I put three Alphabrain up my ass and had a lucid dream that I ate a machine elf's pussy.

I loved that Philip K. Dick novel "Do Electric Alphabrains Dream of Mechanical Pussy?"

Between the Dune thread and these two comments, I finally feel at home here. Lemme set my mood organ to homosexually satisfied. #69

you read. we get it.

No, the point was I like science fiction and Terrence McKenna. You illiterate faggot.

we get it. you read.

No, the point was I like Terrence McKenna and science fiction. Faggot, illiterate, you.

you fag. we reddit.

I can't make you look worse than you just did

I should have known better than to tangle with a Terrence McKenna/science fiction type.

Better than a reddit type, lets be honest. WE REDDIT! UNITE! Go get raped by a pack of Dassabessos

not sure if you know how things work around here.

no matter you still lose. GOOD DAY

nobody wants you here, queer

Fascinating

did u use the code word rogan?

Lol bro, lol...

I take Alphabrain while practicing my shadowboxing and spinning heel kicks. I am basically the man from limitless now.

I use my battle rope while popping shroomtech sport. I am become death, destroyer of worlds.

Don't forget to groom young Boston boys, their bottoms turn you into a werewolf if you eat it right

Dude, I take shroomtech immune thrice daily and fuck AIDS patients. So far, so great!!

only when i'm inside my isolation tank

Sorry to break the circlejerk here, but for all his shill medicine and quackery, Rogan does make good content. His comedy may not be the best, but it's still above the average.

Also, he's one of the few people who does promote a good lifestyle in this society where being a dirty slob is not only the norm but is promoted as a virtue.

Any way you take it, the guy is a positive force in the world.

his podcast used to be decent before he took himself too seriously, and honestly how many times do you need to hear about Bigfoot or whatever the fuck he rambles about nowadays

I swing around kettlebells like a gorilla retard after taking MCT oil.

btw this is the podcast norton and matt serra are trying to copy

Luis Gomez does the same thing with Michael Bisping. It seems to be the template they're all going for, comic and fighter/ex-fighter

well at least gomez and bryan are legit fans

Is Norton a legit fan of anything?

Ozzy \m/

Ozzy and Sharon.

KISS, kissing celebrity ass until he gets photos, kissing "ladies" of the night

"legit fan", we're talking about watching people play sports. There's nothing impressive about being a legit fan.

But it's embarrassing when a person don't even have the basic knowledge on the subject, it's like Opie talking about baseball, documentary, music etc.

the baseball, documentree, muzak*

Music and hockey are the most painful

I'm pretty sure he's the guy who started this whole podcasting thing. So pretty much everyone is trying to copy him.

It's the official Joerogan2 sub reunion

As soon as i saw the top question was about those shitty placebo pills i knew it was going to be good.

I can't come up with a clever response because the beans I used in this morning's coffee didn't have the mold removed first.

you need to put them up your cats ass

Yeah, they should have stuck to r/mma for that one.

[deleted]

I wouldn't really call it a trend, besides Matt Serra is actually kinda funny. Brendan is a total meat head douche though riding entirely off of Rogan's dick.

The only good UFC interview: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V1R50LpFh_M

Forrest is a funny dude, he doesn't get enough camera time anymore though. Also, this Chael Sonnen interview is pretty funny: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jHAGXlIyprQ

I read Forrest's first book (I forgot the name) and it was pretty damn funny, but they took up a bunch of pages with fighting positions in the end, otherwise the book wouldve been much shorter.

It's not a trend, or even a thing.

Must be the CTE.

Donald Cerrone is the funniest guy in MMA. Every time he is on JRE or Fighter and the Kid, I download immediately.

And the kid? Bryan callen is like 50.

That's the bit! I think?

[deleted]

Holy shit, I thought no one was more vicious than the maniacs on this subreddit, but that was a whole other level of hate.

I accidentally left my hedgehog in my float tank and he exploded.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Yw5jkAHgME

(Booooooo)

I liked Bryan Callen on MAD TV all of those years ago. What a strange arc.

I only saw his stand-up once where he was doing a practice set for a room of maybe 20 people. Some good material. He hung around after the show and couldn't have been a nicer guy.

No peckas.

Ugh. Wish I was around for that! Brendan Schaub is up there with Sherrod, Kurt and Opie as my least favorite people in entertainment.

What about derosa?

Whatever. DeRosa's an annoying pussy but he genuinely contributed to the show.

i think that bryan fella is worse than brendan on their podcast, that bryan is really awful

THIS IS YOUR DAILY REMINDER TO PLUG IN YOUR BLENDERS, HEAT UP YOUR FLOTATION TANKS TO SKIN TEMP (35.5*C)

THE WEED HAS BEEN LIT AND IT'S TIME TO SLAM YOUR KALE SHAKES, TAKE A TOKE & MARK OFF YOUR CHECKLIST

TO POP YOUR:

• ALPHA BRAIN

• SHROOMTECH

• KRILL & MCT OIL

• PRIMATE CARE PILLS

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=22GjkJw0WXk <---- HIT PLAY NIGGA

YOUR FEAR FACTOR THEME SONG ALARM BLASTS THROUGH YOUR HOUSE

YOU INSTINCTIVELY JUMP INTO YOUR HOMEMADE OCTAGON, FITTED WITH BATTLE-ROPES AND A "WRECKING BALL" STYLE CHIMP KETTLEBELL ACTION COURSE

AFTER YOUR INTENSE WORKOUT YOU CALL OVER BRIAN REDBAN USING TING BEFORE GETTING INTO YOUR ISOLATION SENSORY DEPRIVATION FLOTATION TANK AND PACKING YOUR MOUTH TO THE BRIM WITH POT BROWNIES FOLLOWED SHORTLY AFTERWARDS BY COCONUT WATER ENEMAS JUST AS THE DMT KICKS IN AS YOU LISTEN TO DUNCAN TRUSSEL AND GRAHAM HANCOCK HYPOTHESIZE THAT THE PYRAMIDS = ALIENS AND THE ARK OF THE COVENANT IS HIDDEN IN UGANDA

DUDE BOOOOM LMAO

DUDE KETTLEBELLS LITERALLY ENCRUSTED WITH WEED AND DUNKED IN MCT OIL AND THROWN OFF BUILDINGS FEAR FACTOR STYLE

"BRENDAN SCHAUB JUST END IT ALL, I THINK YOU ARE A WORTHLESS FIGHTER AND I HATE YOU, BUT COME BACK ON THE PODCAST SO I CAN BLOW YOU THE FUCK OUT OF THE WATER AGAIN AND REDUCE YOU TO TEARS"

"BRENDAN "FRASER" "FUCK MY SHIT UP" SCHAUB, JUST TAKE THE EASY WAY OUT. YOUR CAREER IS OVER. IT'S TIME FOR THE SMITH AND WESSON RETIREMENT PLAN"

• Joe Rogan, 2015

YOU ARE NOW PICTURING JOE ROGAN NAKED IN A FLOTATION TANK WITH A MOUTH FULL OF POT BROWNIES TRIPPING

• Brought to you by SquareSpace©

cue the hempforce mustard

I didn't have any opinion on Brendan Schaub before reading that and after following some of the YT links I now think he's a douche. There was the story he told about throwing a college roommate through a glass window because the guy didn't wanna fight him and there was a bunch of references to that. Reddit is hilarious when I have nothing better to do.

Despicable story

I was in my isolation tank this morning and it occurred to me. It's like, everything is connected on a molecular level. You know?

"Brendan, does Ronda's vagina really have teeth?"

Bryan Callen is the most unfunny douchebag on the face of the earth.

Besides Opie

That's hilarious, I fucking always miss AMA's on reddit.

"They were never my friends." - Dana Hogan

Bryan Callen and Brendan Shaub are grade A #1 douchebags. Watch them on any fight companion JRE and you can see it instantly.

Can somebody explain what the dynamic is between Joe Rogan's followers and his show? Is it another bunch of disgruntled, jaded fucks who turned on their heroes once they realized how shitty they were all these years?

Sort of, I think. I used to like rogan's show more a few years ago, but now I get super annoyed if he starts talking about "think how weird that shit is, we are just on a rock hurtling through space" type of stuff. That being said, I don't hold the hate a lot of anti-rogan people. If there is an interesting guest on I will still check it out.

It just gets to a point where you have heard someones opinions on things so much you can basically predict what they will say. Just look at people predict how Opie and Jim will open a show (with stunning accuracy btw), or how Anthony will respond to a shooting. We all know what is going to basically come out of their mouths, it just isn't interesting anymore.

[deleted]

No, he was asking about the ones that turned.

Broooooodul

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do these guys have anything to do with 'Punch Drunk Sports' ?

I checked it out because Ari is on it, but he actually is barely on it at all, and the other guys are just....wow.

People are unfair about onnit, seems like a legit company that they believe in (just cause I think alpha brain is bs doesn't mean they do- plus all the other shit they sell is legit ). Anyways I loved this cause Schaub is just the worst

Between the Dune thread and these two comments, I finally feel at home here. Lemme set my mood organ to homosexually satisfied. #69