What are your girlfriend's tits like? In case I have to step in.

She's no longer my girlfriend but they really suck. Some of the worst I've encountered. If she wasn't a great cook I'd have never ate her pussy.

Was she frying up her pussy and serving it with garnish?

She's better than that, as a chef. But she did try stripping for a while and thought that the pussy spray could erase all natural sins. She was wrong.

The more you describe her the better she sounds. Why did you break up again?

A brief retreat from alcoholism.

I once dated a daytime stripper. I don't know why I did that. She's couldn't even cook.

description. how were they bad? gross slabs of pancake skin, pepperoni nips, teenage boy chested? c'mon man

Like wind socks on a day with no wind

thank you for that analogy. I hope i never need to witness it

just out of proportion with her torso. Like they were Cs strapped on a double D body.

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Nowadays it ain't dinner unless its uploaded and hash-tagged first. Fucking annoying cunts.

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Well thanks for enlightening us with your witty quips. #doingmypart

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I was thinking about this at work today, I'm rarely on my phone at work, just use it for Pandora. When I looked around work every single person was staring at their phone, it has gotten so bad that work had to change wifi password and block gaming and other sites. It's crazy, I try to limit my screen time, but any restaurant you go to people don't even talk to each other they are just staring at their phones. I have a coworker who thinks memes are the most hilarious thing ever and he has to show one every 20 minutes it seems, I want to smash his phone over his head, so yes we becoming internet people and I don't think it will get any better

Until they make me manager and I say "Faggots on phones get fired the second time they are caught! No exceptions!"

As someone stares at you typing this god awful boring post above thinking the same about you...oh the irony.

Go make another alt crying about shadowbannedkiethm you fucking mental retard. I hope you fucking die tonight you waste of fucking space.

Let me download that and process it for a few parsecs.

get better friends

It's real. You can't go anywhere without fucking drones' faces plastered to their phone. Movies, restaurant, traffic, shit you see somebody on their front porch they're looking at their phone. It's disgusting. To me, anyways.

I'll pull a Bud Dwyer if I see one more shitty Bud Dwyer reference in this sub.

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Whats on the phone is more interesting than whats on the menu, and very likely more interesting than the other people at the table. Technology is a superior product when compared to humanity and people being rational consumers therefore prefer it.

Have you tasted technology yet?

This. Say something interesting and stop craving attention.

https://www.reddit.com/r/opieandanthony/comments/4dxtk8/yknow_someone_close_to_ant_has_told_him_to_not/

Could you give me some advice on how to appear interesting on the internet?

People will definitely stop look at their phones... when they get implants

I'm looking forward to that. When people stop fucking around with their gizmos they might actually find time to appreciate a natural experience. Gizmos should be self-correcting.

They make fun of you your entire life for spending too much time on the internet

Now it's all they fucking do and you're sick of it

Yes. Also the jitterbug will be the downfall of society.

People have to move and interact to do the jitterbug you cunt.

It's not a fad it's a progression. There's not going to be a point in the future where we say "OMG rememeber how much time we used to spend with technology what were we thinking!? Thank goodness we're all back into eye contact now!" unless there's some apocalyptic event that literally makes it impossible.

Which, given the way things are going isn't beyond the realm of possibilty either.

I'm a fucking delight.

I think there will come a time where a technology bottleneck forces us to relapse into normal pastoral people again. That's when "culling the population" becomes a popular theme. China saw this coming and took steps. We currently encourage reckless procreation. We'll see an American genocide in our future because we worship at the altar of bullshit.

youre retarded

this isnt something new, has been happening for years

I listen to old O&A clips, Ron and Fez and Ricky Gervais Show literally all day everyday. When I'm not hanging out with friends or interacting with customers at work I'm listening to one of these dumb shows. Even fall asleep to em. It's almost like an addiction or a crutch. I don't stare at my phone much but I'm constantly getting audio from It.

You do that while you're out having dinner with friends? Because that's what I'm talking about.