My extended unified grand theory on Jim's role on the show
59 2016-07-27 by WhatTooReal
Jimmy wants to have a say only when he can use the show to:
- Defend comic friends (for example Schumer)
- Be around women he wants to have sex with (porn stars, schumer)
- Meet A-list celebrities and get photos with them (Paul McCartney)
NEW:
- Get revenge on someone (DL Hughley)
Top 4 things Jimmy doesn't want anything to do with:
- Coming up with ideas for the show
- Improving the show in other ways
- Marketing the show
- Being publicly associated with the show
He ordered a pizza and is now complaining he isn't getting a hamburger. Like a baby boy.
25 comments
19 bigmattson 2016-07-27
I think that's pretty close to accurate. I also think that his original "I don't want my name on the show" shit he pulled after Ant got fired and they resigned was because he was mad he isn't making Opie money.
That name came back real quick today after his meeting with Wickland. My guess is they reassured our little buddy that they would take care of him come October.
10 cottonsweatpants 2016-07-27
A bigger apartment to fit all the kiss memorabilia he bought with that crowdfunding money!
18 antchya 2016-07-27
Was wondering when Opie would chime in
28 ihaveaholeinmyass 2016-07-27
This is too coherent to come out of opies head.. Opies head is full of glitter and skittles
13 jaghutgathos 2016-07-27
and sunsets !!
12 SumEdv2 2016-07-27
And Peckas
1 RolandLovecraft 2016-07-27
AAAh peckaaa.
18 NumeroOtto 2016-07-27
jim is a stupid hypocrite
13 late_50s_why 2016-07-27
remember right b4 ona ends he would be complete silent for an hr or so after the show started, busy tweeting/browsing facebook etc., u cant even tell if hes in studio or not
b4 that if patrice or burr were in studio he wouldnt talk neither because those 2 may replace him so he would just throw a hissy fit
4 jazzmercenary 2016-07-27
It's real strange the xm heads didn't try and get Patrice on board after he replaced Jim for that month or so when he was off shilling in Hollywood, they probably could have gotten him for cheaper considering their relative careers at the time. Plus they would appeal to a wider audience with the coloreds.
Then again I guess Dipaolo was right when he said mediocrity sells, as hilarious as Patrice was he was way edgier (politically, not in the "I suck tranny cock teehee" way) and was probably way worse at selling himself then Jim is. It's a damn shame because the debates between Ant and Patrice were constant and organic even though their chemistry was so good together, and even tits managed to vibe with Patrice from time to time, at least when he wasn't busy shushing him
4 late_50s_why 2016-07-27
They shouldve use rotating comedian guests at the very least, how many times can we listen to the same chicks with dicks joke without getting sick
Maybe opie protected him or something who knows, but baby boy had got to go
2 DickAction 2016-07-27
I'm sold. Call the necromancer. It's time to resurrect Patrice for the good of the show.
9 ShadowbannedKeithM 2016-07-27
How about walking in 5 minutes before they go on air everyday. Must be infuriating. "That's just how I perform" was what he said to Opie during their first fight. I should try that at work and see if the boss is good with it.
-3 americanmook 2016-07-27
Doesn't matter. Jimmy has the talent for it. Maybe Opie should sleep at the studio to get some.
7 NevadaJPH 2016-07-27
Jim has earned too much goodwill for the eame 5 jokes recycled for the last 15 years
13 cottonsweatpants 2016-07-27
Oh yeah?
Doctor Kevorkorian, other end of a shotgun, I ENJOY THE COMPANY OF WOMEN WITH PENISES!
9 late_50s_why 2016-07-27
baby boi tranny hookers lol!!
2 ShadowbannedKeithM 2016-07-27
"Get aids and die. Then go fuck your mother and flush your Sirius radio down the toilet." That's some talent right there, just like his advice show.... Yawn
6 PrisonOfGlass 2016-07-27
Your bullet game is on-point.
6 throwawaymanthrows 2016-07-27
Here's what frustrates me about Yimmy. He's pissed about having no say, but he makes no actual effort. Even during the good old days, he was texting or otherwise fucking around on his phone during broadcasts a lot of the time. I was listening to some old shows and I noticed there were a lot of times when he would just fall silent for like half an hour.
It's kind of bullshit to act indignant and put upon when in reality you're usually doing a half ass job.
3 [deleted] 2016-07-27
Addicts lie. I think CQ's assessment of his character as a complete phony is accurate. He say what suits him in the given moment to make himself look good. He lies and connives constantly.
2 panasonictooth 2016-07-27
Is addiction to cum a thing?
3 yourunconscious 2016-07-27
And vetoing guests like Gavin Mcinnes.
2 davedave8 2016-07-27
At this point, Jim brings as much to the show as Mark Normand.
1 ScarletNumbers 2016-07-27
unified?
1 [deleted] 2016-07-27
[deleted]
0 RealKeeny 2016-07-27
Lmfao, an accurate and on point theory. Second bulletpoint had me dying. Bunch of fucking legit funny commenters on this subreddit
9 late_50s_why 2016-07-27
baby boi tranny hookers lol!!