

That's cool that you own that stuff. I own a dilapidated studio co-op. And a lot of animosity.

Best of luck. Set goals for yourself. Learn a new language. Meet a few chicks. Master a hobby. See you in the next life compadre.

RIP_Knickers

Okay.

Have you tried consuming a bottle of Tylenol? That might fix things.

2 Tylenol helps relieve the pain, the whole bottle removes the pain completely.

Did you just come here to brag, Mr fancy job?

N*gga this package car ain't gonna load itself

Good luck, bro

I will grab your hair and knee you in the fucking face

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Salt of the earth Joe.

"Don't be mad, UPS is hiring."

See you tomorrow.

Good luck bro

I'm shitfaced and the hole I convinced to come home with me left before I could orgasm... so this touched my drunken heart. Good luck, sir.

gun shot

So, you're saying Opie Does have tits?

Well I like the part about u/I_Hate_Knickers being a child molester. That guy really does do some despicable things with children from what I've heard. Shame on him. Shame. On. Him

If you think that a subreddit is the thing holding you back, you already lost.

Good luck sir.

You can get anti-depressants and go back to school or whatever and still stop in here for a daily dose of depravity. They don't have to be mutually exclusive.

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No one cares, faggot.

Who the fuck's Ian? You're on first name terms and making public pronouncements of how Ian makes you feel better about yourself?

Maybe you should stop drinking.

Ian is /u/stinkskc and you know it.

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💩

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I know that feeling of depression, man. These guys helped me a lot. Maybe you should call in and ask for their help? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BgRvYhNitM8&hd=1

Lets see, You are young, single, you have a job and likes to drink. What the fuck do you have to be depressed about? Except for how Opie ruined radio.

Wait, what are you? I never know if you're legit or some gay parody of knickers, or even knickers himself. Same with the new cbanks420"iol" account.

Tsss why don't you work for fawkin' DOWNS you peesa gahbij

Fawkin clevah!

Have you considered the Proud Boys?

Why are you bragging about a fucking 2005 Mustang?

I didn't think he was bragging about it, but probably saying that it's paid for.

Love you bro

i don't care

So you are going to stop emulating "I hate knickers" and steal some other poor sack of shit's originality

Try adopting a personality that isn't so weak

Is this foreal? I can't keep up with the inside jokes around here anymore

The 15 minutes a day you spend here while taking a shit is definitely the only thing separating you from not being a loser.

Don't forget to subscribe to /r/nofap and /r/GetMotivated too. Very essential for success.

sir you may call me a jew or a nigger; but never a nigger jew

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