I'm kind of on Jim's side here. I mean you wouldn't start fucking around with matches if you were standing next to a pile dynamite. Jimmy is a dark, twisted, tortured addict, you're walking on the razor's edge if you start tempting the demons which reside within his beautiful, damaged mind. One false move and in a half an hour he could be sipping wine coolers and making prank calls again.

I just lol'd

I know I rofl all the time.

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I love how with all of these at first I always think the person is serious

This is my favorite thing about his addiction bullshit, he doesn't even really know how to act like an addict. I've been sober for years, I don't freak out and cry if someone does a drug I didn't even abuse around me.

My friend smelled 3 marijuanas at once, and before be died he was screaming out for heroin and crack.

I nearly spit out my coffee at this one.

Jim acts like pot is a tranny's squezed and mangled dick after a long shift. Once you get a wiff,you're compelled to put your mouth around it.

People like him is why you can't smoke in the park or on the beach in some places. It's got nothing to do with health,but some weakling middle aged woman who sees someone smoking a cigg and her weak will makes her crave one so she and her triggered unfucked cohort campaign locally to have it banned,like that's a worthwhile cause in any way shape or form.

Same for bars and clubs, they don't want to be tempted in a social setting and they've banned it citing sh smoke.

Or because it smells like shit and makes people around you smell like shit.

This isn't highschool. No one wants to be a smoker.

I for one love the smell of tobacco so that's subjective sir. Plus you can't ban things for smelling bad or there'd be no one to run our gas stations.

I'm the resident indian in here and I find this incredibly offensive and extremely accurate

Cigarettes do tend to reek

For some reason cigars don't

Eh, they reek worse. The big diff is cig smoke sticks to everything. Cigars air out pretty easy, but that cig stink seeps into everything.

Agreed, Cigars have a much nastier odor than cigarettes, which don't exactly smell like roses either. But, I do remember going into tobacco shops when I was a kid and those places always smelled really nice for some reason.

Well the tobacco in a tobacco shop hasn't been smoked yet. It definitely has a nice distinct aroma. The smoke itself is the problem, and probably all the toxins they put in most cigarettes don't help either.

Nah man, this is smokers logic. I grew up in a smoking house so I never noticed it anywhere. After I moved out and my tolerance wore off you start to realize how much that shit carries and clings to everything. Last week my neighbor was in my house for 10 minutes wearing a coat she smokes in and my living roomed stunk the entire night. Fuck smokers, go live in a closet under a rock with that shit.

Apparently you swapped out your cigarettes for cocks, because this is the faggiest, most reddit comment I've read all week.

Gay guys are a lot tougher than me, homey.

You should have used "harder" instead of "tougher"

Why?

You know, like a cock.

Gregg "HookerMouth82" Hughes

no I'm Bobo

I'm sure it varies.

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He puts penises in his mouth.

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I'm saying vocal non-smokers are also pole smokers.

I smoked for years and then quit around 2 years ago. I realized soon after how much you reek of cigarettes when you smoke, especially if you smoke indoors. Just the grim realization of "this is what I smelled like all the time."

I know people who would say they like the smell and they must be filthy insane liars.

That was a stupid fucking thing to say you moron. But I have you an upvote because I'm a smoker and I hate myself

I turn into the Hulk if I smell pot smoke.

It's fun to make fun of Jimmy, but in truth, we really don't know what could happen. Philip Seymour Hoffman got sober youngish too (22). He had one celebratory drink and that led him to heroin and overdosing.

I've never seen an alcoholic go on a bender because they had some pot smoke blown in their face.

I've never seen a 16 year old alcoholic. I'm not willing to grant anyone that title until they go off to college & can't quit their binge drinking after they've graduated/flunked out.

I saw a program with a 17 year old booze addict. He stole a few bottles of vodka and ran away and got drunk in an alley for 3 days. THATS an addict.

JimME: but I was headed down that exact same road, you scumbag!

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I knew dudes who were 5 years into drinking by 16. When you're getting into fights with cops, there's clearly a problem.

Yeah it's being a dumbass teenager

I and basically all of the rest of my friends were able to party throughout high school without getting arrested or flipping our cars or really getting into any trouble at all. However, there were a few for whom the whole thing was a problem.

No shit. I smoke weed, drink, and used to use heroin. If someone was shooting up or smoking meth in front of me or snorting coke, I wouldn't do it, simply because I don't like those drugs and have no interest in them. Norton's a fucking idiot, just because you were "addicted" to one thing doesn't mean you're going to desire everything that gets you fucked up.

Edit: typo

Mannnnn if I had some fucking coke right now mmmmmm

I've done it a bunch but never really gave a shit about it, it was just something to do to combat boredom mostly. I don't think I've ever fiended for it like heroin or opiate pain meds.

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I probably wouldn't do any coke if someone offered it now, maybe a few years ago. Drugs have a harder effect on my body than they did years ago, if I take a fucking Benadryl now it'll knock me out and I'd feel like shit the entire next day. I definitely agree about benzos tho, I used to do wild shit when fucked up on xanax during my teens.

So you speak for all addicts then. good for you. Not self centred at all.

Funny, I'm looking for "all addicts do this" in my post, but I'm not seeing it.

Jim has talked about how he hates those people who are always trying to be the center of attention and are constantly going, "me, me, me", but that's exactly what he does by looking for every and any excuse to remind people that he's a "recovering addict."

I posted something to that jist a while ago. All three of them are perfect examples of becoming what we hate. Jim hates the me me me attitude but has no problem ruining his friends good times by obsessing over celebrity photos. Ant says he hates blacks because of their shitty attitudes and ruining neighborhoods but he flys around drones and has loud parties all night in his rich old Jewish neighborhood. Opie hated morning zoo radio but the O&J show is the worst morning zoo hack shit I've ever heard.

not to mention any time he has a problem with a product or service and he takes to twitter.

it's like poetry, it rhymes...

Anthony doesn't hate blacks, he hates niggers.

He's "addict" schtick is the same as a 16 yr old posting pictures of them smoking weed holding a bottle of vodka on Facebook. Attention seeking fagotry

He also once told his girlfriend that she couldn't come home spelling like pot because it was too much for him. I know guys in AA who smoke tons of pot. He's such a douche.

Then you know addicts who are not sober. I guarantee you they haven't told their sponsor or their group.

Or they just like to smoke some weed from time to time.

This is the same OCD self-absorbed worm that freaked out in Iraq with Colin Quinn when their NYE gig might have been canceled due to a possible attack. According to CQ, Worm was pacing back and forth muttering about how he had performed every New Year's Eve for the past decade or something, and was only concerned about himself and his pathetic streak.

Colin intellectually smashed him, what a funny excerpt he read.

"My prayers for his death went, as always, unanswered."

clip?

"I’ve been to Iraq a few times on USO tours. The first time I sliced into that sand trap was in 2003. I made that trip with my assistant—a perky Louisiana hayseed named Ellen—and the comics Jim Norton and Laurie Kilmartin. Laurie has since married a very cute young Mexican comic. I hear now that he’s gotten the carta, he’s splayed out on the air mattress in the master bedroom/extended Silverado cab analyzing wrestling magazines like they’re the Talmud and yelling in Spanglish for another cerveza fría, while the once-proud quasi-feminist uses her copy of The Beauty Myth as a changing table for her triplets. But that’s her journey, as they say.

But let’s get to the other fellow traveler on the Iraq journey, one James “Mommy, why does that man have a cascading neck?” Norton. It was my tour, and like a magnanimous Sunni chieftain I was kind enough to bring Jim along. He came cheap. His dressing room rider included: wood chips instead of a rug, a giant wheel for exercise, and pellet food. The first few shows went off without a hitch. Then we hit New Year’s Eve. We’re in the “tent getting ready for the big show at one of Saddam’s palaces, when the USO representative, Tracy, informs us that, due to possible danger from incoming insurgent fire, the show might have to be canceled.

Of course, I took this news with the grace and low-key humility that I’ve worked tirelessly to display. So everything is fine. Laurie is cool. Ellen is cool. Tracy is cool. I’m cool. But then suddenly I hear a quiet buzzing in the tent.

At first I thought it was one of the giant flying insects that have been flying around this part of the world since the Old Testament. I looked around for a newspaper to put a stop to it, when suddenly we all looked and realized it wasn’t an insect—at least not in the conventional sense. No, it was Jim muttering to himself and walking spastically around the room in circles waiting for someone to notice him and ask what was the problem.

Tracy or Ellen inquired and Jim, with a look of sullen reproach on his idiotic baby face, blurts out, “I’ve been doing comedy for twelve years, and I’ve never missed a New Year’s show.” He sulks dramatically; the rest of us stand in stunned silence.

Let me state the situation one more time. We were in Iraq. In a war zone. There are boys and girls putting their young bodies in harm’s way every day to defend our barely defensible way of life here in the United States. They’re not getting a lot of high-profile celebrity visits. (I know that you knew that from the fact that we were there.) But the celebrities that do visit at least give these brave youngsters the reassurance that people appreciate the sacrificial nature of what they are trying to do.

In the midst of that, this incubated hatchling is strutting around, quacking, feathers ruffling, because people don’t realize that this trip is not about giving brief respite to the nineteen-year-olds seeing the frontline horrors and depravities that will never leave their minds. No, no, no, no, no. That’s important, sure. But more pressing is keeping the torch lit on the unnoticed and immaterial New Year’s record of this ludicrous goblin.

I bet our troops would have doubled their valor and courage if they knew that they were protecting the right of a drone to live in a movie within his own mind—a movie in which twelve December 31s in various New Jersey townships drinking a post-show glass of cream soda while being treated to a perfunctory suck-off by a bewildered blubber bunny trying not to smear her hair glitter matter at all, to anyone.

That’s why we could never win in Iraq, because we’re all under the impression that our way of life is precious. Even a guy like Jim Norton is clinging to his one empty tradition like anyone gives a care. My prayers for his death, as always, went unanswered."

-CQ "The Coloring Book: A Comedian Solves Race Relations in America" pg. 229-232

holy shit he gave him the business

It's from Colin's book, the actual quote is great

I bet Jims sipping some coffee reading this saying "yeah you guys poke fun all you want but I hope you never have to go through what I did"

Phew, Jim dodged a relapse right there. Imagine if it was 2 puffs of smoke, he'd be sucking off unwashed gentlemen in an alley somewhere.

So, basically, you're saying Jim's relapse wouldn't have changed his life one bit?

At least he could actually make money instead of blowing money on trannies (pun intended).

I am not allowed to babysit for my friend anymore because she saw a beer in my fridge when she left lunch for her daughter lol

Expecting a couple Uncle Paul jokes huh?

"Shuuuuuure, dat's for her toothache huhuhu"

Hes like Hank Hill accidentally smoking a J and freaking out that he'll be addicted.

"I suck trannie penis, and trannie appendages."

Didn't Hank hill get addicted though! Or he started smoking cigarettes and he thought a joint was a cigarette and smoked it. Then he felt bad or something I forget how that ended

He thought he killed Debbie during his "trip", washed his clothes multiple times and then tried to burn them because the smell from two hits wouldn't come off

The cigarette addiction was a different episode: all the family got addicted.

Isn't that the one where Bobby burned down the church or something? Which one did Hank smoke pot and think he killed someone

Nah: Bobby burned down the church in the episode where they got a female pastor/reverend, whatever... She brought lutefisk to the welcome 'pot luck', and Bobby ate it under the table.

...then got indigestion, and shat it out. Cotton entered the bathroom, mid-shit, and was so overwhelmed by the smell that he left. Panicking, Bobby lit a match to mask the smell before climbing out the window.

Hank accidentally smoked weed in 'High Anxiety': the second of a two-parter about the murder of Buck Strickland's office slut, Debbie.

Thank you for clearing this up sir

I can't find the clip, but I remember during the XM days Jim telling a story about walking down the street with a machete, wanting the FBI to shoot him. I know raging alcoholics and addicts, and I've never seen anyone do something that dumb. That was Jim's lonely nerd self looking for attention. Alcohol was just an excuse to act like an asshole so people would notice him.

That's the kind of shit someone does when they're on PCP not after a six pack.

Ol baby boy probably just walked around with a machete in his coat and muttering to himself. Probably just took a stroll around the block and went back to jerking off and listening to kiss all night.

A slight correction. That exact quote was Jim in studio while Tom was in New Orleans. Jim would never say that to anyones face.

Especially someone with power

What a pussy.

Sir we never joke on this thread.

I love Norden but that addiction pontificating drives me mad. I bet 90 percent of people here have a shitload more severe, prolonged addiction issues than him.

My World of Warcraft addiction was worse.

I had dinner with some hollywood types once in california. I ordered 2 beers with dinner, and afterwards they pulled my sister aside to ask if she needed help getting me into treatment. Some people are just fucking babies.

Jim is borderline autistic sometimes.

"Hey! You're ruining my shtick here, pal!"

The several weeks of being an addict still haunt him to this very day.

fuck i remember those shows i was a senior in high school. that guy tom was the fucking man drunk all the time on air. lol

Lol Norton.

Has a problem with a little pot smoke but is willing to do shows during the most "triggering" event, in the most "triggering" city in the country for an alcoholic. Seems logical.

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Didn't a similar thing happen with Ronnie B on Weird Medicine?

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When vos was on los they were all smoking in front of him and he didn't seem to care.

You know why he's cooler about it than Bob and Jim? Because rich vos was a fucking crackhead and flirted with gay drug dealers and probably more. Bob and Jim both got "sober" because they got in lil bit of trouble when they were like fucking ten and it scared them and everyone around them blamed it on alcohol so they did too. They were kids with no identity yet so they clinged to this AA addict image. Bob Kelly is clearly addicted to food and Jimmy is a fucking CRIMINAL fucks hookers regularly. Neither of these guys are sober. Sober doesn't mean you don't do drugs or drink it. That's abstaining. Sober is a mindset that rich vos has because he saw how fucked he was if continued to use. Bobby and Jimmy were TOLD they needed to quit. That's the difference. Peckahs

Faget deleted his fucking stupid comment. Hey faget fuck you

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guessing this isnt true

I absolutely believe he was an addict of some description. Hes still is an addict. He's just replaced alcohol and drugs. I'm not sure why others are so offended by this or otherwise dispute someone elses addiction. Like most recovering drug or alcohol addicts, Jm shows classic signs of replacing those addictions with other types of addictions and stimulus. The most obvious is the sex addiction. But there's also the need to watch horrific videos etc. Other addicts become religious freaks to compensate. Why the usual reddit retards have a problem with this is baffling and says more about their own self centredness than Jim Norton's.

I agree with Jimmy here. If I were an addict and someone did this to me I would be pissed.

My problem with Jimmy is he brings it up all the time on the show. We know you're an addict we get it we don't need to hear about it every day.

Being an addict doesn't mean everything triggers a relapse. A heroin addict isn't making a beeline down to the docks to blow dicks for fix of heroin after having a sip of beer. Jimmy was just being a retard acting like smoke in his face was a threat to his 40 years of sobriety.

I never said it would trigger a relapse. The problem with blowing marijuana smoke in someone's face outside of being rude is it also is a form of peer pressure, which is the real problem.

When vos was on los they were all smoking in front of him and he didn't seem to care.

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Faget deleted his fucking stupid comment. Hey faget fuck you

Then you know addicts who are not sober. I guarantee you they haven't told their sponsor or their group.

He puts penises in his mouth.

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I'm saying vocal non-smokers are also pole smokers.

I never said it would trigger a relapse. The problem with blowing marijuana smoke in someone's face outside of being rude is it also is a form of peer pressure, which is the real problem.