You wanna suck my dick for practice? Don't want to show up there looking like a rube.

I gotta get off this sub before this is me. Your moms box. I hate this place I've been here for 7 years.

Just dont do herion and you should be good. But it is quite fun to ride the gravy train.

Thanks but at 30 years old I'm good with adding new drug addictions I'm at a good spot right now with speed,vodka, and weed. God speed you isis mother hucker!

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I don't anymore

Time flies when your a faggot

Will your mother be taking over your account?

Von Decarlo will.

still waiting on that cruisin_colin documentree.

Nope she's dead so she only post at mildly infuriating with titles like " Tfw worms are eating your flesh" And "When the Mexican day laborers steal from your grave"

This is Ian's mother, it's a very fun hobby and gives me something to do now that I don't have to clean up after my son

Your son was an absolute pig on here. Glad to see you cleaning up the stinkskc image.

Post your tits

Lucky. I wish I could take a 3 year vacation. You going some place warm?

Enjoy the buttsex.

Doesn't make you a bad person.

So, uh....you must be a brown feller...

whatd you do? id fucking DIE if i had to go to jail, sorry bro!

Trial starts this week so I Don't wanna say much but I allegedly said some shit at work and allegedly had a handgun in my car and I may of had to allegedly clear my name to the fbi because I had money from the United Arab Emerates in my wallet so my local pd thought I was an Islamic state sleeper cell. All alleged tho.

I'm not buyin' it

I wish i was joking man. If I was able to tell the whole story you'd believe it even less. Shits fucked

Send me a message, I'll keep your secret

Sure and then I'll be in court and hear them say, umm sir we just got a letter from a man claiming to be your friend going by I hate knickers and its just a bunch of emojis and the words allah akbar, would you care to explain.

You don't think they could decipher a testimony from Knickers?

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No you come back here and shut up.

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Well tell that cell to wake up. We're not paying it to snooze all day.

terroristic threat + unlicensed firearm + sandnigger money?

:(

Well not a terrorist threat but I was having an argument with this married woman I was seeing at work and it was clear that it was over and me being wacked out of my skull on oxys and that I just my virginity to a thai hooker a few months ago I was pretty upset and said some regrettable shit. And she passive agressively pushed me to say that shit and seeing an opportunity to wash her hands of me she jumped on it. Women are cunts, the first woman I fucked gave me a std and the first Woman to fuck me that wasnt a hooker gave me felonies. :(

That's fucked dude. First time I tried to fuck I couldn't get hard, so I kinda know where you're coming from.

That's not your fault..tell that cunt to be more sexy next time?

You're going to have a hard time in prison Ahmed,better lube up that boipussy

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Were you riding around trying to pick up vulnerable hipster twinks who got friend-zoned by their sultry-voiced female room-mate/girlfriend who occasionally fucks asian males bc she hates herself and secretly enjoys cucking this beta while simultaneously wishing he would be a man for once in his life and commit to a relationship,or at least beat up that smelly chink?

I believe everything except you had money in your wallet.

Okay this is gonna sound like made up shit but life is stranger than fiction sometimes but here are the dominos that fell leading to me having that money. I meet married bitch and shes the first woman to show interest but I was too beta to make a legit move. So I decide to go to Thailand to fuck hookers to raise confidence to make a move. On the last night in Thailand a hooker steals my debit card. I had a lay over in abu dhabi on my way home and got some McDonald's at the airport, because my debit was stolen all I had was cash and I got change back in UAE money and I just kept it in my wallet with leftover thai baht.

shouldn't be hard to prove since you bought plane tickets.. there's more to this story, the gun/drugs/oxys are much more of a problem than some unlikely terrorism thing.

Yeah that part is all cleared up for now at least

Please don't tell me that you used the public defender.

may of

You deserve everything you get.

Case of mistaken Antwan?

Funny enough I'm a wop and I had a big beard so I looked the part.

Jail is the worst

Prison is worse.

Liver wurst

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I'm aware, just saying jail sucks ass too

Well the good ones do.

;)

Don't accept any favors from anyone, show anyone who asks for it your 'paperwork' when you hit the yard the first time, follow the code and more importantly do your time and not someone else's.

Good luck man although chances are if you are a first-offender, you can probably get off with your sentence in probation but man Heroin is a heavy charge.

Yeah my first charge and I didn't get any drug charges just the gun charges but I doubt ill get lucky and get probation, my family drained my bank account while I was waiting on bond(Which was 100 fucking thousand) So with no money I have a public defender.

Why did they have access to your bank account?

I needed someone to get money out for my bond, my mother is dead and I don't know my father so my only option at the time was my cunt aunt because my friend was out of state for the week. Long story short I have negative 658 bucks in the bank now.

Goddamn, that's murder worthy right there. How'd you get so much money? That is, if you're not receiving money to fund your terrorist operations. I assume you're young since you said you lost your virginity recently.

Yeah im in my early 20s and you only pay 10% Of your bond so I put my car up and only had to pay 4k

So how did you have over $100,000?

Edit: nevermind, I misread. Your bond was over $100,000. I thought you got ripped off for that much.

The bond was 100k not the account. I had a little under 12k in the bank

Yeah, I misinterpreted that part.

Alright, no need to kick him when he's down.

I'll kick you while you're down, Knickers. Kick you right in the asshole, is what I'd do.

The bond was 100k not the account. I had a little under 12k in the bank

How'd you get so much money?

I had a good job....had

You forgot the most important piece of advice... walk in find the biggest guy and punch him Square in the nose.

Are you guilty?

It's the law if someone asks you, you have to tell the truth.

It was a John, from the John & Jeff show, type of a Thailand visit wasn't it?

People would really have to search that shit out in Thailand to find it, its not what tv makes you believe. What you do see everywhere is 4'8 90 pound Asian women with fat tits that will fuck you for 20 bucks. Its paradise.

If any gang tries to recruit you, I'd strongly suggest joining the Proud Boys.

How many prison breakfast cereals can you name?

What did you do nubs?

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don't let anybody find out that you are in there for pedophilia, or you are literally fucked. peace bra!

You punched a cop! You punched a cop!

Wear some sneakers in the shower nigga. It's for traction.

Good luck. If you want to know more about jail, I'd recommend tweeting @anthonycumia.

Pm me if you need any help or have any questions.

this is a story of small time anthony, when you get out... stop hanging out with crazy bitches of all ages.

Whereabouts are you located, fella?

Where we at with the ass rape?

You never should have danced with the Lady H.

I did 13 months in Spring Creek when I was 21. I Used to stuff those fuckin fairies into lockers just to pass the time. Probably still telling stories about Rustys corner

Prisons not for queers, son. You best be ready to rumble in those walls if respect means a damn thing to you

Shut up homo

shouldn't be hard to prove since you bought plane tickets.. there's more to this story, the gun/drugs/oxys are much more of a problem than some unlikely terrorism thing.

Please don't tell me that you used the public defender.