"I'd never have the balls to do that as a comic"-Jim The play-it-safe kid

15  2016-07-20 by EncinoEscobar

8 comments

I'll fuck dozens of tranny hookers without a condom, but a political joke is where I draw the line of recklessness. That would just be irresponsible.

He's probably never actually fucked a tranny he just says it to be "weird". It also makes all his jokes pretty straightforward, they write themselves. Just take any normal observation and add a bit about trannies at the end.

"I'd never have the balls to do that as a comic"

  • Write modern material without late 80s-90s tryhard vibe
  • Stop pretending material is anything but a cheap facsimile of Carlin and Pryors edge with none of the longevity or cultural relevance
  • Stop trying to "shock" people and write actual modern and relevant material even if having to work with other writers or change direction slightly instead of rehashing the same jokes with different celebrities or news stories that are a year old when the special is filmed
  • Deliver punchlines without leaning forward and opening eyes wide like "eh? eh?" to signal everyone that they are supposed to laugh
  • Travel internationally
  • Challenge myself to not keep repeating the humor that dosen't work
  • Look at my successful peers work and acts to see why they surpassed me professionally by tens of millions of dollars / fans
  • Look at my successful peers work and acts to see why my material is unintentionally cringe inducing and embarrasing for professionals around me to try and promote
  • Travel without a security guard / mother figure
  • Form relationships with industry professionals without creeping them out via my material and general child molester vibe
  • Let a successful comic with some actual good advice mentor my career
  • Get a better agent / manager who knows how to steer my career and build a real fan base
  • Take some acting / improv classes to learn how to act natural when speaking lines
  • Stop following celebs around with a pen, prints, and cameras, and act like a goddamn professional so people respect and not laugh at me
  • Come out of the closet, as a gay and / or transvestite comic as it will only help me in the current political climate
  • Wear grown man clothing most of the time instead of giant text band or MMA shirts that come off as needy and "ask me about my shirt" distractions instead of just occasionally wearing something band related because I like it
  • Find some modern bands to like instead of constantly gushing over KISS, aka 70s Insane Clown Posse, because it makes me look like I'm emotionally stuck in middle school to those around me
  • Speak up on SXM when I think Opie says something incorrect or stupid (aka constantly), as the tension and arguments are more interesting that sitting around agreeing with everything so I don't get fired while I look at my phone
  • Stop making shit "talk" format shows. I am not an attractive host, and my talents are in writing, quips, and man on the street type interviews, not the main host of a generic talk show
  • Stop getting suckered into website and app designers that essentially steal my money. Deep down I know I could just pay a legit firm 10K or so to have a real site that functions normally and creates engagement with my fans and not a "what the fuck is this shit" when someone views it. I spend tens of thousands of dollars on cameras and framing, it's time I spent that much on my website and app as I am a professional and not a local clown for hire
  • Peckahs
  • Stop making shit animation with a company with a sketchy reel and terrible work. I pay tens of thousands of dollars on massages / prostitutes / etc., I can drop more than a few thousand on a product I expect my fans to help me produce
  • Revise and expand this list on a weekly, monthly, and yearly basis to grow as a person and help my career

Have some spare time today I take it?

If you've listened to the show a while, it just flows out like free-from jazz, man, can you dig it?

I'll give you credit, it's both good advice and I actually read it till the end which is more than I can say about 99% of the wall of texts here.

Jim is a comic?

I read better lines from assholes here than what Morton shits out his face hole.

I guess some folks love the Cosby/Sandusky and tranny yoomah,