What if someone crushed Opie's skull against the concrete and Sam had to take over

7  2015-12-22 by Bergli

Do you think the show would be better with Sam as the lead instead of Tits?

31 comments

30  RJPennyweather 2015-12-22

Tell me more about this skull crushing.

2  Kataphractos 2015-12-22

Wouldn't it be better if Sam Roberts had his head cracked open by a hammer and his waifish corpse was stuffed into a garbage can? It would be far more satisfying to see him getting beaten to death after he stirred a bit too much shit with the wrong person, and was not fast enough to get away. Just to listen to his cunt mother crying her cunt eyes out would be worth it. Perhaps she can save a clipping of her precious little guy's hair to add to her collection before they lower his casket into the ground

9  Dagidugidai 2015-12-22

Sam is like crystal meth. Best enjoyed in small recreational doses very long spans of time apart. Anyone who enjoys it often is a freaking weirdo.

5  ThankGodForBeer 2015-12-22

Why do people hate Sam? I think he's a hell of a shit stirrer. Plus, Jocktober.

2  NicNacAttack 2015-12-22

I love Sam when he's stirring shit. I'm not a fan of "let's straddle the fence and hear all sides of the story" Sam. Yuck.

6  SteakSauce66 2015-12-22

He's usually just straddling large, black gentlemen.

6  NicNacAttack 2015-12-22

Lucky duck.

3  SteakSauce66 2015-12-22

TELL ME ABOUT IT!

1  HereForOctober 2015-12-22

more like lucky CUCK or somtin tsss

2  ScorzeMan 2015-12-22

He would suck Jay-Z and Kanye's cock.

1  Kataphractos 2015-12-22

I think you are really talking about Jess.

1  SteakSauce66 2015-12-22

I don't think you know what you're talking about, buster!

1  [deleted] 2015-12-22

[deleted]

1  PassProtect15 2015-12-22

Um, did you just admit to being a casual crystal meth user?

0  biobotX1 2015-12-22

Lol ya that was a bit specific

1  jamesfromdelaware 2015-12-22

Anyone who enjoys it often is a freaking weirdo.

Also very likely to be a trucker.

7  biobotX1 2015-12-22

I'm not sure a head injury would take opie's talent... it might even improve him

1  TheFatMosque 2015-12-22

I don't believe he was talking about taking Opie's talent, he was referring to murdering him sir.

-4  OpiePronounCorrector 2015-12-22

Her*

6  truthie 2015-12-22

Worst. Gimmick. Ever.

-3  OpiePronounCorrector 2015-12-22

You think I fucking want to do this?

1  mascoli 2015-12-22

cringe. stop while you still have some dignity. disappear into obscurity

0  OpiePronounCorrector 2015-12-22

Her*

2  20somethingzilch 2015-12-22

Sam would be good as a 3rd mic just because he plays off Jim/Chip/Edgar/Various other characters really well and his instigating things makes for entertainment situations. Also, I laughed really hard at the abrupt/violent skull crushing against concrete.

2  rawkfawk 2015-12-22

Sooo much better. Sam can run a show and has a much more tolerable list of personality defects than the Opester.

0  Kataphractos 2015-12-22

Nope. Sam Roberts nasally, whiny voice, his wrestling fetish, his inability to eat adult foods, and his overall smarmy personality is magnitudes worse than anything that shitdick Gregggg does. Gregg Might be worth a punch in the mouth, but Sam is worthy of a push out of a 10 story window.

1  RikTheMick 2015-12-22

That, Sir, is a lie.

1  uppity-negro 2015-12-22

Really?

1  MrKrinkel 2015-12-22

Sounds like simple assault to me. Would this hypothetical hero have some sort of weapon?

1  SteakSauce66 2015-12-22

A magician's wand.

2  biobotX1 2015-12-22

Uncle Paul's magic wand. Happy halloweenie

1  Tell_Em_Fred 2015-12-22

YOu are a sick fuck.

0  FootThingOnHisFoot 2015-12-22

Sam rules!

0  Kataphractos 2015-12-22

Nope. Sam Roberts nasally, whiny voice, his wrestling fetish, his inability to eat adult foods, and his overall smarmy personality is magnitudes worse than anything that shitdick Gregggg does. Gregg Might be worth a punch in the mouth, but Sam is worthy of a push out of a 10 story window.